antiapocalypso-blog

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confirmations of human nature?

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𝗟𝗶𝗳𝗲 𝗗𝘂𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗖𝗢𝗩𝗜𝗗-𝟭𝟵 - Yukon Tavern, Sellwood, Oregon.

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daily rituals

i was supposed to wake up by 9 every day this past week, but i’ve been pretty depressive since i returned to florida and so i’ve been starting my days at noon or so. this makes my time awake fairly short, because i’m asleep by midnight and sleep over 11 hours on any given night. regardless, i’ve been trying to practice things that keep me occupied:

cooking – always from scratch with fresh ingredients

reading – right now the aeneid for roman lit (i want to eventually read for leisure again though)

cleaning and organizing – different tasks each day, but something to keep my body and mind focused on something productive

television – a rerun (well, i never finished) of homeland, now that i’ve been far more radicalized than i was at 15 years old

alone time – spending 24/7 with my partner was causing me a lot of frustration and anger so i’ve dialed it back

walks – just around the neighborhood, since all the parks have been closed, but i hate walking around my own community

substances – that’s all i’ll say about that!

things i want to add to this daily regimen:

drop-spindle weaving – my other classics prof has sent us a kit in the mail, so hopefully, i’ll be learning how to weave while philip makes a quipu for his inca class

exercise – at least 5 times a week; there’s no excuse for me not to now that i have all the time in the world

meditation – my mother is a master, but i’ve never been very good at this

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i have few words to describe this situation. i can only say it's absolutely f-cking crazy. this is crazy.

sk, 3.27.20 over facetime.

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confirmations and contestations of human nature

as a general rule, i do not believe in the concept of a single ‘human nature.’ i don’t believe in human nature at all, i think. we are far too culturally and individually diverse to accept a sweeping generalization of the ‘nature’ of humans, and it has been disproved again and again on all sides of the aisle. how is it human nature to be caring and nurturing, but it is also human nature to steal and remain self-interested? this goes back to our discussion on cognitive dissonance – perhaps it is indeed possible to hold these two competing ideas as conceptions of human nature – but i think trying to wedge humanity into holes of characteristics and traits is unproductive and leads to many dead ends. 

defying stereotypes of human nature and enacting stereotypes of human nature are sometimes the same thing, but i’ll try to make a list here... i honestly don’t know many ideas of human nature since i reject the concept, so if i pull from anywhere else i’ll cite it.

enacting

humans are self-interested and greedy: displayed in the gross hoarding and oftentimes reselling of supplies that others are desperate for, including hand sanitizer and toilet paper. there are also people who have taken advantage of the situation in other ways, like marketing ‘survival kits’ and selling them at three times the value price in a time of crisis (to some extent the blame falls on people who will spend insane amounts of money on this, but i still think the initial concept is gross).

humans are inherently social beings: this has become quite obvious in the past few weeks; folks who do self-isolate look eagerly towards their next grocery shopping outing, and those who don’t continue to occupy densely-populated spaces because their need for connection seems to override their need for self-preservation (or maybe this is just.. stupidity?)

humans want to be appreciated: maybe this is specifically about donald trump, re: “All I want them to do, very simple, I want them to be appreciative. I don't want them to say things that aren't true. I want them to be appreciative. We've done a great job.” he added that this was about the Army Corp, FEMA, Mike Pence, etc. but the sentiment remains the same. he’s definitely playing into this one!

defying

humankind is evil: i think this idea of human nature is tired and very misanthropic in an uninteresting way. there are way too many examples of the opposite; many people going out of their way to help others during this crisis.

humans always act in their best interest: disregarding the recommendations that health professionals have put out and continuing to throw support behind a politician who has made clear that he is not equally concerned about all people is absolutely not in the agent’s best interest, yet there are countless people who do this daily!

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i have been reading stories about what doctors and nurses (as well as other medical staff) have been going through in the last week in New York City, the new epicenter of the coronavirus. it truly sounds apocalyptic in the sense of desperation, fear, uncertainty, and of course, death. today i saw this post and reflected on my daily post from a few days ago, where i’d said the apocalypse had not yet come to south florida. from the perspectives of medical personnel and ill patients, it certainly has, but wow – even from New York, the same phenomenon is occurring. i haven’t thought this out completely yet – i’d need to discuss it with someone – but there are layers to apocalyptic thinking and living, and it seems again as though it doesn’t extend past hospital doors in some ways?

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refer to today’s daily post

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apocalyptic patterns and disruptions

apocalypse seems like it has already come and begun to pass for other nations¹, but it has not made itself known largely from my perspective in south florida. there are constant and ongoing cases of panic buying and hoarding but it almost seems like it doesn’t exist past the publix vestibule.²  the beaches and athletic courts were packed with tourists and residents until the city put caution tape around them. i’m on the local facebook group for the city (what a mess) and people continue to ask for hair salon recommendations, albeit with some strong resistance in the comment section. i encountered a group of 20+ people my age congregating across the street from my publix plaza in a sandy lot right outside the powerline park, leaning against two SUVS – the strangest, most improbable location and grouping of people I’ve encountered. 

in fact, i’ve seen more people out in my neighborhood these past two weeks than i’ve ever seen in my life! i pass at least 30 people on my evening walk around the neighborhood whereas i used to encounter none. families of 6+ biking, walking their dog, or chatting with neighbors. i don’t know another way this could’ve ever happened? the apocalyptic pandemic is, at least within neighborhoods here, putting people more in touch with immediate members of their community than ever. 

it’s evidence that cultural shift to an ‘apocalypse’ mindset has not yet turned here, but i don’t know if it can if this administration continues to deny and suppress the news. does this pandemic only become apocalyptic when we all acknowledge it, or does it take everyone around you becoming sick? i’ve been keeping up with media and journalism coming out of italy, and before that wuhan. this extends past mainstream media like the New York Times and Washington Post and into viral (but verified) videos, threads, and postings from people in those nations. i have been viewing the ‘apocalypse’ through the lens of journalism but i don’t have the lived experience. what am i missing? there’s so much i can’t and won’t know. i’m not sure what the news articles will say if the situation in broward becomes truly dire. what does a widespread plague in 2020 look like? i guess we’re going to find out if this keeps up.

1: on a societal/national level, we have not yet reached the widespread peak stage of china and italy, though of course individual families here have suffered already.

2: side note: i spent three minutes googling the word that refers to the space between two sliding doors, the ‘vestibule,’ and now i have gone down a rabbit hole of flixr bloggers who inhabit the ‘interest in public remodeling’ niche.’