aybi-writes

[aybi-writes]

To protect herself she closed her heart and threw away the concept of love.

[aybi-writes]

what if i never met her and i met you first, would I be bold enough to love you despite the fact that you are a man?

sincerely yours, sky

-an excerpt from So I'm Into You (2019), my first ever bl novel

[aybi-writes]

i hope you realize one day how badly you've treated me, how you've hurt me despite giving you my heart.

[aybi-writes]

The garden of the palace were full of roses. Some are with thorns, some don't. A tiny little blue rose at the center of the garden draws the attention of all the other plants, as it's color resembles the clearest of pale blue skies. They called him Aqua. It is indeed very pretty, but Aqua lacked a simple characteristic of every rose in the garden. It has no fragrance.

Despite having no fragrance, Pierre, a colorless rose, continued to love him. "As long as you're here with me, I'll be fine" he said. But the anxious Aqua could not bear the possibilities, in their future. Her mind was full of what ifs...

"We will only hold each other back, don't you see? The whole garden disapprove of us."

"You lack color, I lack fragance. We're not normal. We don't fit in. We can't complete each other, time will only make it unbearable for us."

And so, Aqua left Pierre and left the garden. Without telling anyone. She ventured the outside world, being a rose without fragrance. She had been away for too long. Like a domestic pet finally unleashed from his cage.

Met too many roses, as well as different flowers. But the hole in her heart wasn't filled. She kept searching... But the farther she gets, the more it became out of her reach.

Pierre crossed her mind, and remembered how they act so comfortably with each other. It is full of struggle, but they made it. So she went back to the garden as fast as she could...

But when she reached the familiar garden, she could not find him at all. All the roses smiled at her sadly.

"Pierre wilted. He is cutted and burnt. A single defective flower has no use for them."

True. Pierre's pot is empty. It's soil is dried up... Sign that it hasn't been watered lately. Life is surely cruel. It does not wait for you to realize things, and maybe when you did...it's already too late.

They could have completed each other. By accompanying each other, and fill up the gaps within themselves, they should have been happier. She completed him, but he is not enough for her. She needs reassurance. It ended in such tragedy, the blue rose wept day and night. She continues to water the empty pot.. whispering to herself, "You'll grow soon, I will always be here... Waiting..."

As if whispering to a non-existent companion.

Day and night she watered the pot diligently, as if waiting for her lover which decided to rest peacefully after all the tireless chasing. She hummed next to it, whispered it songs, and say all the sweet words , whispering it through the wind... The wind carries it to the sky, lost in the never-ending mosaic of dazzling stars.

[aybi-writes]

I stared at the fearless sky, which was devoid of stars. Looking at them makes me feel lonely.

Your eyes were sparkling the day you kissed me under those pretty sparkling stars. You made your promise beneath them.

If my eyes never made your heart skip a beat again

if your eyes didn't shine brightly for me

If you forgot how ecstatic we were at the start,

the promised you swore under the sky

Were they lost with the stars too?