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im scared i looked at evil tumblr for too long now im super duper scared

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millions of american soldiers die every year trying to rocket jump. thankfully their lives are worthless

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interesting how it's always "iranian regime" and never "israeli regime" and definetly never "iran, where the us and uk overthrew a democratically elected leader because the iranian parliment voted to nationalise iranian oil to stop foreign countries profiting off of their resources, with the western powers' actions ultimatly leading to the islamic republic of iran that they so fear"

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little girl whose fursona is a baby cow: for my third wish i want you to make the saying "you are what you eat" literal, no matter the disaster, no matter the pain

genie: yah ok

vampire working his office job: turns into an 8 foot wave of human blood sweeping through the office drowning his coworkers and thoroughly saturating everything, the furniture the walls the floor, with blood carrying a large variety of diseases, so that renovation is not an option and the entire building has to be condemned once men in full body hazmat suits confirm that nobody survived

tarrare somewhere in his grave: turns into a toddler

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these customers are pissing me off

im the original employee

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buying microsoft products funds genocide

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[staggering to my feet and wiping a single perfect drip of blood from my mouth] i have to get back on my bullshit. no matter the cost

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The central joke of the Ulysses Ogre meme hinges on the Ogre holding themselves to unreasonable standards by expecting to fully grasp one of the most famously difficult works of the 20th Century after only a single reading, which just doesn't work if you substitute your favourite video game, because frankly, your favourite video game is not Ulysses – but to be fair, the overwhelming majority of books are not Ulysses either. There's probably a video game somewhere out there that's as textually challenging as Ulysses, and it's probably some random-ass RPG Maker game from 2006 with an author whose name is a dick joke and a present fandom of approximately eleven people.

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susie badguy

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helloooo sydney mutuals i am playing yourshot on sunday 20th july 🧍🏻‍♀️🧍🏻‍♀️ i have tickets for $25 - cheaper than they are online if anyone wants to watch me dj some STUPID tunes message me 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

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a pig in LA deliberately turned and aimed and shot a rubber bullet at the kneecap of an Australian reporter

the news posted it saying she was "caught in the crossfire" but it was visibly very deliberate - but the Australian news is too cowardly accurately report on an attack on one of their own employees by cops even if they're not Australian cops

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YOUR HOLY & VIRTUOUS HERETIC

Play the demo and wishlist now!

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Anybody else have a growing fear of updating their tech cuz everything seems to be getting worse and worse

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Rez HD is Cobbed

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the year was Two Thousand and twenty-four. I took a puff of my Electronic-Cigarette, inhaling the vapours. my mobile terminal buzzed in my pocket, a flat slab of microchips and glossy touchscreen. I ignored it....... probably another Electronic-Mail