asimplelobsterhat - Tumblr blog

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I think we were all too harsh on Pirates Of The Caribbean: At World’s End in 2007. Any movie that has a pirate officiate a wedding while helming a ship and fighting off undead sailors and saying shit like “Dearly Beloved, we be gathered here today… TO NAIL YER GIZZARDS TO THE MAST, YE POXY CUR!” with an epic musical score playing is probably at least a 8/10 for that alone

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Pirates of the shitpost

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Elizabeth: You don't think I can fight because of my gender!

James: I don't think you can fight because you're in a wedding dress. For what it's worth, I don't think Jack can fight in that dress either.

Jack: Perhaps not. But I would make a radiant bride.

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Welcome to the Caribbean we've got...

The Caribbean Where We're LGBT (Losers Gays Badasses and Traumatized) (insp)

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"ew gross why is Elizabeth Turner on land and wearing a DRESS, with a KID, in the epilogue of the third PotC movie?!"

that is. literally what she wanted this whole time

she's adventurous, but she was kidnapped onto the Black Pearl, then did basically everything else that she did in that movie for the express purpose of saving Will

second movie! she and Will are about to get married and live happily ever after, presumably pirate-free, when Cutler Beckett fucks things up. then Will gets sent off to get the compass and she follows- again, intending primarily to save him. she takes an interest in not letting the East India Company become superpowered rulers of the sea at the end, but that, too, is a quest with a specific goal. not just "gallivant around swashing and buckling as a Pirate King." and that carries her through Stranger Tides, coupled with Will Oh My God Stop Being In PerilTM

even BECOMING the Pirate King was something she kind of fell into because the Brethren Court needed to act and not just sit around in a stalemate

I'm not saying the girl wasn't into pirates and adventure on her own- from an early age, she definitely was. but "be safe, get home, marry Will, have his babies" seems to have been the agenda from the start

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Time for some chaos

(couple more pics ‘cause both outfits are fire)

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My favorite thing abt the relationship dynamic of Pirates of the Caribbean is that Will and Elizabeth value Jack enough to save his life in the first movie and then spend the next two movies wondering if it was worth it

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Robin Hood (1973) Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End (2007)

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ok but why is the very idea of pirates of the Caribbean such a turn on like it makes me YEARN to be a woman with a pirate ship and a big silly hat and amazing boots but also to have Elizabeth Swann’s hair how do I tell the adult world I know what I want to be when I grow up but that kind of piracy (stylish adventure hair flowing kind) isn’t really accessible in this day and age

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yayyy pastrami 4

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let's do this partner!!!

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the english language is truly a wonder

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Good for them! Hope they win 😌✌️

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Well done, congratulations...

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joe biden: how do i look in this chef hat, giuseppe?

giuseppe, the presidential butler: waifish and breedable as always, muy lord

joe biben: fabulous. pass me the Improbable Meat