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Tavernus Updates

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THE LIST☠️

the moment when you want to utterly destroy those who hurt your favorites characters🔥

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Wyll is so fucking funny and no amount of acknowledgement about this could ever be enough. He's literally walking around being so casually hilarious completely under-the-radar. He calls Halsin a "thick hunk of an elf". He once accidently implied that he was fucking an ogre instead of killing it and then proceeded to absolutely stumble his way through explaining. He gets excited by Lae'zel talking about carnal pleasures. He canonically tells his pessimistic thoughts to shut the hell up. He volunteers to babysit Shadowheart's hypothetical werewolf babies as long as she gets him gloves. He tries to give Gale a hero moniker like his own. He jokes that his father, the Grand Duke of Baldur's Gate, can't spell. He calls Astarion "Mister Fangs". He makes up storybook chapter names for his own fucking adventures. As a child he got chased by the Flaming Fist for stealing fruit, nearly drowned trying to find mermaids in the harbor, and almost successfully broke into the Counting House. He reads monster erotica, and is not ashamed to tell you about it. He ranks eating pudding among life's greatest moments. He will, without shame and completely unprompted, meow at you. He is 24 years old.

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HOLY HELLS THEY’RE LITERALLY PERFECT!!! Just a little guy… the exact same expression I imagine for them, too. Pure puppy eyes while coated with the blood of 26388349 enemies (and people who looked at their companions slightly wrong).

Also I’m screaming (with joy) over the red eye and broken horn being on the correct side AND you remembered the Dragonborn-esque horns instead of tiefling… This is the best thing I’ve ever seen. The perfect Tavernus. 10000/10, thank you so much!!!!! 💜💜💜

Fanart for https://archiveofourown.org/works/58271158 ♡

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Coffe date

Inspired by their outfits in the patch 8 animatic

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There are good reasons even most OSR games don't use old-school "declare actions at start of round, then roll initiative with modifiers per action type" rules, but there's a certain je ne sais quoi that's only achieved when you don't know what order your actions are going to go off in until after the wizard says "I cast fireball".

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Shadowheart thinks she’s so edgy and mysterious but deep down inside she is all about the dad jokes.

Bonus:

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Fun Karlach things revealed from party banter/dialogue/cutscenes (these are all 100% canonical to any run, as they are her talking about her past, these all appear in naturally accessable in-game dialogue):

She can touch demons and devils and other infernal creatures without hurting them, but opted not to in those ten years in Avernus as she says she's "not a masochist."*

She has had numerous past relationships, sexual in nature, which she describes as "quick to flare and quick to fade."

She says she was still sorting out "jumping into bed with anything with a pulse" and looking for more long-term relationships when she was sent to Avernus.

There are other infernal creatures running around with infernal engines in them but she thinks she's the only one from Faerun who survived the process (she knows others were tried but didn't make it.)

Loves a good bar fight/brawl (obvious but still cute.)

Likes walking around barefoot in the grass (which she calls "grassing", and she enjoys a good "frolic".)

Isn't keen to travel by boat down the Chionthar (from Moonrise) as her mum said the river was unlucky.

Liked to go swimming as a kid (presumably still does - after she's temperature corrected. Prior to that she mentions fear of boiling fish and her friends alive.)

Worries about being out of date, fashion wise, having been gone from Baulder's Gate for ten years.

Her mother's name is Caerlach (pronounced same as her daughter), and her father's name is Pluck. Their last name, Cliffgate, is the same as one of the lower city entries in Baulder's Gate.

Her dad was a porter and her mom was a laundress. They were poor but loving and fun.

They were poor but NOT destitute - Karlach mentions their household multiple times, and having her friends visit her family in their home. She also went to school (teasing that she'll cheer up Gale by saying she hasn't read "since school").**

When she was a teen her mom passed from illness during a plague when the family couldn't afford a healer quickly enough. Her dad passed a few years after when he was crushed by his own overturned cart on the road.

There's some discrepancy about when she started working for Gortash, in the cemetery she says her parents would have seen him for who he was (implying she did not spend much if any time around him prior to their deaths). In the shadow lands she mentions he 'got his claws into her early' and that she earned enough to help her family move into a better place in the city under his employ (it's entirely possible she's referring to moving their bodies post-mortem though).

She was a young adult (describes herself as 'not-quite-kid') while in Gortash's employ, worked for him for a good span of time, and spent 10 years in Avernus. This means she's likely well into her 30s by the time of game events.

She, to her own admission in her origin, loved Gortash, but also explains that it was not romantic in nature (stating distinctly to the player character "not like that"). She clearly looked up to him as her boss and was deeply betrayed when sold to Zariel.

She lived with her friend Fitz when working for Gortash, who also worked for him at the time. Gortash lied to everyone around her about what happened to her (saying that she moved away suddenly.)

She does note up on meeting Gortash's parents and finding out they sold him to a warlock that he's repeated the same cycle on her.***

Fun fact: "Carlach/Caerlach" in the IRL is a relatively rare Scottish surname likely derived from MacThearlaich ("son of Charles" - typical naming convention dating back to pre- Norman conquest Brittan). Karlach is a very rare spelling of the name and probably was further anglicization on immigration to America (showing up in the 1920s.) As Karlach's mother has the same name as her, spelled differently - one could infer that perhaps her family passed it down in a way that felt more "Bauldrian" to them or was in some way easier to spell.

*Because I've seen this wrong elsewhere - it's not the material plane that's making her untouchable, it's the engine itself. Her engine stops actively hurting her when Raphael teleports you to the House of Hope in Act I - but she's still not touchable without fixing based on this dialogue.

**I've also seen this wrong - Karlach was never an orphaned street urchin and I don't know where people get this impression. Gortash did not "take her in" or mentor her, he was very clearly her boss, albeit one she was friends with and looked up to.

***She does not mean this as a literal one for one, of course, just that someone she trusted sold her to an infernal for his own gain.

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this shit is the only remaining good part of twitter

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some of the kindest people you’ll ever meet are blogging about blood and guts at 10 in the morning

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People used to comment on web comics.

People used to comment on fanfiction.

People used to comment on fanart.

People used to comment on OCs.

I hate "content" culture.

I hate "consuming content" and scrolling immediately to the next thing.

People used to be excited about the art that other people created.

People used to want to share that excitement with creators.

I hate this future.

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It’s dangerous to go alone! Take this skink-Durge with you!

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There are good reasons even most OSR games don't use old-school "declare actions at start of round, then roll initiative with modifiers per action type" rules, but there's a certain je ne sais quoi that's only achieved when you don't know what order your actions are going to go off in until after the wizard says "I cast fireball".

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The Blade of Frontiers (with a sturgeon spiky tail)

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blade of avernus🧡

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If you think about it the relationship between Bhaal and a resist!Durge is basically that Hollywood trope where the dad is like "But son! Football is your dream!" and Durge is like "No, dad. Football is YOUR dream." Except instead of football, it's genocide.

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Tavernus Updates