bennyisconfused - Tumblr blog

[bennyisconfused]

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you're welcome

[bennyisconfused]

autistic folks when their routine gets disrupted, and they don't get alone time when they're supposed to get alone time

[bennyisconfused]

sharing my cute outfits on main ❤️

this is my “playing Animal Crossing in the park” outfit ❤️🤠🐮

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ENOUGH ABOUT BOOBS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE FUCKING COMET IS COMING

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(◡‿◡✿)

(ʘ‿ʘ✿) “what you say ‘bout me”

(ʘ‿ʘ)ノ✿ “hold my flower”

[bennyisconfused]

have u ever seen the music video for "Ocean Avenue" by Yellowcard?

^one of the most useless questions on tumblr dot com

ok anyway i was compelled tonight to rewatch this song's music video not only cuz it slaps, but i remember watching it with my sister some years ago and us being baffled about what this music video means

source:

re-familiarize yourself with this barely-sensical emo pop rock cinematic classic and you'll understand my confusion. so...it's a time loop concept. big deal. maybe it doesn't have to make sense and it's just interesting enough on its own to provide a lossely-cohesive storyline carried along by concept rather than by narrative?

and yes that could very much be it, but i was struck with some revelatory thoughts upon my own viewing of it tonight. i won't clog your dash but if you wanna dive in with me, i too have nothing better to do this tuesday night <3

so we all know the art of The Music Video is a pendulum that swings wildly in dozens of directions across several decades -- a music vid making little to no sense isn't the end of the world. sometimes the lyrics don't match what's on the screen at all and life goes on. however, i think i was wrong to assume that of this song and its video. now i don't mean i expected the song's lyrics to be literal; about "green cars" and "women running me over" and "goddamn sidewalk nuns again" but i think that all has a purpose for being in the video, regardless

just as lyrics can contain abstract meaning, music videos can help convey that visually as well. i think this time loop "gag" and the accompanying microgags within them in perpetuity is plenty entertaining, and that's clearly one angle in all of this, and that's great! the worst thing a music video can do is bore you. but i think the implied goofiness or high-concept-ness of it all can lead a viewer to not look as closely into the implied themes of it all. yes, it's great to follow in the storyline-not-storyline kinda way, but drawing critical thematic statements from a man parkouring over a shopping kart full of garbage? that's too fuckin far

except it's not! because like i said: it's all in there for a purpose. just breaking down what we see sequentially, all of it feels disjointed until the time loop clicks after the first chorus. only then, over a third of the way into the song, are we able to start piecing things together. with this, the theme of "cycles/something cyclical" is established. what's this cycle of? what's the intended outcome and how do we get there?

once a loop is established in any story, what's most interesting about it is what changes, and not what actually "loops." upon first run, barreling through Sidewalk Nunz, ragdolling over a shopping kart of trash, we see him pitifully miss the goal: a green muscle car of mysterious rock n roll origin. we loop and we're back on our feet. this time: side spin around the nuns, PARKOUR over the homeless -- that'll show them!! -- and we're a bit ahead of the curve as our hero is mowed down in his emo prime (electric violin continues)

but then it's bridge time! and that means: story development! inside what looks to be the nicest apartment in Newark NJ, a brief case and glasses fit for an eye surgery patient are seen. an attractively lesbionage agent takes them both and attempts to leave. the chase ensues once more, and the nuns are skillfully woven through, the vagabond is High Fived TM respectfully, and the hero successfully intercepts and boards the green muscle car, end of song

so...what's it all mean? well here's my take: it's all about the cyclical nature of self-improvement within the context of partnership. first off, this is supported at least somewhat by the lyrics. everything is very hypothetical and expressing desire for things like nostalgia, a better future, etc. "If I could find you now, things would get better" it's a bittersweet theme that desires for the past and the future, but not the present. typically, times of change or adjustment are what these desires and emotions manifest from. an unsteady or unpleasant "now" could be/would be/should be made better by remembering a better past, or wanting a better future. sadly, one of those things we can never get back, and the other only comes when work is done and change is made.

that's when i was reminded of what changes, literally, within the music video! as we know, time loops exist to be solved and escaped -- see "Groundhogs Day" or "Palm Springs" -- which is the thematic metaphor for what feels like an endless cycle of uncertainty during significant life changes and relationships. within a romantic/relationship context, i view our hero's cyclical journey as a test, some trials he has to figure out the best way to navigate to get to his intended goal. what ways work, which ways don’t? i think this says a lot about the deeper themes being discussed

in a basic sense, the street nuns and the shopping kart are problems or obstacles the hero is facing. since they're metaphorical and intended to have meaning to many viewers, what they are literally is up to you! one obstacle could be handling commitment, it could be with addiction (which can be cyclical as well), the list goes on. but what matters is not what the problems "are," but how the hero gets through them. we know the first attempt was messy and with complete disregard. trying to mosh pit through the nuns only slowed him down, and body slamming the kart looked ineffective at best. clearly, we are being told "You cannot strong arm your way through your problems."

Take 2: my guy jukes out the nuns and gets major air over the kart. while we're meant to think it's effective, clearly all was for nought. the lesson here: "You cannot simply avoid or completely skip over the problems like they don't need to be dealt with." the result of this path being the hero getting what he thought he wanted, only to be hoisted by his own green muscle car about to run him over.

as the final attempt begins, we're given important context that is the driving motivation for our hero. while the woman and the briefcase could be ambiguous in literal meaning as well, they represent loss/the threat of losing something or someone important if our hero can't break the cycle. this happens all too often to real people caught in cycles or constantly-shifting times in life, so the hero's desperation makes sense. but then, after artfully weaving peacefully through the nuns and scoring some Good Person Clout, the hero achieves his goal

the final lesson clearly being: work through the hard stuff. don't brute force it, don't dodge it. make mistakes and learn. learn that it's ok to have hope and want better things for yourself in the future. you might be afraid of losing something important to you along the way, but you can still get better and get things right as long as you keep moving through them.

and i dunno...i think that was a really cool and uplifting message to this song and this music video that i have no idea is there or not intentionally on the part of Yellowcard, but we all know that's not the point of art and music lmao. i found this cool meaning in this cool song/video and i hope you did too! k that's all go to bed

[bennyisconfused]

doing my damnedest to free myself of the “just gotta get through this week” “only x more days til the weekend” mindset & learn to appreciate each day for whatever it is lest i be driven to madness

[bennyisconfused]

You can’t fool me, I know who’s behind this post:

Tips on making your horror game genuinely scary.

Put in a ghoul.

Remember to utilize fundamental human fears, like the fear there might be a ghoul around. Put in a second ghoul.

Undermine the player's sense of safety by introducing something dangerous to areas previously considered safe, such as a third ghoul (in a ghoul-proof room or the like).

Draw on modern social anxieties, such as political radicalization or global warming. You can easily personify these things as, say, a fourth ghoul.

Create a sense of unease by...fuck it, that sounds hard, fifth ghoul.

Sixth ghoul, just in case the first five aren't scary enough.

Create disturbing imagery like a seventh, eighth and ninth ghoul.

Something something sense of powerlessness something something the uncanny something something. Tenth ghoul.

Remember to study the horror greats - King, Poe, Lovecraft. What did they all have in common? All wrote about ghouls probably. Imitate them and put in an eleventh ghoul.

Well, if you have eleven ghouls already, you might as well spring for a full dozen ghouls. That's just good business sense.

Thirteen is the spookiest number! Obviously a thirteenth ghoul would be the scariest thing! Your players will be talking about this for months!

Ok, fine, I guess you could put in a werewolf or shoggoth or something. Just don't blame me when the players are saying "hmm, that was pretty scary, but you know what would have been really terrifying? A fourteenth ghoul!"

Make the game room fit the tone of your game by having sinister music, low lighting and a fifteenth ghoul under the table who will eat anyone who complains about the number of ghouls in the campaign. That'll spook 'em!

Happy spooking and always remember the three rules of horror: ghouls. Ghouls! GHOULS!!!!

[bennyisconfused]

ilove homosexuals i  love bisexuals  i love trans !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yayy ayyayy ayy Weare all sooo ocool

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✞ 666 ✞

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✞ 666 ✞

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✞ 666 ✞

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using words like "wowie!" "yippee!" and "hooray!" unironically have done wonders for joy

[bennyisconfused]

Neither femme nor masc but a third more wicked thing....... Boring

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really cannot emphasise enough that "All Men Bad" and "masculinity is inherently violent, dangerous, and evil" are load-bearing pillars of radfeminism and these ideas cannot have a place in any truly progressive queer theorising.