ask-the-loves-ask-the-legends

[ask-the-loves-ask-the-legends]

(The book with the stories begins to glow, and pages are once more added to it. When it's done, for once, no one speaks yet.)

OMNISCENT VOICE: Saerys, congrats, you can keep reading Lennox's route now.

SAERYS: I... Do not know why you are congratulating me!

OMNISCENT VOICE: Lmao sure you don't

(Questions can now be sent about Lennox's fanmade route up to season 3. The route can be read here)

[ask-the-loves-ask-the-legends]

I miss my wife, Tails. I miss her a lot.

ISEUL: None of us have tails!

[ask-the-loves-ask-the-legends]

(Once more, the book of stories begins to glow and grow as it's added onto. Only when it's done is when someone speaks.)

SAERYS: ...Lennox's story, then?

OMNISCENT VOICE: No.

SAERYS: Oh.

HELENA: Surely not another Jinhai-

(Helena approaches the book, and goes silent when she sees the next addition. She returns to the group entirely blank-faced.)

HELENA: ...It is the Witch Queen.

(Dead silence descends on the room.)

REINER: ...What.

ISEUL: ...That is a joke, right? Strange voice, tell us Helena is joking.

OMNISCENT VOICE: lol

SAERYS: ...From context, I think 'lol' stands for 'lack of lies'.

OMNISCENT VOICE: I mean... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

ALTEA: What sorcery?! How did you shrug even though you have no body?!

(...They keep complaining about me and the Witch Queen alternately so I'll cut off your view of them here. TL;DR though you can now ask them their thoughts about Witch Queen's fanroute's first season, available to read here.)

[ask-the-loves-ask-the-legends]

I don’t know if the MC is also here, but just a shoutout to her! She’s hilarious and underrated and way cooler than I would be in a similar isekai situation.

ALTEA: Unfortunately, no. She is not here.

ISEUL: I miss my wife!

REINER: I do hope she is doing well in my universe...

SAERYS: Whoever sent this message does have good taste, though.

OMNISCENT VOICE: ...You guys are all such simps. But anon is right, she's awesome.

[ask-the-loves-ask-the-legends]

(The book with everyone's stories begins to glow, and more pages are added to it as the pages flutter.)

OMNISCENT VOICE: Okay everyone, the Jinhai story now has been added onto in the book-

ISEUL: Out of my way!

(Iseul darts for the book before the omniscent voice can finish talking.)

OMNISCENT VOICE: ...Ok then. For all of you actually listening, you now have access to the full first two seasons of Jinhai's story. People who send asks can send questions about what you all think about the events up to the season 2 finale. Have fun.

[ask-the-loves-ask-the-legends]

Wood fired pizza, how will pizza get a job now?

REINER: I do not know this 'Pizza' person, but if you direct them to me, I will look into giving them a job-

HELENA: While your kindness serves as a beacon to all, I believe my love told me of this 'pizza' before. It is a food, not a person. This is another joke.

REINER: You do not know that!

SAERYS: My lord, please... Who would name their child after a food?

ISEUL: To be fair, this 'chicago' land holds many strange things. To name their children after food would not be the oddest we have heard.

[ask-the-loves-ask-the-legends]

Whose a better shot: Reiner or Iseul?

REINER: Well, I'd have to say Iseul, personally.

ISEUL: My lord, please, could we not discuss that a bit more, or perhaps hold a contest-

REINER: After all, he's had much more time to practice than I!

ISEUL: I am not that much older than you!

OMNISCENT VOICE: You're literally centuries older than him bro.

ISEUL: I am not your brother!

[ask-the-loves-ask-the-legends]

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? - waywardVerdict

Iseul: Well, that depends on the size and strength of the woodchuck, as well as how large each piece of wood-

Altea: Iseul, no, I... Believe this was a jest.

Iseul: What?! But I was going to draw diagrams!

[ask-the-loves-ask-the-legends]

Question for everyone if that’s alright: is there a particular reason why you won’t let Iseul do your hair? Mine is impossible and I would love the assistance (if that’s not too rude to say)

HELENA: I do not believe I ever had this offer, nor the chance to turn it down. If I had, my reply would likely be along the lines of wartime not offering much chance to sit down and allow such things - I do not actually mind having my hair styled if there is time to do it properly.

ISEUL: Wait, then can I do your hair?! You will let me?!

ALTEA: Be careful, Helena... Iseul would sit with you for days on end if you let him. He gets a bit overexcited about trying things that he cannot with his own hair...

HELENA: I do not mind. We have not much else to do in this strange realm aside from waiting to answer these messages and read our own tales. Come, Iseul, let us sit away from the others.

ISEUL: Helena, has anyone ever told you that you are an angel?

REINER: Well, you did try to warn her, Altea...

SAERYS: I am suddenly glad that this realm has changed my appearance to my old, short hair. I would hate to be in Helena's place right now...

[ask-the-loves-ask-the-legends]

Question for Iseul and Saerys: what are your thoughts on your enemies getting their own routes?

(The ask flutters down before them in the form of a note.)

(Saerys jumps back, horrified by the sudden appearance of the paper.)

SAERYS: What is that?!

ALTEA: Where did it come from, more importantly?

HELENA: Be careful, it could be dangerous... Shall I try and-?

OMNISCENT VOICE: Fuck no you should not, I won't have you destroying the first ask this blog got! Just answer it! Talk to the air, I promise the person will hear.

SAERYS: That is very strange, you know. But, fine...

(They read the note. Everyone else looks to Iseul and Saerys for their answer)

SAERYS: In my case, to see Lennox with his own... Route, as you put it, was... An experience. What we have is incomplete, however I am already able to see that in this tale, Lennox has changed for the better due to the love of... I believe she is referred to as 'Colette' in the version you would all have access to?

SAERYS: However, to imagine this story with the Lennox of my world is... Difficult. I have been pretending that it is someone else who shares his name.

ALTEA: Is that why you have read through it three times already?

SAERYS: I-! You did not need to tell them that part!

ALTEA: You clearly had no intentions to!

ISEUL: In my case, I care more for the story than the participants. I demand we receive Jinhai's next part, before my hair falls out from stress! How DARE we be left with such a cliffhanger?!

[ask-the-loves-ask-the-legends]

The Beginning; Part Three

(Hours later, everyone has calmed down, and has read over everyone's stories within the book. However...)

HELENA: I will admit to August and Alain having stories within this book being expected - the... Voice, it said as much. However...

ISEUL: Why do Lennox and Jinhai have stories within this book... And why are they incomplete?

OMNISCENT VOICE: Well fuck you, too, alright?! I've been BUSY! Let's see you try writing a route for a game that doesn't exist except in recordings!

ISEUL: ...I do not know what any of those words mean, and I do not wish to know.

ALTEA: More importantly... My story...

HELENA: You as well, then?

ALTEA: Yes... My story actually happened for me.

HELENA: As mine happened for me...

REINER: As did mine...

SAERYS: And mine.

ISEUL: Mine as well.

(Silence falls over the group as they consider the implications of this)

OMNISCENT VOICE: Alright, I think yall could go around and around about this, so I'll just tell you. First off, I brought you here. Second, you're here to answer questions from people on tumblr. Third, no, I won't explain what tumblr is. The end.

ISEUL: Wait, what?!

SAERYS: You cannot just-!

Asks Are Now Open!!!

[ask-the-loves-ask-the-legends]

The Beginning; Part Two

SAERYS: Perhaps I would be more at ease if I had come here by my own will... Does anyone have any ideas-

OMNISCENT VOICE: Hi! Yeah, hi, yes, please, your attention please!

SAERYS: ...What was that?

ISEUL: Helena, do please tell me that you were trying to scare us...

HELENA: Unfortunately not, no.

ALTEA: Is someone else here with us?!

REINER: Well, I do not see August...

OMNISCENT VOICE: Yeah, no, he's not gonna be here. Neither's Alain. I really didn't like their routes, so. Anyway...

(From one corner of the room, a book that everyone previously did not notice begins to glow, and its pages begin to flip on its own)

OMNISCENT VOICE: This book will have each of your stories. It should explain to one another what your respective situations are.

HELENA: I am not sure that I-

ALTEA: Oh, what manner of spell was cast here? This seems to be a truly interesting book, almost as if it is alive-

HELENA: Altea! Why are you already reading it?!

ALTEA: Because I am curious, of course!

(The two spellcasters fight for the book, while the men simply look on warily, ready to fight if it turns out that the book is dangerous)

OMNISCENT VOICE: This... Might take a while...

........

Asks Are Not Yet Open

[ask-the-loves-ask-the-legends]

The Beginning; Part One

(.......)

(The library rumbles, and several portals glow and appear in the air...)

ALTEA: Ah! What on earth-?!

(Altea stumbles through one of the portals, and like a wave, others follow, each through a different portal)

ISEUL: Ohh, my head...

HELENA: What manner of magic...?!

REINER: Why does this look like the library in my castle...?

SAERYS: A good question, among many others...

(The portals close before any of them can try to return through them, and they are left standing in bewilderment...)

....

Asks Are Not Open Yet