anonymouseeverything

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As cool as being corrupted would be, my spirit is lowkey indomitable and I have an automatic aversion to doing what people tell me to do

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"so many of my 2013 fics come with the grace and subtlety of bludgeoning the reader with a bat" nah let me tell you, for 15 year old me, your fics and the phantom were a huge part of the realization that you really can just write anything. who is going to stop you? god? the police? torturing the fictional character and having fun doing it is a form of both creativity and self-care lol. sometimes you just want to get stabby!

There is an understudied condition afflicting 10-20% of 15-year-olds called Have To Torture The Character With Every Torture Machine. Scientists are saying the condition is benign and is best treated by opening a word processor and writing the most fucked up fiction about the character.

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Usually south park's relevancy feels very fake and surface level to me, but it's really something how trump and his base are actually, visibly much more enraged by this than they've been about any other criticism, any other show, any other enemy I've seen in the entire near-decade of his political career. Fucking South Park got to them more than the combined effort of a million other comedians, journalists, parodies, academic criticisms or protest efforts. Like it's BAD. Like they want the creators in prison and want to consider this a hate crime.

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thanks to my saintlike devotion i have been granted a flaming sword

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lying in front of the street cleaner

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immune to JoJo Siwa discourse bc I remember living through the Miley Cyrus "I'm not a teenager anymore!!!" phase and whatever happened to Justin B.

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You know what? Forget the discourse. This is no longer my hill to die on.

You wanna ship canonically aspec characters because “aro/ace people can still date/have sex”? Okay, then. LET’S DO IT.  I wanna see an aromantic character with an alloromantic love interest. I wanna see that confession of undying love and the moment when the aro character says they will never feel the same way—not romantically.

I wanna see the asexual character with their allosexual partner. I wanna see that moment when the ace characters tries sex with their partner for the first time because they want to make them happy only to realize that they are 100% sex repulsed.

I wanna see the two demiromantics who don’t even know if what they feel is romantic attraction, but they adore each other and just want to make healthy snacks together and destroy each other at Mario Kart.

I wanna see the two aces who love sensual affection and are figuring out what they define as sexual or not.

I wanna see the romance + sex neutral aroace who happily and consensually does whatever makes their partner happy…but their partner still struggles with feeling undesired. 

Oh, babe. You thought shipping an aspec character would be just like shipping an allo character? 

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indeed search easy jobs for losers

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On this, the anniversary of the lunar landing, let us also celebrate the greatest post-mission achievement by a crewman.

I refer, of course, to the time Buzz Aldrin (age 72 at the time) cold-cocked a moon landing conspiracy theorist straight in his smug face after being accused of being a coward, liar, and thief.

Yes, someone was indeed dumb enough to tell a man so unafraid of death that he was willing to go into the void on a fragile explosive rocket, a coward.

Said dumbass was filming this confrontation as some sort of proof of moon fraud, but has instead captured this glorious moment of near-cosmic justice for us to loop for all time.

Aldrin was not charged with any crime. He should have been given another medal for public service.

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"The word pandemonium was coined by John Milton as the name for the Parliament of Hell" is an all-timer etymology. Oh yeah did you hear that Mrs Higgins's dogs got loose at the village fête? It was like a vast golden edifice in which fallen angels debate their strategies for vengeance against god, yeah.

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ppl are rlly trying to defend being on your phone during a movie in the theater what is going on

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After many years of selective breeding, they've finally developed a breed of phoenix that, rather than self-immolating itself into ash, instead roasts itself to a perfect internal 165° F while burning off all the feathers, resulting in an instant, ready-to-eat poultry dinner.

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Switching between these every day