askcohenchang - Tumblr blog

[askcohenchang]

Yeah. The color along would have put me off. Green cocktail? Yeah, I'd much rather stick with something less...radiation colored. Doge? Like...the old meme? Of that dog?

Yes, you heard right. I don't know what kind of drugs they were on but I'll give them credit for the fact that it was the craziest drink order I've had in quite some time. Wait, a what cocktail?

[askcohenchang]

My grandparents - on my dad's side at least - don't really get me. It can be kinda painful. My grandma on my mom's side is a little like that, but it's a little misguided. She keeps buying me copies of Cosmo and pink things.

Hanging out with your grandparents was... bad? I barely see mine, but when I do, I can get away with just about anything. My father hates it, says I'm spoiled. But I would be lying if I said I didn't take full advantage of it.

[askcohenchang]

My parents went on their anniversary vacation last Thanksgiving and I was stuck with my grandparents for the week, so I'd take the opportunity to sit around and do nothing. The time alone could be really nice.

With my father landing a new business deal, he and my mother will be away on vacation to celebrate over Thanksgiving, which marks that first one I've ever spent alone. What does one do when not tied to familial obligations?

[askcohenchang]

The what? That person must be stuck in 2015 because Shrek memes are so old school internet! That would be like asking for a Doge Cocktail.

What is with all these weird drinks that people that try to get me to make? What happened to the good old whiskey and coke? I’ve never heard of a Shrek piss before and I’m not sure I want to know why someone would want to drink it anyway.

[askcohenchang]

Cash app? Wouldn't I then have to send them like...sexy pictures of me? I don't really want to do that! I was looking for an actual nice date, not to just be someone's goth hookup, ya'know?

I don't see the problem, shoulda asked them the cash app you. Tinder is an easy, quick cash grab. Men will pay big money for a "big or small-titty goth girlfriend.

[askcohenchang]

...I plead the fifth. Rachel and Kitty. Just for the rival show choir enemies to lovers of it all....

@askcohenchang replied to your post:

Not true! I do NOT write RPF! Sure, I read it, but I do not write it!

Oh, so you DO read about Lima residents doing the nasty? No judgment, let your freak flag fly. Who’s your fav ship?

[askcohenchang]

favorite vampire media?

....What kind of question is this? Are you making fun of me? It feels like you might be making fun of me...

[askcohenchang]

What was the last thing you read?

This fic called 'This Is Gospel'. And, get this, it wasn't a Twilight fic! It was a Robert Pattinson x Reader RPF, but still! I'm branching out!

[askcohenchang]

if a tv show offered you a thousand dollars to give you a full body makeover and the only catch is you have to keep dressing that way for six months, would you do it?

It would depend on the makeover I guess. I like the way I dress, it's one of the few things about myself I do like. so I don't know if I'd need one.

[askcohenchang]

Tina had never felt more anxious. All of these people around, drinking and talking loud and Tina had no clue how to go about being included in it all. She'd edge close to a group and feel herself go ignored straight away. And she'd tried so hard to dress up nice and everything, but so far two separate people had thought she was a waiter.

So when Tina heard Dottie call her name, she felt herself relax. "Dottie, hey!", she said, trying to play it cool. She had a reputation of Super Cool Awesome Fic Author to maintain with her. "Thanks! The Troubletones did really well too, you sounded great!" Tina had her jaw on the ground for the majority of the Troubletones' set in reality, she had no clue Dottie could perform like that. "And it was kinda a brainstorm between me and Ryder, and the rest of the group helped piece stuff together."

Dottie hadn't been expecting to see so many of her classmates at Sebastian's black tie party, but she was grateful to be surrounded by people she actually knew.

She'd already connected with a few Troubletones that night, the group riding the high of their recent performance at Invitationals, but to say that any one group had been better than another wouldn't have been realistic. New Directions had been just as good and they'd even had a better balance of people than Dottie had been expecting, given the whole... Rachel Berry of it all.

And there was one person in particular that she felt it was important to call out.

"Tina!" she greeted, wandering over to where the girl was stationed. "I didn't get to say it before, but you were really good at Invitationals. Whose idea was it to do a Panic! at the Disco song?"

@askcohenchang

[askcohenchang]

that's a smart choice. no one is safe on dating apps it seems; even if you're non-binary you're gonna go through it. which i guess makes me feel a little better, as horrible as that sounds. that it's not just because i'm a girl but because other people are just weird.

my personal insta? not super active. i'm super active on my fan accounts though.

i wish it was a nightmare, but it was pretty real. turned me away from dating apps in general, quite honestly. i think i still have a tinder account? i have not opened it in ages. it's not that great of a catalogue unless you're willing to fly off to argentina or belgium to meet up.

if you feel more comfortable online though, i can only advice you to get picky with matches. or, and this is a tougher idea, put yourself out there more. how active are you on insta?

[askcohenchang]

...Well, no one I guess. So that's kind of you, I suppose. Boobs are pretty great across the board so that makes sense.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Who says I discriminate on different size boobs?

[askcohenchang]

oh god, that sounds like a nightmare. i don't know how you do it. i just thought it'd be good because i cannot meet people in real life either. i just freeze up and go red, it's so embarrassing. i mean, it's a little better now that i don't stutter, but i really thought my chronic online-ness would help me out. it did not.

ah, sweet summer child. unfortunately, dating apps always entail the hardships of dealing with men. you wouldn't last a second in grindr, i'll tell you that much. i felt the need to burn my phone alltogether ten minutes in, just held back because i was in no place to afford another one. terrifying experience.

[askcohenchang]

TINA COHEN-CHANG @ SEBASTIAN SMYTHE'S 21ST

[askcohenchang]

Really? Huh...Well, I might have to work on that after I finish up the current fic I'm working on!

Tina, that is a genius story idea. I would absolutely read it. I'm a big fan of a forbidden romance type story.

[askcohenchang]

FMK: Edward, Jacob, Jasper

Easiest thing ever. Fuck Jacob, Marry Edward (that way I can fuck him after we get married), and kill the confederate. I'm a Jasper anti.