annonymous-loner-blog

[annonymous-loner-blog]

Why

Sometimes you womder will the person before you ever really be gone? Then that person starts finally disappearing. Then like a bolt of lightning you are right back where you started the other peraon is back and it's like they were never gone.. Why is it so hard to show you want only one person? Why is it so hard to tell the first person they are no longer wanted? Why is it so hard... To act like you actually want me not them? I guess I'll never know why...

[annonymous-loner-blog]

Its sad when you are shown that the one thing you thought you were good at youre acutally not

[annonymous-loner-blog]

Old habits

It sucks.. It really does. When you thought you were doimg so well but deep down you know you never were. It sucks where everything falls down around you and all you have is yourself to blame. You knew from the start that you had always been the peraon everything and everyone left behind and forgot. Thats why you fell into those habits to start with. You thought you were getting stronger working away from your past. But it always comes back. Doesnt it?

[annonymous-loner-blog]

The rings

You gave her her birthday present last year. It was the first birthday you spent with her. You both knew you had and still have many birthdays to spend yogether. You both knew thwn you wanted to be together 50 years from then. What you didn't know is what those rings would do for her. You knew how damaged she was at times and how put together she was at others. You knew she delt with depression, but you didn't know she still does. You didn't know that depression falls on her at random times. You didn't know that when that depression hits her she takes things wrong. You didnt know that the only things that help her through that depression is the rings that you gave her. The rings that she sees everyday, the rings that show her no matter how low she may fall she will have someone there. The rings she never told you how much she truely loves. The rings you don't even really think of anymore. They are the rings that mean everything to her...

[annonymous-loner-blog]

Her

We all wish we could be her.. So perfect at least in his eyes.. But will we ever be her? I doubt it. Not because we can't truely be someone we aren't. More so because no matter hpw hard we push ourselves to be better to be more perfect to be.. More like her, we will never be because in his eyes he doesn't see. He doesn't see what he's doing. He doesn't see himself staring at her silently judging her but in the best way. He's npt judging her the way he judges you. He sees you and think he can point out the flaws in what you do without dicouraging you. He thinks you have a grip on what is damaging you but really you don't. You never have and from your view you never will. He looks at her and sees everything she's doing right. Then he takes the time to praise her. The way he used to praise you.. Where did that man go? Why doesn't he still want to praise you that way? You fell for that man didn't you? But they all change.. Just like we do. It takes so little to damage some of us but those who damage us don't see that they are they never will.. Even if we take the time to point out what they are doing to us they wont realize. They will tell us we are being crazy because in their eyes we are being crazy. We are jealous over someone they don't want. But no matter what they say we will see it as we aren't good enough.. Will we ever be? Are we trying to be good enough for ourselves or for them? In a way we know they answer to both of these questions, but we will never want to admit that we want to be good enough for ourselves not for them.. Will we ever get to the point where we can be? Maybe...