ast-heljar

[ast-heljar]

Trying to get ready for this trip to see my partners grandmother, because we likely wont get another chance to see her before she dies (she is... stable? but... not okay) while also grieving a good friend who died last night, literally the night before the trip... the trip about processing death...

it sucks, actually.

Its hard to keep organized while crying like every half hour.

And my partner, who does not handle death in the healthiest manner keeps trying to like... fix? the grief? and I know they mean well, but ??? it hasnt been 24 hours yet. please let me sit with my sadness right now. Im not ready for anything else. Theres nothing to do, nothing to fix. Just grief to sit in for a little bit.

[ast-heljar]

Our friend passed away last night after a 3 week battle against covid.

Ive had a lot of bad days at work, but my supervisor delivering that bad news is probably the worst.

Im really gonna miss him

Hello all!

My partner and I are back to work. We did manage to sort ourselves ourselves out and as of tomorrow night will no longer be in financial crisis. We really appreciate anyone who reblogged our help post, you were great.

Altho I am going to delete it now, and welcome anyone who reblogged it to do the same, I have one small request for anyone who see this.

We got covid from a friend and coworker. Altho we are vaccinated, and so spared the worst of it it, he isnt. He is now in the ICU. Please send him good thoughts and or prayers. Not only is our friend whom we care very much about, hes also really helped us out when we were in trouble. The world needs good people like him in it.

Thanks

[ast-heljar]

Hello all!

My partner and I are back to work. We did manage to sort ourselves ourselves out and as of tomorrow night will no longer be in financial crisis. We really appreciate anyone who reblogged our help post, you were great.

Altho I am going to delete it now, and welcome anyone who reblogged it to do the same, I have one small request for anyone who see this.

We got covid from a friend and coworker. Altho we are vaccinated, and so spared the worst of it it, he isnt. He is now in the ICU. Please send him good thoughts and or prayers. Not only is our friend whom we care very much about, hes also really helped us out when we were in trouble. The world needs good people like him in it.

Thanks

[ast-heljar]

The children of Loki

[ast-heljar]

The thing about “kill pedophiles” and “castrate rapists” and all that is that it’s a flat-out reactionary sentiment that gains a lot of traction in Leftist circles and it goes practically unchallenged because anyone who does challenge it can be accused of advocating rape or sex with children.

[ast-heljar]

[ast-heljar]

Denmark by Nairb Eybehcs

[ast-heljar]

vieitnamese farmers harvest water chestnuts in fields of blowing waves of grass (x)

[ast-heljar]

One of these days I'll talk about how Norse Heathenry is mirepresented to promote an extremely colonized and distinctly American interpretation of masculinity.

[ast-heljar]

Dreamt of Loki last sleep.

Started out as some kind of work dream that I barely recall, and then I some how ended up outdoors in a park-like woodsy area. Body of water, manicured grass, numerous old but well spaced trees with a woodsy boundary.

And numerous like, wooden statues of the goods. Tho, when things got strangely intense for some reason that even dream logic didnt elaborate on, the statues didnt stay on the ground. As seems to be a theme in god related dreams, I fell over, and a number of statues appeared above me in the sky.

The 1st was the O, to whom I was all: ahaha, hi, youre here -aggressively avoids eye contact with a floating wooden statue- which is ultimately how I also noticed the statues for Tyr and Thor. There MANY others, for sure, I just simply didnt have time to focus on them all...

Because not long after fall over this very kind lile 10 year old child came to my rescue and took me over to the Loki statue. He was saying something about mushrooms, and Loki's wooden statue was partially carved out of a tree. I imagine they all were, of course, being that they were huge, but because my brain can ONLY conjure up pine trees in close proximity (grew up climbing Ponderosa Pine) so thats what this was.

The kid is short, so he looks around the base and I start climbing the tree-statue base a bit and in a hole in the tree I find a REALLY BIG growing mushroom cap of unknown variety. So the kid and I keep climbing up until we get to the shrine part of the statue.

Which is huge because the statue is huge. Anyway, its a big oval metal plate of some kind surround aesthetically from thr front with a few candles. Obviously the answer is throw the mushroom on the metal, burn it, light the candles.

Trying to do any of that while hanging off a front was difficult for me, but the back had much more platform the was clearly intended to be walked upon, so I told the kid I was going around the back. During my trip to the back I also found actual fire wood, etc.

So I climb up the back and the back if the platform is in disarray with some trash, which I start to clean up. As Im cleaning I find a sword! I know where to buy that sword online actually... Anyway, the kid says obviously we found that because we found the mushroom. I have to use the sword to scare off some mild threats from the statue.

We do manage to start a fire, burn the mushroom. I do have to light most of the candles with a dud sparkler firework after which I FINALLY find someones lighter in my cleaning. Turns out theres also a lot of dramatics involved with getting the shrine started because its designed to look like its smoking furiously regardless of whats actually on the metal plate.

What does this have to do with anything? nothing. it was just really vivid so Im writing it down. I will clean it up later.

[ast-heljar]

and now that ive made my extremely rare contribution to the community im gonna scuttle off. If anyone wants me Ill be on the other blog dissecting my depression with creative writing.

[ast-heljar]

To continue the last thought in a less psa manner re:the horse incident. It isnt just a panphobic take its a transphobic take, specifically an NBphobic take, but this just brings us back to the same convo we were having nearly a decade ago... The man, woman, or alien bit I was talking about. It sounds good, catchy and fun except it reduces anyone who doesnt fit inside the gender binary to "alien" and "non-human" and "other" and ultimately "monster." This is obnoxious enough, but at least it wasnt "animal" and "less than human" if that makes sense.

So, ultimately the statement puts down two groups of people, one of which its supposedly trying to support.

If applying to Loki, its like the perfect shit soup. Honestly. In trying to defend a characters position it literally weakens everything it stands for with an immense amount of collateral damage.

Myth Loki is shapeshifts and mothers quite frequently in the myths. Pick ANYTHING else, yeah.

[ast-heljar]

Yeah, this for sure. Thanks, Eddie.

I had a really one track mind when I was writing the original post, so I def could have used better words. When I said "various levels of consent" i meant imo none, but I didnt necessarily think others taking it as a story at face value was necessarily malicious either given the source comes mainly from outside heathen circles.

I don't, personally, think it can interpreted in any other way than rape, though, so again. I am just asking that people think before posting and error on the side of compassion. I see a number of these posts going around in what appears to defense of a bi/pan character. If your goal is to help you need to find a different method, because this isnt it.

There are novels to be written on the Bi/pan/NB/queerphobia bubbles bursting because of the MCULoki show and Im not interested in getting into it. I couldnt care less about the MCU over all. I do however wanna point out something some of y'all with the hot "obviously hes pan, myth-Loki fucked a horse" take havent considered... Or maybe you have and you can do me the favor of blocking me, thank.

Y'all

I know myth Loki got it on to varying degrees of consent with a horse of seemingly higher sentience than your average midgard animal... But holy shit myth Loki isnt pansexual because he fucked a horse, and y'all equating pansexuality to beastiality is beyond gross.

I really do see what point you are trying to make, I do, but that clever one liner isnt actually as great out of context as you might think. Hel, Im really hesitant to even give anyone that much benefit of doubt here, because I feel like it might honestly be too generous for the cesspool that is tumblr. If you didnt know, now you do-- You arent doing any real human being any favors by making that kind connection.

I thought we had moved passed the 2012 "Man woman or alien" bit, but honestly... Id prefer that over the "Man woman or horse" y'all are trying to pass around. Holy hel. Do better.

[ast-heljar]

There are novels to be written on the Bi/pan/NB/queerphobia bubbles bursting because of the MCULoki show and Im not interested in getting into it. I couldnt care less about the MCU over all. I do however wanna point out something some of y'all with the hot "obviously hes pan, myth-Loki fucked a horse" take havent considered... Or maybe you have and you can do me the favor of blocking me, thank.

Y'all

I know myth Loki got it on to varying degrees of consent with a horse of seemingly higher sentience than your average midgard animal... But holy shit myth Loki isnt pansexual because he fucked a horse, and y'all equating pansexuality to beastiality is beyond gross.

I really do see what point you are trying to make, I do, but that clever one liner isnt actually as great out of context as you might think. Hel, Im really hesitant to even give anyone that much benefit of doubt here, because I feel like it might honestly be too generous for the cesspool that is tumblr. If you didnt know, now you do-- You arent doing any real human being any favors by making that kind connection.

I thought we had moved passed the 2012 "Man woman or alien" bit, but honestly... Id prefer that over the "Man woman or horse" y'all are trying to pass around. Holy hel. Do better.

[ast-heljar]

@loptrcoptr so npc overhaul mods?

[ast-heljar]

Nah i think you are on to something. As usual im not articulate enough to help pin it down, but I see it.

I FEEL like its just a continuation of men are evil TERF rhetoric mixing in a pot with everything else. Probably people getting too caught up in defending labels, forgetting about trans men as usual, a lack of queer history, etc etc. Devided community...

Sorry I cant make the words go tho, its the migraine meds.

Biphobia, panphobia, acephobia, etc. are never okay. But like…I’m starting to grow suspicious how, when it comes to unconfirmed potential M/M relationships, people are always quick to jump on the bandwagon that, no, we shouldn’t root for the M/M ship to be explicitly canon, because then mspec and aspec people would be left out! We should be content with any queer representation!

Yet on the exceedingly rare occasions where a canon M/M ship does happen in a remotely popular franchise, it’s always, literally without fail, trashed as problematic or fetishistic or otherwise The Worst Thing Ever. Either way, it’s impossible to ship two men without being branded as a terrible person.

I’m beginning to believe it’s all just garden variety homophobia dressed up with social justice terminology. Maybe I’m just following entirely the wrong people. IDK.