balsamrps

[balsamrps]

I knew he had his eyes on you He’s not the right guy for you Don’t hate me cause I write the truth No I would never lie to you

[balsamrps]

i’m constantly craving an au where muse a and muse b are in this toxic relationship where they’re breaking up every other week and they really only get along when they’re high or having sex so they’re just always getting high and having ((hate)) sex and they fight 24/7 and cheat on each other idk i want it 

[balsamrps]

I want a we’ve been in a long distance relationship for over a year now. So I finally deiced to move to your city to be with you without saying. Just so I can surprise you, then when I show up at your door another Guy/Girl opens the door. 

[balsamrps]

SEMI-SERIOUS PLAYFIGHTS THAT END WITH ONE PERSON PINNED TO THE FLOOR/WALL AND ACCIDENTAL FURIOUS KISSING THO

[balsamrps]

chasingshxdows:

squiddly—diddly:

Now that gay marriage is legal in Nevada does that mean drunk straight dudes in Las Vegas can accidentally get married.

[balsamrps]

give me a “you come into the restaurant at least once a week and i always argue with my colleagues as to who gets to wait your table because i think you are really cute and  i really want to ask you out but i am too awkward” au

[balsamrps]

( &; WANTED PLOTS )

 sex hotline au where muse a is a phone sex operator and muse b is an awkward freshman in college who wants a taste before stepping out into the real world. what’s meant to be a five minute phone call turns into an hour long fest, featuring several mind-blowing orgasms and learning more about each other than professionally appropriate. muse b gets a part time job just to pay for their possibly harmful sex addiction (or just addiction to muse a’s voice) and the two converse regularly for months. one day, muse b hears an oh-so-familiar voice ordering coffee in the line in front of them.

cliché best friend’s older brother plot where muse a is infatuated with their best friend’s older brother muse b, who they see occasionally when they’re over to study or for a sleepover. when muse a is a freshman and at their first high school party, they have their first kiss who’s later discovered to be muse b. muse b rejects muse a as soon as they’re confronted, which leaves muse a heartbroken until muse b goes off to college. three years later muse a gets accepted to the same college as muse b, and they see each other once again.

classical musician au? like muse a is a highly acclaimed classical musician (piano/violin/etc) who’s lost sight of their love for music, where their entire life revolves around their profession and being technically flawless but bland. muse b is a busker barely making rent every month, and when muse a hears muse b playing outside a coffee shop one day they’re completely captivated by muse b’s music. it’s a love for music they haven’t felt in ages, which is why muse a makes a quick move to get to know this struggling street musician.

private school au where it’s the holidays and muse a and muse b are the only two students staying at school during the break. it’s quite awkward as they’ve never so much as talked before, but their secret admiring glances at each other haven’t gone unnoticed by other students. their first conversation results in a snowball fight and they spend the entire break glued at the hip.

celebrity plot where muse a and muse b are both successful musicians with humongous fan-bases. muse a tweets an insult about muse b’s favorite movie and muse b decides to take a jab at muse a’s music. what starts as a fun feud gets blown up by the fans, to the point where there’s blogs and accounts dedicated to the two of them getting together.

radio host au where muse a is the familiar voice of reason on the university’s popular radio station. muse b admires from afar, from the ace music choices to the heartfelt advice that muse a always seems to have for their listeners. muse b is harshly dumped by their girlfriend/boyfriend one night, and decides to call in to their favorite radio station to whine. the conversation lasts longer than the allotted time for a single caller. on air flirting is a legitimate thing, right?

hospital au where muse a is a volunteer at the local hospital because they like to help out, reading children stories and helping them color. muse b is spoiled and bratty with a set of famous parents, and after getting arrested for their reckless behavior muse b’s parents order them to help out with the hospital in order to improve their reputation. at first muse b walks around like they own the place because of their parent’s significant donations to the hospital, but muse a refuses to give in to muse b’s absurd demands. muse b learns sympathy and muse a learns that people really can change.

[balsamrps]

“i’m drunk and texted the wrong number to ask for a ride home but you came anyways and hey wait didn’t we date in high school i thought you moved across the country” au

[balsamrps]

AU where muse a and muse b are best friends and muse a is inexperienced in love and relationships and sex and they’re interested in someone who is very experienced and they want to make a good impression on the other so they ask muse b to help them and teach some things like teach how to kiss and all that but with time it progresses and muse b starts to teach muse a about more intimate things and there isn’t a lot of awkwardness until they realize maybe they like each other and muse a starts asking for help just to get it going with muse b instead of wanting to impress the other random person and (✿◠‿◠)

[balsamrps]

no but ships where the guy is big & a jerk to most people & the girl is little & she bosses him around like she isnt tiny & he just does what she wants with a stupid smile on his face bc hes totally whipped & wants to give her everything & is really only tender with her are very important to me. & shes totally in love with him too so when other women look at him she gets all bristly & wants to fight somebody so he just takes her tiny fists in his much bigger hands & kisses her till she relaxes 

[balsamrps]

Someone needs to write a ‘the fire alarm went off at 3 am and now the cute guy from the flat next door is standing next to me in his underwear’ AU

[balsamrps]

ph. Petra Collins

[balsamrps]

plot where a couple bros are just bros and say “no homo” a lot and sometimes make out when they’re drunk or stoned but it’s totally not gay because dude we were so gone last night

[balsamrps]

i’m in a band and you’re in another band and our bands are kind of rivals but i mean you’re really cute au

[balsamrps]

i just want a “my bestfriend dated my ex-boyfriend so as a revenge, i will date her older brother” cause idk i just want to

[balsamrps]

ok but i really want a plot where muse a and muse b are best friends of the same gender and muse a finds out that muse b slept with a girl everyone thinks he has a crush on. so he gets so angry but he’s actually angry bc he’s secretly into muse b and this chick he thought he was friends with just swooped in and stole him. but he doesn’t want people to know that he likes boys !! so he pretends like he’s mad because he likes her !! but he actually likes him !!

[balsamrps]

i want a fucking serial killer plot like say muse a and muse b have been dating for the longest fucking time, they’re totally in love, and then at like 2 am one night, muse b comes back home fuckin covered in blood like “ok usually i have time to clean up, you weren’t supposed to see me like this but they had 911 on speed dial and i had to come home” and it’s muse a like oh, oh shit i’m in love with a serial killer and muse b like well fuck the love of my life knows i’ve killed like so many people and idk i feel like this could go places u know