at a lesbian bar wearing a vampire costume: I vish to eat your puvsy *my plastic fangs slip out of my mouth and into someone’s drink* *I cry and pull the fire alarm before running out*
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no one's doin it like him, man
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fucked up how true crime almost always means rape/killing/kidnapping shit. what i lf i wanted true crime about the #1 best walmart shoplifter.
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Message to all Americans: you BETTER NOT have brought BURGER in your SUITCASE
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I got too excited while playing chess and told my opponent that I was going to slit his throat and slaughter him like a hog. something to work on for next time
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