anottershambles

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my silly little jester costume for the play I’m in is so fire you all wish you were me

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untraceable cyberbucks

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Once your eyes have been opened you can read lesbianism into any media. At a certain point it doesn’t even take effort it comes naturally

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Happy pride month to my dad. When I came out as bi to him, this man googled what it ment, look at me and said "ohh. Yeah. You get that from me. You'd have far more siblings of I only shaged women." And went right back to his work emails.

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for a minute i definitely forgot that kanye west had changed his name to ye and was wondering why this accusatory headline was written in shakespearean language

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I should be able to both read for 8hrs a night and sleep for 8hrs a night. That I cannot is very rude and, frankly, poor design.

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“Medieval peasants couldn’t handle my Spotify playlist” but could YOU handle a medieval bard relaying the epic of Beowulf over the course of an hour? Humble yourself.

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Today I was trying to chat up this girl standing with her friend at a lesbian bar and said “oh are you two together?” meaning were you friends before being next to each other at this bar and one turns to the other and goes with all the venom of a black mamba snake “I don’t know Cara, are we?” and I was like you know what? not my table

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i feel very stongly that elizabeth 100% would have sworn darcy to eternal secrecy about the fact that he had already proposed once unsuccessfully when she accepted, solely bc you just KNOW mr collins' smug ass would be like, "oh ho ho! huh! so apparently it IS the usual with young ladies to reject the addresses of the man whom they secretly mean to accept when he applies for their favor! hm! interesting!" and then she would be honor-bound to leap over lady catherine's dining table and strangle him

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ive seen ppl using /gen, but what abt /nom, /voc, /acc, /dat and /abl?

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The fact that im getting raw dogged by life everyday. Don’t have any medication to take the edge off. Nor any addiction, I don’t even got a religion or spirituality to fall back on. Im facing this life stone cold sober every goddamn day??? Why???

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The Thing (1982)

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Time for a new Jelly, new good vibes! Good luck everyone, it’s gunna be good soon

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i always click the "track package" button as soon as i get the email. "oh boy i wonder where my package is!" warehouse.

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i will not be having an ipad baby. i will be having a Pea baby