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Final Grad

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MED FORMAT

Here I had the very original start of the project, and I had used it to project the moving image onto the studio wall. I then set up the Hasselblad in the studio and took pictures of the projection slowed down. I loved the natural distortion it gave. I processed the film myself on campus then for time reasons I digitally made stop motion and sills with them. I also did several experiments in regards to making lyrics or words bt puncturing the image then putting them on a lightbox like David Bertelli the artist. 

I loved the extra aesthetic it gave and the extra grungey layer I had created naturally.

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The male gaze theory. Extract from my dissertation.

The Male Gaze Theory The theory of male gaze was about displaying the affiliation distinctive of a specific set of communal settings. According to Wolf, the beauty conception related to women was because of institutional and institution power of men (Smelik, 2016). Women in the society were considered as to be attractive of which Mulvey thinks that it has nothing to do with women because society thinks of them as viewing or seeking pleasure, which was a depiction limiting her status to a provoking sensual existence. In a broader sense, to incorporates, views relating to the unconscious, conscious interactions with humans sensual, and subjectivity. According to a Freudian psychoanalyst, one of the significant notions of the drive, which was essential to watch was the scopic drive (Smelik, 2016). Despite that, some writers considered the posing and viewing pleasure within the children from their early ages because of the pointing directions from their society which finds its considerations, than those who are born blind. According to Laura Mulvey, a former film theorist showed her concerns with the display within a picture, and how the audiences might get attracted towards it because of the general conception of the male gaze. Although her primary concerns are mostly related to the characters discussing in the films, one can inter-relate her conceptions with generalized photographic cinematography (Smelik, 2016). Similarly, her argument is applicable and vital in several aspects like female photographers of today’s society. From her ideas, one might establish a masculine and enriched continuing opinions of “...a world well-arranged by voluptuous disparity” as “...females are concurrently watched at and showed, with their advent coded for erotic impact and strong visual so that they can be supposed to signify as an object upon which one looked.” The author believes that the pleasure of viewing was break up into two forms of female/passive and male/active, which was itself an aggregation with the Berger’s opinion of women appear and men act (Smelik, 2016). She further suggested the camera lens was masculine and descriptive pictures had a prurient propensity as cinema-goers typically viewed the awning in a darkened chamber. The concept of the voyeurism and male gaze usually refers to the desire of watching while not being seen as dangerous but powerful connotative of evil, and can be pinched as an equivalent to the “Panopticon gaze.”

I can apply the male gaze to my work, as this is the foundations to all the point I try to make. I can explore my identity as a female whilst keeping the male gaze in mind 

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A critical reflection. Jenna Whyman.

I’m nearing the end of all my edits and my deadline is in sight. When I look back to the beginning of my education I would never have thought I would be graduating at 40. but then I have never done things in the correct order.

When I started to study photography 4 years ago, I had never used a camera, only fun cameras and cheap phone ones. I walked into an interview with a portfolio made up of Instagram pictures from my old smashed up Samsung. My teachers saw something and took a chance. I have had the hardest time in my personal life since starting the course but it's kept me going and given me a direction I had never had before.

My strongest work is about messages. Over the last four years I have covered domestic violence, homelessness, male suicide, self-harm, sexual abuse, detachment and therapy, this is truly where I can create. the deeper I feel it, the better I can tell the story. but that comes at a price, as I use photography as art and I create it, it’s so much of me that I can be left feeling wide open and vulnerable. But. This is art. I realise I have an ethical standing and if I want to put my work out there, I am always aware of that. For example, whilst my exhibition is really rather tame, it still has inpatriate material, so this projection will need an 18+ . The whole point of my body of work is to highlight the addictive behaviours and online presence that we are all exposed to. The very fact that they were intentionally created to inflict addictive behaviour. That as a recovering alcoholic with addictive tendencies I became sucked into the world of online dating. The endless messages, pictures, like a conveyor belt of nonsense. I wanted to use a range of multimedia and photographic techniques to simulate how many layers and what was the meaning behind the images of myself. How complex is the one selfie you send to an admirer. What was I really thinking when I sent it. Sure. My lipstick was on. But what was my eyes saying? How did it make me feel? The text was to represent the responses and the callous side of anonymous messaging. And to highlight how sad and lonely it all really is

The message behind it is something that younger girls and guys who are sending out themselves and giving themselves away is something I would like to see being talked about In schools and colleges, how addictive these apps are, how sinister that they have read my life through my phone.

The stop motion I am so passionate about is something I very much fell into easily. my mind works at 100 miles an hour, I can never commit to one image. I have always been in love with the moment before the click and the moment after, when no one is expecting that straight lens and portraying an image. which is something we are doing more and more but instead of posing for a snapshot, people are posing for a life, what they are portraying online, what they want you to see. so, this was initially something I wanted to look at. I loved the freedom of exploring multi media. I literally used every platform I could, analogue, slide shows, medium format, translucent film, digital and of course media for my exhibition. I really like the idea of an image, whilst classed as low res, can finish up with so many natural layers. So, whilst my images are aesthetically low res, I would argue they are far more technical than the perfect studio shots that are tweaked to death on photoshop.

I also feel as an artist very responsible for what message and vibe I put out there. I have teenage children. I want to pass on the message that digital manipulation is not ok. I hate to see someone’s portrait edited so it’s not them. This does not make you a good photographer. This makes you part of the problem. The industry is over saturated with images so unrealistic that I don’t want my children growing up thinking it’s a real, obtainable lifestyle. It’s not. So, all my photography is from a realistic place. My small business I have built for myself is called We Don’t Do Poses. My catch line is, we love real. Real is beautiful. It should be celebrated more.

 Looking at my practice I can always improve and learn, I have a huge way to go, 4 years ago I could not even turn on a mac computer, neither did I know about aperture, or had I heard of my favourite artists, like Nan Goldin and Richard Billingham. I am pleased with how much my work flowed and how I stuck to the original idea, sometimes I can change my mind, and I really had to stop myself from going in different directions. Because I was comparing my work to others and worried it wasn’t going to work, my self-doubt is something need to work on before I hit the industry, but Rome wasn’t built in a day. I am pleased I made use and went multimedia, I used equipment that is old school, and turned it into modern. At the point of evaluation before, I have always highlighted the fact I can go very off course. But I think if I could change anything it would have to be that I should not have wobbled in my choice as much and spend time trying to tow a line that wasn’t for me to tow.

I also spent much more time on m y moving images and blog than leaving enough time to worry about the stills. But in the end, I couldn’t have been happier with them. That said, if I didn’t receive so much help from Pete and Paul I would have got very behind.  

. I came into Salisbury later for my final year and at first, I found it hard to settle. I do treat my photography degree as a chance to go all out, to experiment and I wasn’t sure at first, I belonged here. I knew that I should have, with hindsight done a media/film course. But I did explain all this at interview stages and I was reassured I could elaborate my media portfolio. I have taught myself videography in order for me to be moving where the industry is. I’ve developed a style that is mine. whenever I speak to anyone that’s what they tell me I must do, stay true, but that’s so hard when your filled with self-doubt. Plus, I had been taught by a department who completely knew my style, encouraged it, it took me three years to go forward with it so I have really found that tough, to feel like I’m not good enough to be here because I am not a technical photographer. But the last three weeks has changed my feelings. working with the staff and students has made all the difference. 

I am so happy with my exhibition plans and took a lot of time planning and creating my work. The build is next week and I am confident my projection will be installed without problems. I have been chopping and changing it a little, but I will now leave it well alone as sometimes when you have worked on something for 14 weeks it can start to look terrible!

I know for a fact I have produced more work than most of my peers. I know for a fact I have put far more hours in as I have created stills and moving image. I also know I have used more mediums and techniques than them too. Will this reflect in my grade? No. I took a gamble, took offense almost at having to defend my work and my style so I have dug my heels in to prove a point. I could have created the same old pictures that everyone else did and played it safe. Worked just as hard and created something aesthetically flawless. But why when life is not aesthetically flawless, its hard, and difficult, and complex. I believe my art reflects this.

But, art is the ultimate anarchy. And that attitude of mine has got me places in life, its kept me standing so if the reader to this does not get me or my style then I’m ok with that

I am already working in the industry, 4 years ago I was borrowing old cameras, now I have a full kit and people are starting to notice my work, and ask for my style, which is where you need to be as a professional. you get recognised for your brand and you get to stay true to yourself and trust our work. there are a million polished togs all looking for the big bucks, the universities are churning out a massive amount of educated, brilliant, talented photographers. I want to be noticed for my own style, it feels more important now than ever.

I need to keep working hard, the degree is only the first rung on the ladder, but I know that I have the drive and determination to make something really great of my life and career. After this assignment my eyes have been opened to the evils of social media, I actually deleted all mine with a total of 8,000 followers. This has been the year of massive self-doubt for me. Of questioning my style and who I am. But for all the down sides it has the up’s so I will create a new Insta and website. I will put my work back out there.

 Moving forward I have got two festivals lined up. Bestival and Ox jam. The director of the documentary film about lady Gaga Chris Mourkebel is arranging a meeting with me in Dec to discuss future projects he has coming up in the UK. I have promo work lined up within the sports and leisure industry.  A heavy metal band, ‘End of Daze’ who is up and coming has asked me to do audio visuals for their single. They are huge in Europe all ready. Last views on YouTube were amounting to 34,000.  Their manager has worked in America on the TV shows the vampire diary’s and the originals. He love’s my work and wants to introduce me to the industry, he believes in my work and that’s all it takes is a chance and a bit of luck! It’s starting to happen. I just need to keep going. The tools I have learnt from my education really are just the start. I have taken them and ran with them, self-teaching myself so much that when I look back I actually feel pretty proud of myself.

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For hand in after many experiments, it feels great to have some direction. Here is a shoot I did to present my final images as a small fashion zine. 

I set the rig and the lighting and placed each page for the zine using the old light reflector as a backdrop. I had wanted gray anyway and by accident I relised, it was already on the perfect background. 

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Fashion demo.

This is my style combined with high res, I have used all platforms, even footage from my phone as it felt right that I had started my journey with a Samsung phone I should finish it with one. 

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I have saved so may screenshots that is I had had the time I would have liked to have made more of a storybook.

But the words are all the same online, it been a constant script since I first joined these sites. 

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Ideas for small zine or photo book.

Just when I hit a block in my work, I did this edit and knew its how I could present my finals, like knick Knights insert in skinheads, I decided to create something raw and honest. 

I love the idea of playing around with negative space and to mix up the text with lyrics. Then I wondered about using some of the song lyrics I had written in response to me creating but I was ruing out of time. 

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Ideas for book/zine

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LIGHTBOX EXPERIMENTS

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Medium format experiments

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Layers within Layers

It's at this point that I start to realize how many layers there are to my work. For one flat image, the multimedia platforms are being flattened, but I am not sure that this translates to one flat image rather than it being a stop-motion moving image.

I have decided that after much experimentation to present everything as a photo book or a fashion zine. 

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