bakashidan

[bakashidan]

I have made a craft paint acrylic on canvas repaint of The Happy Accidents of the Swing, by Jean-Honoré Fragonard, but it's frogs🐸🌸

(Available as prints, stickers, and a bunch of other things on my Redbubble shop✨🐸)

[bakashidan]

Art by ivory black

[bakashidan]

Red Knight by Ami Thompson

[bakashidan]

🧡

[bakashidan]

the kitchen is for high drama and the couch is for soft but fraught conversations and emotional closure and the doorway is for comedy

[bakashidan]

[bakashidan]

mornings, coffee, croissants, and the news

[bakashidan]

Spine surgery. 18/11/2021 and 2/12/2021.

[bakashidan]

How slutty would you say you are?

In theory? Very. In practice? Not at all. I’m lazy.

[bakashidan]

Brains, Beauty, and Brawn/Green, Blue, and Red

The power trio that must never die.

[bakashidan]

i identify as an inconvenience to the world

[bakashidan]

Feeling an immense sense of self hatred...

...kinda like if life just sucker punches me without a break.

Taking a break from communicating because i dont know how to face people and i dont know how to pick topics to keep them engaged and not feel like they're wasting time on some worthless garbage and i dont know how to not feel like shit the very moment they seem to lose interest even though i know it would happen anyway. Starting to confuse love with envy, perhaps? I want someone to be mine as much as i want people to not be mine and live their life to the fullest though i know i cant be a hundred percent happy with it because i can never be the reason for their happiness. Do i appear to be desperate towards you? Do you find me annoying? I dont want you to feel annoyed with me. I make up jokes and comedic chops to make our conversations lighter but the amount of time they go on keeps getting shorter and shorter. I cant change that. I want to change that. I cant. If i do you'll find me annoying if you havent already. Maybe talking to me does feel like playing the one coin oneliner machine in the arcade that uses the same two dozens response everytime you turn the knob. And you're getting bored, i cant blame anything but myself. I feel like i want to apologize to you but youre too good of a person to admit it and youll say stuff like its okay or you didnt mind and our contact will really die off because by then i wont find any other thing to talk about and youll find me weird. I want to keep our chats as taintless as possible, i dont want to dirty them, i want to make them precious, at least enough to be a reason behind my life so far. Something i can smile about when i later think about it and something i can revisit anytime. But god do i love you, or do i want you to love me? Do i want you to be happy or do i want to not be jealous of the reason for your happiness? And at times like these i remind myself that you might as well not be real and i might as well stay in my dream world. I dont know.

[bakashidan]

Sacred Fish by Morten Solgaard Pedersen

[bakashidan]

sorry bro can't go out tonight. i'm stuck in an eternal state of melancholy

[bakashidan]

baby i’ve got half finished wips you couldn’t even imagine

[bakashidan]

Shoe studies by Julia Zhuravleva

[bakashidan]