beholdtheslug

[beholdtheslug]

My casino has new top-of-the-line technology to stop heists: a montage detector. If those bastards want to break in and steal my money, they’re doing it as part of one, long take

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Logan is a terrible person whose primary issues (failkids) are entirely self-inflicted.

THAT BEING SAID. If I worked my ass off all my life only to realize that, in my efforts, I have given birth to Wealthy Children, I too would be a massive asshole. Like moreso than I was before

[beholdtheslug]

[beholdtheslug]

i’ve only seen a few episodes of four’s era but i found this outtake and i’m fuckinf crying because of it. why does he say it as if that’s his actual line

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I think I was made to be some couple's third. Not really in a romantic sense, more like I'm just There. Haunting their house. Doing chores and paying rent. Lying on their floor. Sleeping in their attic

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[beholdtheslug]

I love that psychic powers are still "allowed" in science fiction. They're an acceptable part of the aesthetic. Like you can't have magic, but you can have brain magic, because it's more Science.

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she weaponized her gag gift im crying

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This 'impossible' crane shot from Mikhail Kalatozov's SOY CUBA (1964) ...

IS the greatest and quite remarkable one shot scene of them all.

[beholdtheslug]

still thinking about that r/hypotheticalsituation post where someone was like "what if a potato chip spawned somewhere randomly in the world. and every hour the number of potato chips at that location would double. and the only way to get rid of them for good would be to eat all of the potato chips before they doubled again." and someone calculated that it would only take like, 48 hours of people ignoring a weird pile of potato chips before an absolutely irreconcilable number of potato chips was blanketing a city.

and then people were like "no wait if it spawns randomly in the world, it's highly likely it would be in an ocean" and then people were debating whether there were enough small fish swimming at the surface in the open ocean that would be able to eat a potato chip and thus save humanity from the potato chip apocalypse.

[beholdtheslug]

Tumblr is a website where the least punk thing you can do is listen to punk, where the queerest game is Dungeons & Dragons because it lets you play as anyone, including a straight man, and where the presence of cishet men is seen as an indicator of the health of a queer community.

[beholdtheslug]

Please universe let something super lesbian happen to me during pride month

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this duck LOVES pink drink

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Need to deploy some sort of mandatory seminar to IT people, "How to make your security upgrade instructions not look like a phishing email"

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i was at an event last night in california and i went to the bar to order wine bc wine was like, a thing, and i looked at the menu and saw i was completely out of my depth bc idk any wine names, so i turned to my right and there was a man in a gorgeous suit standing at the bar beside me and i said “do you know anything about wine?” and he said “a little, yes!” i told him i liked white and dry wines and asked if he’d order for me. he asked the server for two glasses and had one poured for each of us and then he clinked his glass on mine but he didn’t take a sip, he just watched me taste mine and then he asked what i thought and i said “it’s pretty good, but like i said, i wouldn’t know.” he laughed and told me to have a good time & i walked away. fifteen minutes later i found out he’s the winemaker.

[beholdtheslug]

i got this photo with gus from breaking bad and the conversation went like this

me: “hey can you pretend this banana I found outside is a gun?” him: “it is a gun” me: “shit you’re a good actor”