applesandbannas747

[applesandbannas747]

i know this is old news but i literally can not get over the fact that a 'covey' literally means a small flock of birds. the covey people really are their own little flock of songbirds that were never meant to be tied to one place. suzanne collins the woman you are but when i CATCH you i swear.

[applesandbannas747]

Happy pride month to my dad. When I came out as bi to him, this man googled what it ment, look at me and said "ohh. Yeah. You get that from me. You'd have far more siblings of I only shaged women." And went right back to his work emails.

[applesandbannas747]

*cigarette drag* it's time to fuck my furniture

[applesandbannas747]

i have been hearing there is a big CHUCK TINGLE easter egg in game DATE EVERYTHING very cool buckaroos what an honor. MY ONLY QUALM is they should have asked me to voice one of the living objects. COME ON. maybe next time

[applesandbannas747]

woah..... the bed lady named betty sure is a baddie.....

[applesandbannas747]

Me and one of my IRLs had this interaction about Hector last night and I felt I needed to share with the class

[applesandbannas747]

"hear me out" and its like Marceline. dude everyone wants to fuck marceline i want to talk to someone whos hear me out is an air conditioner

[applesandbannas747]

They would not be happy about my mod folders

[applesandbannas747]

Even though you're a filthy fuckin cheater, I still love ya😭!

[applesandbannas747]

Hi 💖 I’m ✨Betty✨ and I’m your 😴Bed 🥰

[applesandbannas747]

just met a three month old pomeranian named horchata. her paw was the size of my fingertip. she looked like half a dandelion fluff

[applesandbannas747]

[applesandbannas747]

[applesandbannas747]

the summoning

[applesandbannas747]

[applesandbannas747]

now that my jury duty is over and i can legally talk about my jury duty, a short list of things that i have learned about jury duty:

when the judge wants to sidebar with the lawyers they turn on a static noise machine for the jury. this is very like the experience of being trapped inside a television

sometimes they load the entire court -- judge, lawyers, court reporters, jury, etc. -- onto a bus and take you all on a little field trip to see a crime scene. this is very like the experience of being in elementary school

when you are on a jury field trip you May Not share a seat, you May Not speak, and you May Not look at anything you have not been officially told you can look at. this is very like the experience of being trapped inside a point-and-click adventure except that instead of being limited in your investigation by the constraints of the game mechanics, you are instead limited in your investigation by the court officers herding you around like ducks with their long wooden Official Court Staffs

no matter how much an FBI agent may encourage the court to call him kevin, the court will not call him kevin

[applesandbannas747]

hot croc bun

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