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What I thought the Naruto ending would actually be like

• team 7 united and inseparable • team 7 in ANBU • Sakura as head medic • Sasuke as ANBU captain • Orochimaru dead or imprisoned • ACTUAL emotional development between Sasuke and Team 7 • Sasuke spending the rest of his days making it up for Naruto for saving him • Sasuke WORKING on an actual friendship between him and Sakura • Naruto and Karin actually interacting and becoming good friends • Tenzou eventually discovering who he was before Orochimaru kidnapped him • Iruka-sensei adopting Naruto or asking him to move in with him • Kakashi talking to Naruto about Minato and Kushina • Kakashi providing a believable story to why he never looked after Naruto • The Hyuuga losing the curse seal • an explanation to why Hiashi treated his daughter like dirt and emotionally abused her???? • Tenten as a successful and brilliant young kunoichi, famous for her weapons in all nations because heck, that girl rocks • Lee-sensei tbh • Also, Naruto was supposed to put his family above all else not abandon them for work. He worked his ass off to be acknowledged and loved and now that he is he doesn’t appreciate it? Excuse me? • Oh and, where the heck is Sasuke’s twenty-something children?? One of his dreams was to rebuild his clan. • where is Sasuke becoming a good human being and finding actual love and having children he gives a shit about? • where are all the moments that was supposed to happen between Naruto and Sasuke after Sasuke came back?? • what about the part where Sakura’s development isn’t WIPED and she isn’t turned into a pathetic love sick puppy and is actually an accomplished successful and independent woman?? • Rookie 9 being close knit af not barely interacting • I JUST WANTED SOME TEAM 7 BONDING IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR • I JUST WANTED FUCKIN PROPER EMOTIONAL DEVELOPMENT AND FRIENDSHIP BUILDING WTF IS THIS BS

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on one hand Yoda totally deserves all the shit we give him for stealing Luke’s food and lamp and just being a total annoyance when Luke arrived but on the other hand if I’d been living alone in a swamp for twenty two years I too would absolutely troll the shit out of the first homeless twink that came my way

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Post-4th war kakashi is excited he can finally wink. It allows him to be his weirdest most socially awkward self.

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And there it is.

Men actually ADMITTING that they realize a lot of men are fully aware that they are generally unlikeable, have little substance and little to offer a woman in a relationship.

They're also admitting that said men are becoming butthurt about the fact that women now more than ever are making the conscious decision to no longer settle for them just so we won't have to deal with the "shame" of being single.

Insecure and self-entitled men are literally upset over the fact that women no longer need them the way we used to in the past. Their sense of self-worth is dependent on female validation and instead of stepping up their game, changing how they think, etc, they're starting to pout and throw tantrums over how useless they feel.

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"color theory"? Well personally I think red and blue are secretly friends even though they don't act like it but I don't know how popular that is

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Kaz and Inej 🌙

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lawyers arguing their case but like it’s an internet discourse post

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I've been pretty consistently getting third place every race in Mario Kart ever since me & my dad & brother started playing together regularly (early 2020) and I just figured it was because I sucked but then me and dad switched controllers for a race and he was like "???? Ashland this thing is very broken". So we got new controllers and now I'm winning very regularly. Like just absolutely crushing them. It's been very funny.

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Watching Naruto from scratch as an adult is so rewarding, because when I first saw it I came from the perspective of ‘whooo! three awesome children on a fun adventure with their teacher!’, whereas now I’m like ‘…depressed area man dragged around by three hyperactive children’

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why is the internet becoming pg. like why is that happening and how is that monetarily beneficial compared to allowing uncensored content. personally i think we should create a new one and call it Nasty Internet

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Best of Howl Pendragon:

“You’re a dreadfully nosy, horribly bossy, appallingly clean old woman. Control yourself. You’re victimizing us all. (…) You must admit I have a right to live in a pigsty if I want.”

“I feel ill,” he announced. “I’m going to bed, where I may die.” He tottered piteously to the stairs. “Bury me beside Mrs. Pentstemmon.”

Howl’s voice was presently heard shouting weakly, “Help me, someone! I’m dying from neglect up here!”

“I’m dying of boredom,” Howl said pathetically. “Or maybe just dying.”

“I assure you, my friends, I am cone sold stober.” He got up and stalked upstairs, feeling for the wall as if he thought it might escape him unless he kept in touch with it. His bedroom door did escape him. “What a lie that was!” Howl remarked as he walked into the wall. “My shining dishonesty will be the salvation of me.”

“Typical!” he said to Sophie. “I break my neck trying to get here, and I find you peacefully tidying up!” 

Best of Sophie Hatter: 

“The rule was: Lose your temper, lose a customer. She had just proven that rule. It troubled her to realize how very enjoyable it had been.”

“At this, Sophie said a word she had learned from Martha, that neither old ladies nor young girls are supposed to know.”

“In the middle of the night Sophie was woken by someone snoring. She jumped upright, rather irritated to discover that she was the one who had been snoring.”

“There was no trace of the green-slime mood, now things were going Howl’s way, Sophie noticed. She wanted to slap him.”

“Sophie levered herself up, wondering if she was meant to kiss this hand or not. But since she felt more like raising her stick and beating the King over the head with it, she shook the King’s hand and gave a creaking little curtsy.”

“I feel like killing something!”

“You’ve no right to walk into people’s castles and take their guitars.”

”I think her age has caught up with her! she thought. She’s crazy!”

Both:

“Aches and pains troubling you?” he said. “Or has something annoyed you?” “Annoyed?” said Sophie. “Why should I be annoyed? Someone only filled the castle with rotten aspic, and deafened everyone in Porthaven, and scared Calcifer to a cinder, and broke a few hundred hearts. Why should that annoy me?”  Howl laughed. “I apologize.”

“Nothing is safe from you. If I were to court a girl who lived on an iceberg in the middle of the ocean, sooner or later— probably sooner— I’d look up to see you swooping overhead on a broomstick. In fact, by now I’d be disappointed in you if I didn’t see you.”  “Are you off to the iceberg today?” Sophie retorted.” 

“I’ll make some hot buttered toast,” she said. “Is that all you can do in the face of tragedy??” Howl asked. “Make toast!”

“I’ve got a hangover!” “No, you hit your head on the floor,” Sophie said.  

Howl said, “I think we ought to live happily ever after,” and she though he meant it. Sophie knew that living happily ever after with Howl would be a good deal more eventful than any story made it sound, thought she was determined to try. “It should be hair-raising,” added Howl. “And you’ll exploit me,” Sophie said. “And then you’ll cut up all my suits to teach me,” said Howl.

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Howl from Howl’s Moving Castle is the most relatable character of all time because:

- will literally do anything to avoid responsibility (described as a “Slitherer Outerer” many times)

-cries when his hair dye goes wrong

- does his best to convince a king that he’s a bit useless

- family actually thinks he’s useless

- to be fair can be quite useless at times

- constantly described as throwing “tragic looks” at people when he wants attention

- created a moving castle purely to avoid people

- pretends he’s from a mystical magic land but is actually from Wales

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i cannot stop laughing at how quickly and easily sasuke comes up with the one and only scenario that could somehow surpass every other horrific thing kakashi has already lived through.

we all thought it couldn’t be done, that it was impossible, that we’d finally reached the max limit for potential traumatic experiences.  but then sasuke’s like “if i die here, transplant my left eye into kakashi” LMAOOO you guys we REALLY BELIEVED there was no way kakashi’s life could possibly get any worse after the obito reveal, but we were CLOWNS.  sasuke has been back for less than 2 seconds and the very first thing he does is invent an all-new circle of hell for kakashi to inhabit.  like.  i’m honestly so impressed with him.  that’s galaxy-brained ingenuity.