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[bandlevandle]

I guess the reason all that Backrooms stuff has never really fazed me is because I worked in on-site networking support for a while, and literally every city's downtown district is just Like That once you get off the beaten path. Not just the really big cities, either; the one I'm currently living in has a population of less than 250 000 – metro area included – and a downtown area about six blocks across, and the service corridors still manage to do some House of Leaves shit. At one point I was trying to map the route of a misbehaving network cable, started out in a shopping mall parking garage, and ended up surfacing in the basement of the casino across the street. Totally unsecured – apparently neither the mall's administration nor the casino's managers knew that particular service corridor existed.

[bandlevandle]

me when sexualized design is appealing to me: I love being a pervert this is the correct way to be

me when sexualized design is not appealing to me: all of you are fucking lame and stupid get better taste

me when my heart is ripped off my torso by a dragon: oh fuck

[bandlevandle]

Other movies: [large caption stating the year it’s set in]

Longlegs:

[bandlevandle]

Maro’s Bloomburrow Teaser

Before previews for Bloomburrow officially begin, I thought it would be fun to do another of my Duelist-style teasers where I give tiny hints of things to come. Note that I’m only giving you partial information.  

First up, here are some things you can expect:  

• A new mechanic which is a tweak on a mechanic from 2013

• “Destroy target creature” (a spell with only this rules text) gets a new mana cost

• A cycle of uncommon lands that each reference four creature types

• Counters in the set: +1/+1, blight, coin, finality, flood, flying, indestructible, loyalty, stash, stun, and supply

• A noncreature subtype makes its first return

• A ten-card cycle that acts as typal glue

• Two mechanics that came out in the same set return each part of a different two-color archetype

• The word “Squirrels” shows up four times in rules text

• A mythic cycle with a new symbol

• One of the cutest mechanics we’ve ever made

Next, here are some rules text that will be showing up on cards:  

• “Create X tokens that are copies of target token you control.”

• “If you control a Raccoon, you may discard a card.”

• “Creatures your opponents control have base toughness 1.”

• “Whenever one or more other creatures you control leave the battlefield without dying,”

• “if it’s the first instant spell, the first sorcery spell, or the first Otter spell”

• “put a flood counter on target land.”

• “where X is the number of creatures you opponents controlled that were exiled this turn.”

• “for each other Squirrel and/or Food you control.”

• “As long as there are four or more card types among cards exiled with CARDNAME,”

• “up to one target artifact, creature, or planeswalker an opponent controls loses all abilities until your next turn.”

Here are some creature type lines from the set: 

• Creature – Hamster Citizen

• Creature – Frog Advisor

• Creature – Skunk Assassin

• Creature – Raccoon Berserker

• Creature – Squirrel Warlock Bard

• Creature – Rabbit Mouse

• Legendary Creature – Badger Warrior

• Legendary Creature – Weasel Mercenary

• Legendary Creature – Elemental Elk

• Legendary Creature – Bird Dragon

Finally, here are some names in the set: 

• Crumb and Get It

• Festivals of Embers

• Hop to It

• Kitnap

• Playful Shove

• Polliwallop

• Rabid Gnaw

• Shrike Force

• War Squeak

• Wishing Well

Tune-in to our official YouTube and Twitch channels (youtube.com/@mtg antwitch.tv/Magic and) at 9:00 am PT on Tuesday, July 9 as Bloomburrow previews begin.

[bandlevandle]

need people to see this i feel insane

[bandlevandle]

[bandlevandle]

$19.99 to RENT a movie online…we need to start killing these ppl.

[bandlevandle]

[bandlevandle]

US states where a popular adult website will be blocked as of July 1, 2024

[bandlevandle]

CUTE BOY FROM CLASS WHO IS GROWING HIS HAIR OUT AND WEARING A HOODIE: thanks for helping me with my homework! hey um... is it okay if I tell you something important? you have to promise to keep it a secret....

SKELETON BALLING:

[bandlevandle]

The constant rolling disaster that is Overwatch's game development aside, what really perplexes me about how Blizzard is handling the broader franchise is their continual insistence that a canon narrative exists in spite of their equally continual refusal to tell anyone what it is.

Like, okay, the events of the games aren't canon. Fair enough: the games are multiplayer-only, and you can't account for player actions.

Oh, and the animated short films aren't canon either – they're properly understood as in-universe propaganda, not depictions of actual events. That's a little high concept for you guys, but fine.

But surely the comics are canon, right? Well, no; some of the comics (we're not telling you which ones) were canon at one point, but the writing team has decided to go in a different direction.

My dudes, what is left? The weird Source Filmmaker porn? Is that canon? Well, apparently it's at least as canon as anything else!

[bandlevandle]

sketch

[bandlevandle]

I'm sorry guys I know no one is going to want to hear this but I just got resuscitated after being dead for 5 minutes and it turns out hazbin hotel is true

[bandlevandle]

I just....I just learned that there's a word in the English language...for when you run into someone to hug them with all the enthusiasm and strength you have....I learned that it's called glomp.

My God, English has so many words to describe physical intimacy, I'm in love

[bandlevandle]

Seriously they release new animals every week what the hell is this

[bandlevandle]