ardhoniel

[ardhoniel]

Loved one got top surgery yesterday so I made this for him but I think y’all would appreciate it too

[ardhoniel]

[ardhoniel]

i wish i had two brain cells. my one is working overtime

[ardhoniel]

From Ursula Vernon: Screaming at these people works. They’re fundamentally wimps, we just have to actually DO the screaming instead of preemptively admitting defeat.

I am talking about my fellow Americans, not the Democrats. We actually need to scream, gang, not just complain that Schumer isn’t.

In other words:

[ardhoniel]

@staff our identities aren’t nsfw and we will not stand for them to be treated as such

[ardhoniel]

YouTube ads: (30 seconds of irrelevant wackiness) Oh hohohoho the creature wants the Food!

Facebook ads: (fabricated sponsored "news" article) Here is why, everyone is buying the new thing. Trust us everyone is buying it

TikTok ads: (paid actor) I just bought this thing and it totally changed my life! Join me on my Journey, with Product...

Tumblr ads: (ai generated image of heaven) The Truth About Your Elbows

[ardhoniel]

[ardhoniel]

[footage of Victor Frankenstein sewing together female body parts to make a mate for the Creature while Lou Bega’s Mambo no.5 plays]

[ardhoniel]

the worst part of "you'll understand when you're older" is that you really do understand when you're older

[ardhoniel]

Lol, good stuff.

[ardhoniel]

somehow instead of saying "as a treat", I've started using the phrase "for morale", as if my body is a ship and its crew, and I (the captain) have to keep us in high spirits, lest we suffer a mutiny in the coming days.

and so I will eat this small block of fancy cheese, for morale. I will take a break and drink some tea, for morale. I will pick up that weird bug, for morale.

I'm not sure if it helps, but it does entertain me

[ardhoniel]

i can’t wait for when chatGPT and ai image generation also crashes and each prompt cost $50 an attempt. oh you can’t get your stolen big tiddy anime ghibli art for free anymore? you want to buy real big boy art from real artists now? beg for it. beg for it like a dog.

[ardhoniel]

*Friends' theme song starts playing*

[ardhoniel]

legitimately my first feminist awakening as a ten year old child was realizing that girls were expected to respect “boy stuff” but boys were never expected to respect “girl stuff”

[ardhoniel]

[ardhoniel]

was behind a truck today with a bumper sticker that said "JESUS CAN HELP YOU" and in my head i was like 🙄 ok but then i saw a second, handmade sign on the side of the truck that said "taskrabbit: call jesus torres" and his phone number