bi-demon-ium - Tumblr blog

[bi-demon-ium]

If your unfuckable champion is not Elias Bouchard, Larry Butz, or Luo Binghe, they only have 1 submission!

Number of submissions isn't the only criteria to be accepted into the tournament, but it's probably the easiest way to qualify, unless you want to gamble on me agreeing with your reasoning or thinking you have shown enough enthusiasm to make me want to include a character who only one person seems to care about. If you want to have greater chances of slandering your champion's pussy's name in public, I'd recommend getting more people involved!

Submissions are still open, so make sure to spread the word and convince others to campaign for the dustiness of your fave's genitals! Love y'all!

[bi-demon-ium]

he's a detective, he's a lady, he's 39, he's a child, he's got one eye, he's a sharpshooter, he's a short king, he's a sewer rat, he's a badass, he's pathetic, he's the world's best and worst boss, he's a monster, he's a hero, he does NOT know how to use a phone, he DOES know how to solve complicated political cases. he's a sulky baby. he's a killer.

[bi-demon-ium]

he's a detective, he's a lady, he's 39, he's a child, he's got one eye, he's a sharpshooter, he's a short king, he's a sewer rat, he's a badass, he's pathetic, he's the world's best and worst boss, he's a monster, he's a hero, he does NOT know how to use a phone, he DOES know how to solve complicated political cases. he's a sulky baby. he's a killer.

[bi-demon-ium]

me when i wanna talk about my special interests but i got the vampire autism where you gotta invite me to talk about smth first, otherwise i wont say shit or dont know what to say because i feel like im annoying

[bi-demon-ium]

Welcome to the Can't Fuck Bracket, where YOU vote for the character who has the most unfuckable swag

Do you love characters that don't fuck? Characters whose dicks would make U-turns and whose pussies would clamp itselves shut if they ever came close to performing a sexual act? Characters who would try to fuck and end up leaving snot all over their poor partner? Characters who have never ever ever made their partner cum? Well, this bracket is for you!

Submit and vote for YOUR favorite unfuckable characters and let's find out who Tumblr crowns the least fuckable of them all!

Rules and clarifications:

"Can't fuck" is different from "doesn't want to fuck". This is about characters who either suck at sex or could never find a willing partner, not asexual/sex-repulsed characters

This is also not about being a virgin or inexperienced, this is for characters who could fuck a billion times and would still suck at it

You can submit both your beloved blorbos who have 0 game and characters you hate with a passion

"Can't fuck" can mean both "could never find a willing partner" and "would suck shit ass in bed". It's up to you

Last year's contestants are only eligible if they did not make it past the group stage. So check that your submission isn't featured in this post to make sure they're eligible!

Goofy from Disney will also not be accepted. I've seen things I can't unsee

No real people unless they've been dead for at least 100 years.

"Being dead" is not in itself a reason to be considered unfuckable, otherwise this would become a deadguybracket 2.0. It's fine if that's mentioned but it can't be the only reason

Propaganda is not only encouraged, I'd say it's the whole point! You can tag me in it and I'll reblog it

Be nice to each other and also to me. I'm just making a silly little poll. It's not life and death. Also I have other things going on in my life

You can diss your opponents if you want but practice common sense when doing so

And that's all... For now! You can use this form to submit your characters! Go crazy go stupid!

[bi-demon-ium]

i really like this deep leffen tweet

[bi-demon-ium]

Psych was correct. When you're 100% sure of your conclusion, but it's based off of evidence that only you can see (because it's obscure, easily dismissed, or requires a lot of prior context), it's genuinely better to just say "I had a psychic vision" or something like that. People are more willing to believe you have mystical powers than that they just missed something you found obvious.

[bi-demon-ium]

arms tied above head wins horniest arrangement at torturers' choice awards

[bi-demon-ium]

you cant ever let yourself forget what it felt like to be 15. how adults treated you. being treated without a shred of respect because people think youre too young to have thoughts and feelings of your own. the lack of autonomy. you cant ever forget that because if you do you might become the kind of adult who treats kids like theyre not people

[bi-demon-ium]

I hate how acknowledging unfairness in the world is seen as "childish". Maybe children are right. I don't think you should be proud of the fact that you've become complacent with the state of your miserable existence and took on this loser "it is what it is" mentality. Things can be better.

[bi-demon-ium]

for the intimidation emojis, when i was first getting to know u/seeing u around fandom circles u were maybe fox emoji bc i thought u were so cool but now u are my friend not intimidating at all :)

<33333333 !!!!!!

[bi-demon-ium]

For me I think you went from 🐯 to 🐭 since I first saw your blog to now

you know what? that tracks.

[bi-demon-ium]

#You're just so accomplished and prolific and talented#You know so much#And I would be so sad if you hated me so I had to tread carefully

sophie that is so sweet. also accomplished and prolific and talented? are you SURE?

🐻 for “MOTHER OF GOD PLEASE DON’T EAT ME–” when I first started looking at your blog, but we're getting to 🦊 for fairly intimidating now

SOPHIE LOVE I AM BASICALLY A TRIBBLE

[bi-demon-ium]

🐻 for “MOTHER OF GOD PLEASE DON’T EAT ME–” when I first started looking at your blog, but we're getting to 🦊 for fairly intimidating now

SOPHIE LOVE I AM BASICALLY A TRIBBLE

[bi-demon-ium]

🐱

Send 🐱 for moderately intimidating

gasp?? i'm flattered (?) but also please dont be intimidated i'm a fucking. dork

[bi-demon-ium]

hes ur “emotional support blorbo”??? girl he cant even emotionally support Himself

[bi-demon-ium]

How Intimidating Am I?

Send 🐹 for “You? Intimidating? Hell no.”

Send 🐰 for barely intimidating

Send 🐭 for slightly intimidating

Send 🐱 for moderately intimidating

Send 🦊 for fairly intimidating

Send 🐯 for very intimidating

Send 🐻 for “MOTHER OF GOD PLEASE DON’T EAT ME–”