audiodramatist

[audiodramatist]

A rookie mistake is getting out of things by claiming a grandparent died. You can do that a maximum of four times per person, and that's assuming maximum social atomization, where nobody you know is likely to talk to each other and compare notes and realize that five of your grandmothers have died of carbon monoxide poisoning in the last three months. The winning play? Dead Uncles. You can have any number of dead uncles, because who knows how many siblings your parents have? You don't even need to keep the stories straight because if you slip up you can claim it was two separate uncle deaths. You can repeat names, even, one on each side of your family. Uncles often die in memorable ways so you can get flamboyant with the specifics. Motorcycle accidents, firework explosions, prostate cancer, rottweiler training mishap. It won't be that weird that you aren't particularly torn up about it. Maybe you didn't like your Uncle

[audiodramatist]

fresh, clean no-terf version for reblogs!

Your mom and aunts aren’t on tumblr.  Please warn them about this as well. 

[audiodramatist]

My two yr old is looking through a book about prehistoric art and she saw a picture of those cave painting of hands and she held up her own and said "hand!" And I gotta be honest. That hit

[audiodramatist]

i want devices that are functional and hardy and i want them to last and fuck the rest of the shit i dont need. my ds and 3ds can lie in sleep mode for months if not years and i can pop them open and they've still got two or three bars left. my old phones in high school could go days without a charge. if i leave my nintendo switch on the floor for a few days doing absolutely fuck all nothing i will turn it on and it will cry to me mother i am dying. i am dying mother. and i tell him he'll never be half the man his brother was and he can't hear me because he's dead

[audiodramatist]

this is the sluttiest thing he's ever done I'm sorry. why can he only flirt like some exotic bird

[audiodramatist]

This is so funny to me. They just woke up one day to this in their emails. They didn't ask for it. They didn't even want it. And yet it's in the episode anyway. Dugga doo is inescapable.

[audiodramatist]

If you have Spotify reblog this and tag what your number one song on your “on repeat” playlist is.

[audiodramatist]

how it feels to stop tossing and turning and get up to piss

[audiodramatist]

there was debate about who would dip who, so i obliged

[audiodramatist]

Couples who are also best friends save me.....save me couples who are also best friends....

[audiodramatist]

fun fact nate stevenson liked and retweeted my she ra art when i was first posting it, and we have both come out and changed our names since then lol (i was stoked)

[audiodramatist]

he’s crazy for this

[audiodramatist]

[audiodramatist]

in their girlnap era.

part of the birthday gift for @maria-tries 🫶

[audiodramatist]

Catra just enjoying being married to this dork ~ Join my Patreon for exclusive content. #catradora #sheraandtheprincessesofpower

[audiodramatist]

[audiodramatist]

and i present to you, messy lesbians