aozoranoshita - Tumblr blog

[aozoranoshita]

revising your writing is just like "is this weird. is this a weird sentence. is this the weirdest most poorly-worded sentence ever written by anyone" and the sentence in question is "he walked across the room"

[aozoranoshita]

posting niche fic on ao3 is like releasing a small creature into the wild and hoping it survives and finds sustenance

[aozoranoshita]

the worst thing about writing or any kind of craft is having an idea you're really excited to make a reality but then you sit down and realize how much work it's going to take to get to that point and suddenly you feel like those two little gay guys in the mountain in the lord of the rings

[aozoranoshita]

don't want to write I want to think very hard about my fic until it emerges from my head fully formed like athena

[aozoranoshita]

park rangering at night

when I left the visitor center at 5 it was overcast but the astronomy club had emailed that there was a 50/50 chance it would clear out according to the weather forecast so some of them are planning to show up tonight. 50/50 chance is the Worst weather forecast possible, might as well flip a coin it gives me zero information, but it's such a common forecast in the south in the summer I don't even bother to check the weather most days. if it rains it's a pleasant surprise, until sometimes it's not a rainstorm it's a hurricane and I hadn't noticed until I try to go to the grocery store and all the ingredients for milk sandwiches are sold out.

anyway leaving my house at around 8:30 to walk back down towards the center of the park, it's dark out. last time I did this a month ago it was still light outside at this time but the days have gotten shorter. I have my hurricane lamp (meant for camping but I use it when the power blows in those surprise summer storms) and it is DARK so I'm using the most powerful beam to sweep the sand path as I walk for murderers or wild hogs or whatever else could be in the woods in the dark. have to pass the cemetery to get to the field where the astronomers (in theory) are set up, which creeps me out every time because one of the graves has some solar powered lights next to it that glow for a few hours after the sun goes down. I know what they are but still, seeing them makes me think of ghosts. I don't even believe in ghosts, but it is awfully dark.

I switch my lamp to the red lowlight setting so I don't mess up any astrophotography as I approach the field. I can see two sets of red lights, so two of the promised astronomers have shown up at least. everyone else called it with the threat of cloud cover. but now as my eyes are adjusting I notice hey, the clouds DID move out. I can definitely see stars. I wander up and it's two guys I know, so we exchange pleasantries and I turn off my light and listen to them murmur over their telescope equipment. "hey," I say after a moment, "hey. that's the milky way, right?" the three of us look up and it sure is.

it's been said before it's been said before it's been said before but how to describe the stars in the sky? there's a band of misty haze running north-south across the black. there's a dark gap in the middle, one of the astronomers says something about a dust band and I'll take his word for it. they talk to each other about the milky way going "right through cygnus and cassiopeia" which I recognize as a swan and a princess but gun to my head I couldn't point out the actual constellations. they go back to their equipment, every so often just saying "wow!!" because again, what else can you say? the band of it is fairly defined to the south towards the forest, and it reaches grasping towards the north before it dissipates into the light pollution of the city thirty minutes away from us. while the astronomers look through their scopes at globular clusters ("check out m15, you can see why messier thought it was a comet") I am standing head all the way back trying to see as much of the sky as possible.

it's easy to tell apart the things that move, airplanes flashing while satellites and debris maintain a steady, unblinking pace as smaller dots. I get the occasional shooting star ("meteor" I say out loud for the professionals) distinctive with their arcing flash and quick disappearance. there's a thick ring of trees all around us so the horizon isn't visible, but it's kind of like there are stars there anyway because the last tenacious fireflies of the season are bobbing along and flashing their lights intermittently. there's also the steady droning of hordes upon hordes of cicadas, and the frogs singing of course, and a lone barred owl somewhere. it makes me think of another ranger I worked with in the mountains who could imitate the call perfectly. with my head tilted all the way back I am baring my neck to the natural vampire of the swamp, the mosquito. they're not as bad as they could be, with all the rain we've gotten recently, but I do have to wave an arm around every so often and the disruption in the air makes their buzzing go confused and almost indignant at the foiled attempt to bleed me dry.

so I'm slightly itchy and extremely sweaty. breathing in I might as well be breathing underwater, and of course the smell and taste of the air is like pond scum and rotting leaves, a little sweet a little earthy a lot WET. knowing it would be a small crowd I am dressed down and not in full uniform but still in long sleeves long pants so there's less surface area available for biting bugs. after an hour and half standing up head back I have a crick in my neck and my clothes are sweat through, so I make one more round of admiring noises with the astronomers and leave them to it.

trudging back up the path I notice it runs north-south, parallel with the milky way right above me. to the west the big dipper has been gradually making it's way down to the horizon, like someone is very slowly lowering it into the waters of the swamp. I wait as long as possible to turn my flashlight back on, make it a decent way into the woods before even my adjusted night vision can't make up for the trees blocking the starlight above me. plus the cemetery is coming up. with the light on I can tell a large deer has come through since I came down, hoofprints in the sand. thinking about animals of the deep dark woods when I walk back into my house and am immediately accosted by three cats wondering what the hell I was doing out there. they want dinner. the lights of my house are practically blinding. I chug a glass of lemonade to get the swamp taste out of my mouth and go to feed the cats.

[aozoranoshita]

✨CONTRIBUTOR LINEUP✨ Here's our full line-up of contributors for Aoex Cui-zine! Thank you to our participants. We'd also like to announce zine pre-orders! Save the date for ✨October 1st✨ Look forward to previews of the amazing works that will be in the zine!

[aozoranoshita]

okay okay okay going back to work, coding maybe kind of fixed

IT'S DAZATSU WEEK! I wrote 3 fics, all for the same day because I love to stress myself out!

Can I interest you in some BEAST au (all angst, 7.2k, rated Teen)? -> and like a sinner before the gates of heaven

How about Dazai being horny and having feelings (actually surprisingly sweet for the prompt "danger", 4.6k, rated Explicit)? -> maybe I got terminal vertigo

Or if you want to see the fruit of my suffering, I did a Swan Princess mashup (it's arranged marriage fun! 16.4k, rated General)! -> sure as the day ends in sunset

[aozoranoshita]

Prince Osamu and Prince Atsushi are engaged to be married from a young age and neither of them are happy about it. Of course, when you add a magical kidnapping and being cursed to turn into a swan into the mix, it gets even more complicated.

A Swan Princess fusion that got a little weird.

Written for dazatsuweek2024, day 5 prompt: arranged marriage

[aozoranoshita]

ao3 deleted all my coding for my favorite part of the third dazatsuweek fic and it doesn't look right anymore but I don't have time to fix it before I have to go back to work I am in AGONY

[aozoranoshita]

It doesn't occur to Dazai that he should maybe talk to Atsushi about his feelings the boundaries of what they're doing until he's already done unspeakable things to the guy.

Written for dazatsuweek2024, day 5 prompt: danger

*RATED E FOR EXPLICIT BTW

[aozoranoshita]

Atsushi is "rescued" from the Port Mafia. This does not mean Dazai is done with him.

Written for dazatsuweek2024, day 5 prompt: BEAST au

[aozoranoshita]

yes it's past midnight yes I'm still writing this fic yes it's gotten out of control

[aozoranoshita]

yes it's past midnight yes I'm still writing this fic yes it's gotten out of control

[aozoranoshita]

USERNAME LORE GIVE IT TO ME NOW YOU ALL

[aozoranoshita]

*thinks up an idea for a silly quick piece* okay haha let's whip something up real quick

*idea gets more complicated*

*idea gets more complicated*

*idea gets more complicated*

*idea gets more complicated*

oh no

[aozoranoshita]

man if I gotta make bad art, it should at least be easy! But it’s not! It is also hard to make this bad art

[aozoranoshita]

experimenting with a fake screenshot hm hm hm