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dont mind me, im just obsessed with @buggachat 's vampire au

i need to know more about adrien NOW NOW NOW

marinette tries all the things she used to do with him to try and get him to come around but like. it doenst work GAH

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my empire of dirt!!!❤️❤️❤️ #MyDirt

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HIGHLY foreboding thrift store omen

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some highlights from my students’ romeo and juliet modern interpretation projects:

- someone made a username for friar laurence with 420 at the end - the same kid who put 69 in romeo’s username like i wouldn’t know what either of those things mean - the girl who added ‘clean’ at the end of all the songs on her juliet playlist like lmao girl i know spotify doesn’t have the clean version - the kid who said romeo and juliet killed each other - the weird dichotomy of kids who put love story on their playlist vs the kids who choose bad blood - the kid who wrote ‘get a room’ as tybalt’s comment on romeo’s couple pic - the kid who said ‘romeo is probably one of those douches who follows a ton of people so they follow him back and then he unfollows all of them’ - the one who legitimately used the word ‘alrighty’ do kids say this in their text messages???? i thought i was the one talking like an elderly person but okay - the one who made romeo’s username ‘montagoose’ - the only kid who acknowledged that posting about your secret relationship on instagram was a bad idea - the girl who wrote that romeo would unironically say ‘#blessed’. she’s right. - the one single solitary girl who wrote mercutio as gay as shakespeare did (she’s also the only one who used mercutio at all which is a tragedy but whatever) - the one who wrote romeo’s insta bio as ‘thus with a kiss i die… LOL RIP ME 😂💀’ - the one who made benvolio’s username benvoliYO

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i can handle one (1) Event™ per day. whether it be a phone call, an appointment, trip to the grocery store, play date with a friend, etc. only one, that's it. any more than that and i am Stressed

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My body keeps announcing: NAPTIME! and then starts immediately shutting off higher brain function.

Without fail I close my eyes to give in to the nap and my body is like. Nevermind. No sleeping.

Body, please. Work with me. A little nap could fix me, did you think of that when you recalled the nap attack? Did you???

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Getting pampered

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“I tampered with that persons food/drink order because I thought it would be funny” is like saying “I cut your brakes out of your car because I thought it would be funny”. that’s not a joke. It’s almost premeditated murder

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the way people react to the stupidity of safehands for left-handed women in the stormlight archive is... very revealing of how 90% of the population is right-handed.

"isn't that stupid?" yes

"wouldn't that mess you up?" yes

"so they're just... forced to use their non-dominant hand?" we used to get beaten for this in schools, guys

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You see, Perry the Platypus, when Vanessa was a little girl, she wanted to take estrogen. Of course, I said yes. And since then she’s always been my little girl. Well recently, Vanessa’s school deadnamed her on her reports! Can you believe that!? I mean we live in a fairly progressive area and—hey, isn’t that not allowed in public schools??

Anyway, that’s when I got the idea for THIS! The deadname-eraser-inator! That way, not only will Vanessa no longer be deadnamed, but EVERY OTHER TRANS PERSON IN THE TRI! STATE! AREA!

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not to be an american but like. air conditioning is the greatest invention of all time.

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we all got that one beloved mutual who disappeared off the face of the earth one day

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^ water

air ▼

the drowning machine