ask-nick-carraway - Tumblr blog

[ask-nick-carraway]

Happy birthday Nick! Have you done anything fun to celebrate with friends or family?

Dear Anonymous,

Thank you for asking! Jay did not know yesterday was my birthday as I had not told him. We have instead decided to celebrate my birthday today. He suggested we use his pool while the weather remains warm, before draining it for the fall.

Sincerely,

Nick Carraway

[ask-nick-carraway]

Happy birthday Nick!! I hope the day goes well :D

Dear Anonymous,

Thank you! I hope the rest of your day also goes well. What is the meaning behind the colon and the capitalized ‘d’ at the end of your letter? Was it an error?

Sincerely,

Nick Carraway

[ask-nick-carraway]

happy 30th birthday dude. or are you a different age? hard for me to keep track sometimes.

best,

Anna

Dear Anna,

Thank you! I will actually be turning 31 this year. Time can move awfully quickly as one grows older. I find that what age you are turning on any given year matters less compared to the people that you spend your time with.

Sincerely,

Nick Carraway

[ask-nick-carraway]

Happy birthday!! I bring you a cake

✨🎂✨

Dear Mx. Hyperfixation,

Thank you very much for the cake! I hope it will be big enough to share.

Sincerely

Nick Carraway

[ask-nick-carraway]

happy birthday! Are you doing anything special for today?

Dear Anonymous,

Thank you! Although, I am curious as to how so many people who I do not know were able to find out about my date of birth. I never thought my writing was that successful. This brief period of celebrity will definitely aid my confidence.

Sincerely,

Nick Carraway

[ask-nick-carraway]

happy birthday nick

Dear Mr. Trombonist,

Thank you for remembering that it was today!

To tell you the truth, I feel somewhat abashed. You know enough about me to remember my birthday, but I know next to nothing about you. Is there anything you would allow me to know about you?

Sincerely,

Nick Carraway

[ask-nick-carraway]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY OLD!!!!!! 🎂 🎂 🎂

Dear Matt,

I cannot tell whether this is meant to be an insult or not.

Either way, I appreciate you going out of your way to send me this letter. I have indeed lived another year and I have chosen to spend this day thinking about all the things I have gained rather than any concern I previously had about aging.

Sincerely,

Nick Carraway

[ask-nick-carraway]

Happy birthday, Mr. Carraway!! Do you have any birthday plans?

Dear Anonymous,

Thank you! I am surprised that I am well known enough that people would know when my birthday was. However, I appreciate you checking in.

I don’t normally plan events for today; but I imagine Jay will set out to change that once he finds out. Wish me luck!

Sincerely,

Nick Carraway

[ask-nick-carraway]

Dear Nick,

Do you own a motorboat, or enjoy boating at all? I've heard you live near Long Island Sound, on a little bay. In a cardboard box or something like that.

Sincerely,

Matt

Dear Matt,

It is true that I live on West Egg, the less fashionable side of the bay. I do not own any sort of boat however; I prefer using the bay to swim. In fact, my neighbor Jay Gatsby was generous enough to let me use his beach.

I have not seen him in a while. I should remedy that.

Sincerely,

Nick Carraway

[ask-nick-carraway]

hi nick! how ya doing? i heard you got quite the shock earlier this evening!

Dear Mr. Trombonist,

I see you sent this letter a while ago.

Yes, I was shocked by another letter I had received and had to take some time off from responding.

Of course, I am all better now and am doing quite well, thank you for asking.

Sincerely,

Nick Carraway

[ask-nick-carraway]

Hi Nick! I'm glad your friend liked my poem. I drew you a comic, too! Hope you like it.

Dear Matt,

That is a very interesting cartoon!Though I am not sure I recognize the art style. Is it contemporary?

Sincerely,

Nick Carraway

[ask-nick-carraway]

tell me son you ever been to vaseline alley with a drunk sailor

- petty anon

Dear Petty Anon,

I assure you that wherever I have been and with whom and under what circumstances is my own business, and that I will remain that way.

It is a shame as I have enjoyed your questions and would hate to have reason to stop answering them.

Sincerely,

Nick Carraway

[ask-nick-carraway]

Dear Nick,

I wrote you a poem! I hope that's alright with you.

Here goes nothing:

Bong-bong-bong (we good, we good, we good?) Bong-bong-bong-bong-bong (like a drum) Bong-bong-bong-bong-bong-bong-bong (haha, this is fire) Nigga, eat this ass like a plum (plum) This pussy tight like a nun (nun) Better chew it up like it's gum (gum) Then wipe your mouth when you done (okay) I'm hot like Nevada, pussy get popped, Piñata Bitch, I look like money (like money) You could print my face on a dollar Beat it up Beat it up Beat it up Beat it up Okay Five, four, three, two, one, lift off Honey, I'm home, shoes gettin' kicked off (uh) Every time I turn around, a bitch pissed off (ah-ha) Little dusty ass hoes need a lint brush (woo) You gon' settle down, you gon' live with him (what?) I don't even wanna post a pic with him (no) The bag he just bought me was a Goyard (Goyard) That ain't yo' nigga, he is both ours Pussy tight like a nun (nun) Countin' hundreds up with my thumb (thumb) I don't care where you from (from) Better beat this shit like a drum (okurr) Don't be talkin' shit like you know me (woo) I ride dick like a pony Girl, that nigga look like a brokey (Real hot girl shit) Go and fuck with his homie, he a- (ah) This ass sit like a stallion, all these wannabes my lil' ponies These hoes camped out in the comments, always talkin' like they know me (ayy) Thick bitches in a black truck, packed in Eat whoever in my way, Ms. Pacman Hermes, made a real big purchase Purse so big, had to treat it like a person Bad bitch (bad bitch) in real life (in real life) Show me real love, give a fuck about them likes ('bout them likes) Bitch tryna say I ain't fine? Oh, alright They know I'm thick like I'm eatin' beans with the rice Like lean over ice, got the real meat pies I be spillin' like my ass, out these jeans when they tight And the way they watch me, need to be monetized (ah) I'ma need a money bag if I sleep overnight Wait, wait, wait (hold up) Wait, wait (hold up) Hoes pop pills, but I'm the one they can't take (yeah) Hot girl shit, I'ma make somethin' shake I know the stiff hoes can't relate (ah) Shoot your shot like a free throw Just know this pussy ain't free though My BD is a Migo Bitch, your BD is a zero My back shots sound like bongos I ain't scared to admit, I'm a freak ho At least I'm gettin' my money Y'all hoes broke, pussy took more turns than a keyhole It did Like a bum I'ma throw it back like it's Thursday I got cake, I'm lit, it's my birthday (ah) Look I don't ride on my knees, bitch, I ride on my toes Big fat ass, it be eatin' up the thong Gotta garage full of foreign cars that I never drove A bitch couldn't school me with a student loan I'm so sexy, I could Met Gala in a robe I could body every look and I could body every pose (yes) Neck full of diamonds, yeah, I'm forever froze Will Cardi ever fall off? Bitch, we'll never know (whoa) Beat it up Wait Bitch, I'm hot (hot), like Nevada ('vada) Pussy get popped, Piñata (bap) Lookin', like money (cold) You could print my face on a dollar (okay) This pussy, Dominicana This pussy, Americana (ayy) Si tu quiere que te toma toma Bought a couple cribs on my own, I'm a owner Beat it up Real hot girl shit La Cardi (ah) I hope you like it! I worked really hard on it.

Sincerely,

Matt

Oi arsehole,

I just came to visit Nick for some important work related business and I find him on the bloody floor with this letter at his desk.

Is he? Is he dead?

Right. I kicked him a few times and he made a noise so I think he’s alive.

Still, that was a shite thing to do mate, scaring him like that.

Only I’m allowed do to that.

Bugger off,

Achava

[ask-nick-carraway]

Dear Nick,

I heard you used to write for your school newspaper in college. What did you write about?

Sincerely,

Matt

Dear Matt,

I was an editor who was occasionally made to work on sections of the paper that weren’t directly assigned to any other category. (Sports, current events, campus life etc.)

In schools such as Yale there was a great deal of pressure on student groups to make anything that was displayed publicly absolutely perfect.

This made my job as editor very stressful. The consequences of not catching one simple mistake were greatly exaggerated in order to make us more diligent.

Of course I still enjoyed working there and would absolutely do it again if I had the chance.

Sincerely,

Nick Carraway

[ask-nick-carraway]

hey nick! how’s your summer been?

it’s been extraordinarily rainy this year for me. hoping it doesn’t ruin marching band again this year, especially as it’s my last season with my school.

Dear Anonymous,

I have had what was probably my most interesting summer in all my life. Fortunately, I have some people here who helped me land on my feet.

Good luck with your marching band. I hope for your sake that the rain clears up in time. It’s raining here right now too. I think I heard thunder.

Sincerely,

Nick Carraway

[ask-nick-carraway]

did you actually kill anyone overseas or did they put you on paperwork duty

Dear Anonymous,

I never killed anyone during my time in France. I had trouble aiming the guns and so I became a medic instead.

I am honestly very glad to say that I saved more lives than I lost. And I think that that was where my life began to change for the better, if you can believe it.

Sincerely,

Nick Carraway

[ask-nick-carraway]

what do you think of airplanes

Dear Anonymous,

Many people I speak to are excited and enamored with the concept of aviation and the possibility to fly further advancement of this technology in the future.

However, during my time spent overseas in France, I learned that the British were using aircraft for intelligence gathering and other war related activities.

This has occasionally caused me to worry about the increased development of flight technology and the possibility of aircrafts being used for far more destructive military purposes.

David agrees with me as well, and he l knows more than I could.

Sincerely,

Nick Carraway