askthewizardpi - Tumblr blog

[askthewizardpi]

Hey harry, im havin some trouble with a magical intruder, can i hire your services to help catch em. Honestly i don know how dey gettin passed the giant seven foot tall lizard alien...but ya know.

I'm kinda busy these days. I can give you a few numbers to call for help, if I can't get back to you in a couple of weeks.

If not, ward the house.

[askthewizardpi]

marley shelton from 11th hour as murphy, yeah or nay?

Ooc: I've learned not to get involved in casting calls. But if you think shed make a good murphy then cool.

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What if.... you were suddenly to find yourself without your Mantle?

I'd be in a wheelchair, or dead. Either way is not a desirable outcome.

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*Harry, Thomas, and Murphy hanging off the side of a cliff*

Butters: Who’s hurt? What do you need?

Harry: We need rope.

Butters: Rope. Anything else?

Harry: Yeah, three double cheeseburgers with everything.

Thomas: No onions on mine!

Murphy: And an apple turnover!

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The early days…

Murphy: Honestly, you are the most boorish, pig-headed man I’ve ever met.

Harry: Hey, lady. I’ve seen the high-born boys your ex-husband hangs out with. Heh. I’m the only man you’ve ever met. *he turns to leave*

Murphy: *hits him in the back of the head with an empty coffee cup*

Harry: *slowly turns and picks up a balled up piece of paper and hits her in the forehead with it*

Rawlins: *to an S.I. cop beside him* Five on Murphy.

Murphy: You…egotistical–

Harry: You spoiled–

Murphy: *starts chucking office supplies at him* –disrespectful, pretentious–

Harry: *starts ducking objects* –deluded–

Murphy: –pompous, self-centered–

Harry: –high and mighty–

Murphy: –ungrateful, impossible, insufferable–

Harry: At least I’m not repressed!

Murphy: Repressed?! I’ll show you repressed! *picks up a chair*

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Molly: Man, being 5'8" is tough.

Harry: Damn this is so true. I remember in the fourth grade, I couldn’t reach anything.

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Meave: Happy Birthday, Harry.

Harry: *opens box* This…. This is your signed headshot.

Meave: *Leaving* You’re welcomeee.

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*Thomas, Harry, and Butters working on an elaborate plan to escape a locked room*

Harry: I tell you what, boys. We are incredibly clever.

Murphy: *opens the door behind them*

Harry: …. How did you do that?

Murphy: It was unlocked.

Harry: Right.

Murphy: Hang on. Three of you in one cell and none of you thought to try the door?

All three:….

Thomas: That’s supposed to be locked.

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Bob: Boss, I’m not trying to be rude… but you died.

Harry: I know, I was there.

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Harry: *yelling at outsiders* Come on, look at me! No plan, no backup, no weapons worth a damn, oh, and something else I don’t have: anything to lose! So, if you’re sitting out there in your silly little ships with all your silly little guns, and you’ve got any plans on taking Demonreach tonight, just remember who’s standing in your way! Remember every black day I ever stopped you, and then, and then, do the smart thing!

Harry: Let somebody else try first.

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**Murphy is being held captive by Nicodemus*

Harry: I told you to go right.

Murphy: Really? Now?

Harry: You let her go!

Nicodemus: Ah, the boyfriend.

Harry: Like to think of myself as a Denarian-killing, long term booty call. Let. Her. Go.

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Merlin: There is no Black Council.

*Harry’s Point of View*: Quest Added: Find the Black Council.

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Mortimer: I think I’ve gotten over my fear of ghosts.

Harry: That’s the spirit!

Mortimer: Oh fuck where?

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Harry: *Indicating he plans to stay on Demonreach after Cold Days away from Maggie* She has everything she could ever ask for. And it is better this way – because I suck at this. Bad shit happens to people I care about. You understand me?

Michael: Then she’ll be fine

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Morgan: I’m old enough to know that a longer life isn’t always a better one. In the end you just get tired. Tired of the struggle. Tired of losing everyone that matters to you. Tired of watching everything turn to dust. If you live long enough, Dresden, the only certainty left is that you’ll end up alone.

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*after Harry returns to the White Council*

Young Warden: Nice Harry Dresden costume, but your scar is on the wrong side.

Harry: The scar is not on the wrong side!