beccajenner-blog

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reid-jenner‌:

Reid smiled. After all this time, it was still nice to hear it. It was still nice to know it was true. To have found someone who slotted so seamlessly into his life, and filled it with more than he had ever even thought to want. It was easy to take it for granted, and perhaps he’d become a bit too comfortable, but recent events had only reminded him how precious it was. “I love you, too,” he said, leaning forward to peck a kiss on her lips. 

He sighed exaggeratedly as she reminded him of their parental duties - not because he actually dreaded it, but just because this moment felt like the kind he’d like to bottle up and keep for a while. The calm after the storm… “Fine, but we’re skipping story time,” he teased, reaching down for Rebecca’s hand and interlacing their fingers as he lead them towards Sarah’s room. 

“Alright, lil’ lady,” he announced as he entered the room to see his daughter hovered over the tank. “Tell your friends goodnight. It’s officially bedtime.” 

Becca locks her fingers between those of her husband, trailing after him as he leads the way to their daughters room. She lets him go when he enters the room, instead choosing to stand in the door way and cross her arms. A soft smile spreads over her features as she watches her husband easily slip into the role of father. Sarah grins a toothless grin, looking up at her father and giggling, “I want to tell you all their names first,” the young girl holds up both hands to count off the fish one by one and Rebecca steps forward, feeling like this might take a while. “In the morning, darling. Bed. Now.” She raises her eyebrows, her tone gentle but also firm. She sits at the foot of the bed, crossing her legs and waiting for her daughter to climb up. 

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georgiewallace‌:

“Really? Were you expecting some Sheldon Cooper to be running that place?” Becca wasn’t the first, nor would be the last person to say they didn’t see her as the comic book kind of girl, but that was the beauty of things. How unpredictable and unexpected some things could be. “What would’ve pegged me for? I’ve always loved them. Always loved that world of comics, games and everything else in between. When I cam back, I wanted to do something for me that was me and something my young self would be glad with, too. The opportunity came and I decided to give it a shot.” She shrugged, explaining her reasons behind her doings.

She wrinkles her nose, “A bit more like a big, fat man. But I’ve been caught in the same sense of stereotyping, so I suppose it doesn't matter who I was imagining-- you’re the reality.” She smiles, “Well, that’s wonderful, isn’t it? Those that can make a career out of a passion are truly the luckiest of them all.” She raises her eyebrows, “Came back? From where, if I may ask?” 

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rowmineo‌:

Rowan couldn’t help but look at the woman who slapped the five dollar bill next to her. The Mineo had forgotten her wallet at home and was rumbling through the spare dollar bills and change she had at the bottom of her tote bag when a woman impatiently paid the remaining dues on her behalf. So much for the stereotypical small town, kind hospitality. Smiling at the barista, she stepped to the side and made a short comment towards the woman. “Look I don’t know what drama of sorts you are dealing with, but I didn’t appreciate that. Impatient much?” 

Rebecca is not in the mood for anyone holding up her morning longer than they already have. Since the weekend she has been on edge. On edge actually didn’t begin to cover it. This was one of the only moments she’d had to herself, since she was too afraid to let the girls out of her sight. She hadn’t slept at all. She was lying to her husband. And now, she had an hour alone and she wanted her coffee and this woman was going to bite her head off? Becca bit her tongue out of habit, viciously eyeing the other woman before she decided that not saying what she wanted to say wasn’t possibly going to make her feel better. “The correct response is thank you,” she snapped, pushing her sunglasses over her eyes and turning away from the woman to wait for her coffee in the opposite corner of the room.

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georgiewallace‌:

“Yeah, it is something along those lines indeed. People are caring more about the origin of the product than anything else. Which is perfectly fine and what should’ve happened from the beginning, too. But the downside of it is just that everything ends up becoming more expensive and not so accessible for everyone.” Georgie shrugged, having a lot to say about that small thing. “Oh, okay. Ever saw that comic book shop on the village? That is mine.”

“Oh, sure.” Rebecca nods, being able to vaguely picture the shop in her mind. She wasn’t one for comic books, but it was a small town, so she passed it often enough. “I wouldn’t have pegged you for that owner. How’d you get into the comic book business?” 

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poppyadavies‌:

“Oh, it’s okay, it’s okay. Please don’t worry about it! I hope your coffee helps soothe you, even though that’s not really the point of caffeine,” Poppy chuckled and gave the woman a friendly smile. “And thank you, again, for the coffee. I appreciate it so much. Maybe I could return the favor sometime? Or share them now, chat a bit, I would love to help put your mind at ease,” she said honestly. It was the nurse in her. She wanted to help take care of people, too.

She softens, picking up that her anxiety is palpable. Finally, she is passed her coffee and she takes a deep sip. Her nerves running rampant had next to no relation to her lack of energy, well, maybe there was some relation. She hadn’t slept a wink the last few evenings, and her daughters being oblivious to her situation meant that they were being as devilish as ever. The truth was, exhausted didn’t begin to scratch the surface of what she was feeling. She sipped her coffee again, something in her mind telling her to scan the coffee shop for what she thought Willa may look like-- though, she didn’t know for sure. She had only seen photos. She snaps herself back to attention when the blonde woman she is speaking to seems to be making her some sort of offer. She pauses, not having heard the entirety of what she said. She curses her own rudeness, “I think I’m gonna step out for some fresh air, but I don’t want to take up any of your morning. I’m sure you have somewhere to be?”

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reid-jenner‌:

He could sense her tension. Whatever fun, flirtatious energy had been zapping between them before the party on Saturday had been sucked up and replaced by stark reality. He felt it too - that fear that despite one’s best efforts, sometimes the universe intervened and left one powerless against it’s cruelty. He knew firsthand what it was like, and he’d reached the point where he knew how to shut it off when it threatened to overwhelm him. It was what had allowed him to stay behind at the mansion and keep searching, what had allowed him to remain standing when he walked through the door and saw his wife and children safe and sound. Because the truth was, he didn’t think he could have survived another loss - not this one, for certain - and it was only relief that he hadn’t had to that allowed him to keep moving. 

So when he apologized for not making it to the Bed and Breakfast, he meant it to encompass all the countless other things he couldn’t even give words to, knowing she would understand. His hand came up to cup her face, thumb tracing along her cheekbone as he looked at her as though trying to commit it all to memory. He had to have faith that he wouldn’t lose her - if only to keep himself sane - but another, darker part of him, told him he still couldn’t allow himself to forget. Just in case. “I’m still sorry,” he said. He should have said ‘I’m glad you’re safe,’ but that felt too close to admitting she had ever been in danger. 

She searched in his eyes for the underlying meaning for his words. What was he sorry for? Was he sorry that he had been unable to reach her during the storm? Was he sorry that he had insisted they go to the event in the first place instead of staying home with their children? She relented to the inquisition in her brain, deciding that the what didn’t matter as much as the statement itself. He was sorry for events beyond his control. Her husband, ever the martyr, would take responsibility for her pain when it wasn’t due to him. She leaned into his hand, closing her eyes for a few moments and smiling softly. She opened her mouth, unsure of what she wanted to say, but certain she should say something. The words came without her thinking of them, “I love you.” 

A handful of moments passed before Rebecca blinked her eyes open, her gaze falling on the clock above the microwave. She realized enough time had passed that the time came now for her to put Sarah down. She was glad Reid was able to help her, despite the girl’s older age, she fought bedtime equally as hard as when she had been younger. Becca smiled at her husband and slipped from under his arms, “Help me put Sarah down and then you can make it up to me.” 

[beccajenner-blog]

You wanted happiness, I can’t blame you for that, and maybe a mouth sounds idiotic when it blathers on about joy but tell me you love this, tell me you’re not miserable.

Richard Siken

@beccajenner

(via reid-jenner)

[beccajenner-blog]

poppyadavies‌:

“Totally understandable,” Poppy remarked and once she was satisfied, she adjusted the strap on her purse and looked over at the woman. “You look worried. I know, I know, I’m not usually this much of a mess! I swear,” she laughed. “It’s just been one of those days.” She hoped she understood, but if not, ah well. “Hopefully the rest of your day is less chaotic,” she teased, smiling. 

Rebecca softened the lines between her brows when the other woman spoke. She shook her head, a bit embarrassed at her behavior. First, a rude exclamation and next, she was caught staring? Rebecca ran her hand through her hair, trying to settle her nerves. She peered over the divide that separated her from the barista, counting the seconds until her coffee was in her hand. As absently as she could manage while still being polite, Becca raised her eyebrows at the woman’s words, “Sorry, I’m just a bit of a neat freak. Always organized, but it feels like I’m always a mess.” She laughs, humorlessly.

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ofscnnas‌:

     “OH MERDE,” SENNA uttered, a salient hiss reverberated throughout the cramped interior as Senna adjusted her leg so it was spilling over the edge of the bed. Despite having numerous visitors to assure her; her mother, her sister, Eduardo, Hixson and Tess, time still crept by at a devastatingly gradual pace, as if she could nestle herself within the confines of this hospital and never leave. But she couldn’t and furthermore, she wouldn’t. Her bustling nature, though it didn’t quite reflect that of a metropolitan city, kept the wheels in her head churning, but there were only so many times Senna could ask her friends and family to stay and entertain her. Her mother had brought her guitar, but every time she decided to play, lithe fingers hovered above the strings in a quivering motion. So she promptly gave in. A League of Their Own was playing in the background but Senna had lost interest as she pushed her peas around on her plate. The doctor said it wouldn’t be too long since the injury wasn’t fatal and for that, Senna supposed she was grateful, as much as she detested resided here. When she heard a knock on her door, Senna quirked an eyebrow, knowing Sarah, as she came to learn the nurse’s name in a drug-induced matter, wouldn’t have knocked, that with her gregarious nature, a certain charm to her that just wanted to heal people, so Senna pondered who it could be. Her brain scanned through all the possibilities, her mother? No, she said she was going back to Senna’s to make some dinner since she too, couldn’t stand cafeteria food. Noelle? No, she was at her physical therapist. Finally, Senna’s mind, clouded with painkillers gave up. “Come in,” she beckoned, in a hoarse voice, her hand abruptly reaching for the water. She squinted, almost as if the figure was positioned miles away, and in fact, her mind was not playing tricks on her. It was Rebecca Jenner. Senna recollected the last conversation she had with Tess, an almost sort of guilt washing over her, but she realized, she had no quarrels with the woman and refused to be dragged in the middle of anything that didn’t directly affect her. Besides, she didn’t have to be best friends with the woman, but being cordial was a must, especially since it seemed Rebecca was doing a duty, a well picked at hospital plate in one hand. “In the flesh!” Senna said, her tone resounding chipper. She did her best not to play the part of a wounded puppy. “Don’t tell me you’re playing candy-striper.” 

She searched Senna’s face for a hint of recognition. The women didn’t know each other well, but they did know each other well enough for to be odd to not make conversation in a situation such as this. Luckily for Rebecca, small talk was a specialty of hers. It hadn’t always been, but nowadays she found she genuinely cared about how people were, and what the details of their lives were like. It interested her for some unknown reason, so she wasn’t overwhelmed to approach the other woman’s bedside and lean against it. She chuckled at her words, “Why shouldn’t I tell you that? It’s the truth. You’re gonna shame me for volunteering now, are you?” She pauses as an unpleasant thought settles on her mind. 

She had made a point not to think about the entire evening of the Halloween party. It brought so much distress to her even to imagine what she was wearing. She grips the bedside for stability, forcing the thoughts from her mind. The memories of the rising panic as the door clicked into a locked state. The words falling from Tess’ lips so cruelly. Her own wailing, throat aching as she screamed to get out of the room to her children and her husband, to no avail. She swallows now, closing her eyes just briefly, before she blinks them open and wills a smile to return to her features. “You look well, and I’m not just saying that. Are you... May I ask if you’ve heard if it is expected to be a full recovery?” 

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ethanrycroft‌:

The last time he had been in this street was almost fifteen years ago and naturally, things had changed but naively he ignored how different it was. After he left for college, his mother made sure to keep him away from Portchester, mostly motivated by her wish of leaving this town. Looking around, Ethan tried to see any aspect that seemed familiar, that could help him find out where exactly in town he was. After a few seconds, of making a mental map of the town he remembered, he gave up and decided to ask the nearest stranger. “Excuse me,” he started, a small yet warm smile playing on his lips. “I’m pretty sure there was a pharmacy in this street but now I cannot seem to find it. Could you direct me to the closest one?" 

Rebecca was strolling home after a not-so-grueling yoga class in town. The autumnal wind was biting, but it distracted her in the way that her workout hadn’t. Often, she was able to distract herself with physical exercise. As she had aged it had been a good outlet for her anger and frustration, a married mother of two was no longer able to party all night or sleep with a random stranger-- not that she’d done much of that in her day, but she could have. It was more the option that kept her in check. She was surprised that sometimes she still felt she was twenty, even though she’d woken up to the same alarm, dressed the same babies, and made her husband the same cup of coffee for the last four years. It still sometimes felt like someone else’s routine that her limbs preformed automatically. She pondered this as she walked, yoga mat under her arm, until someone else’s voice interrupted her line of thought. 

She turned, facing the man. He seemed familiar, but almost in a way as if she didn't know him from here. He seemed familiar in a more personal sense, like she knew his type. She straightened her back, pausing after he spoke, to fully understand his questions. There weren’t a lot of visitors in Portchester, so she couldn’t remember the last time she’d been asked a question randomly on the street. She cleared her throat, “I think there used to be a corner store a block or so over. But now, there’s a CVS on main street.” She nodded towards where she was walking, a handful of blocks directly in front of them, “Shouldn’t be more than a ten minute walk this way.”

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georgiewallace‌:

“To be quite honest with you I think it is a trend that is slowly starting to get its public back. Something about the new generation caring more about things that will give them the exclusive feel. I don’t know.” Georgie sighed shaking her head, not really knowing if she was making any sense with her words. Not knowing if she was being judged right now, she frowned slightly at Becca, licking her lips before answering. “Yes. I actually do won a shop in town. Why?”

Rebecca nods, interested, “Yes, I do think I have read a bit about that. I think it’s called social capital or something like that. Social currency, maybe. The term’s escaped me now, but I do think I have read that people care more about the cup than they do about the taste or cost.” She smiles, nodding, “I thought so, it just sounds like a topic a small business owner would note. Nothing wrong with that, just funny. Which shop is yours?” 

[beccajenner-blog]

@ofscnnas

Rebecca had put off the task of separating from the girls to go to the hospital for as long as she could. She knew it was important, to be seen out in public, especially at the hospital where she had been known to volunteer. The town was so small that the hospital was desperate for volunteers, so many people were injured and they needed as many hands as they could have just to keep the waiting rooms clear of check-ups and secondary visits following the initial rush the weekend of the storm. Becca knew what she was truly worried about, and it wasn’t any unsightly wound or catchable-cold. She was worried she would see Willa out and about in the town. She was worried the come-to-life woman would show her face out of nowhere, and she would be forced to say something to her. The thought brought bile to Becca's throat, and her stomach twisted in ferociously anxious knots. She thought about heading to the hospitals day-care, nipping the girls, and heading for home. But she’d only been out of the house for an hour. She pushed herself to continue down the hospital corridor, passing out the meals on the cart she’d been given. 

She was down to one last tray, and so she approached the door at the end of the hall as she had with all the previous ones, and gently rapped her knuckles on the worn wood. She heard a faint ‘come in’, which prompted her to push open the door and enter after the cart she pushed. She knelt, getting the final tray, and then stood, eyeing the patient for the first time since she had walked in. She smiled gently, trying not to let a frightened look of familiarity too obviously grace her features as she neared the bedside of the woman she had spoken to in the coffee shop only days before. “Senna? Is that you?”

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poppyadavies‌:

Poppy knew she had more change somewhere… where did she put it? She was digging around in her pockets, after not finding it in her purse, and jumped when someone’s had slammed down on the counter. “Ah! Whoa!” she exclaimed before she realized what was happening. “Oh my god. I’m so sorry! I didn’t realize I was holding up the line. Thank you, so much,” she added with a sheepish grin and moved aside, tucking everything back into her purse. She really was overdue in organizing this thing. 

Rebecca smiles, put off slightly by her own outburst. She feels she was a little too firm, but she can’t go back and change it now. She tries to soften her features, so her stern smile more resembles her usual gentle one. “No need to worry, I’m afraid I’m a bit of a monster before my latte.” She steps out of the line as well, over to the pick-up counter. She pulls her purse tighter over her shoulder, crossing her free arm over her body. Becca wordlessly watched the other woman messily fiddle with her bag, her eyebrows knitting in concern. 

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reid-jenner‌: 

Reid sighed tiredly as he made his way over to his wife, sidling in behind her and wrapping his arms around her waist to pull her against him. It had been an exhausting few days, and while quiet moments between the two could be a rare commodity usually, it felt even more precious now. 

He didn’t like to dwell on the thought of it, but it had been one of the worst moments of his life, trapped inside that room while the storm raged on outside - unsure of what was happening and if Bex and the girls were safe…. He’d roamed the mansion for an hour trying to find his wife before finally heading home to the girls in hopes that Rebecca would have done the same. And the entire way home, the same phrase kept repeating in his head: Not again. Not again. Not again. The girls were allowed to sleep in their parent’s bed that night, and Reid held them all close. 

“I don’t think my day’s really worth discussing. We’re starting a case against those idiots in the clown masks, and I think Carson is close to bringing me in on that New Beginnings case - says he’s bringing in a star witness he wants me to prep…” But really, work was the farthest thing from his mind at the moment. “I’m sorry we never made it to that bed and breakfast,” he said softly as he placed a kiss to the crown of her head. 

Rebecca relaxed into his touch, humming as he kissed her head. She leaned back against him, just feeling him breathe for a few moments. She wasn’t sure how she felt anymore, sleepless nights had driven her to near insanity following the weekend’s storm. She had pushed all thoughts of Willa from her mind, which was surprisingly easy to do, given how much extra effort she was putting into worrying about the girls. The hours she’d spent worried for their lives were the most viciously frightening of her life. Spending all of her time with the girls meant she always knew where they were, every moment of every day. Being faced with not knowing that information and being powerless to get to them was a completely new feeling that had never faced her in her life as a mother. It was horrific, and she knew she would do everything in her power to avoid facing it again. 

In the morning, when she’d arrived home and felt their small, warm bodies wrapped in her arms in a hug, she had felt her heart begin to beat again. She’d felt lifeless before she knew if they were alright. The next most sense of relief she’d felt was minutes later when Reid had breathlessly walked through the front door. At least she could say that her family was whole for now. With the girls safely in bed this evening, and her night beginning to unfold with her husband, Rebecca felt first calm, then, tension began to rise in her back and neck. 

She didn’t lie to her husband. Period. The two kept nothing from each other. Except this ginormous secret which Tessa had put upon Becca’s lap, with no word of what to do or how to move forward. She knew she couldn’t physically get the words out to her husband, she couldn’t make herself say them. And she knew he would forgive her for that. Or, perhaps she hoped he would so strongly that she had convinced herself she believed he would. She ignored his words about work, willing herself to barely hear them. He didn’t want to get into it, so she wouldn’t either. 

She turned, still within the grip of his arms, and tilted her head up to look at him more carefully, “Don’t be sorry, it’s not your fault.”

[beccajenner-blog]

How could you be so stupid? So insensitive?