Perry the Platypus and Dr. Doofenshmirtz are gay and no one can tell me otherwise.
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I think a big part of the reason I love cryptids is that they’re literally the only subgenre of conspiracy theories where you can be reasonably assured it isn’t secretly about hating Jews. Like, when people talk about aliens or lizard people or sinister banking cabals, at least 80% of the time when you look up the foundational literature it’s a bunch of Antisemitic rot and “lizard people” is just a codephrase for “Jews”, but there are very few neo-Fascist whackjobs out there claiming that Bigfoot is Jewish.
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Reblog if you’re STD FREE
This is actually more important than all of the freak, nasty, and sex filled porn post on here. Hopefully this gets a lot of Reblogs. Know your status
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“But if you forget to reblog Madame Zeroni, you and your family will be cursed for always and eternity.”
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we know plankton and krabs have been playing poker together for 15 years
we also know this episode aired before the episode where pearl turned 16
while the non-continuity & non-chronological order of the series means that assuming that pearl was 15 in welcome to the chum bucket is a fool’s gamble - it’s reasonable enough that if there is an episode about her turning 16, her character was likely conceptualized as being 15 years old prior to that point. but either she was 15 or she was 16 in welcome to the chum bucket … and either way, that’s about as long as pearl’s been alive.
we also know that pearl is krabs’ biological daughter … through a combination of facts … and were given reason to believe that something happened to the mother of his child shortly after pearl’s birth that made him depressed. she’s not around anymore and no longer apart of their lives in any way shape or form.
we also know plankton and krabs were childhood best friends, going on to have an on-again-off-again friendship for years prior to spongebob getting a job at the krusty krab … and the two are shown to occasionally have moments where they truly, genuinely care about each other deep down, despite the rivalry …
conclusion: plankton might have started playing poker with krabs to cheer him up after the death of his wife
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This is the payday meowth, reblog in the next 24 hours and money will come your way!!
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@staff awful people. If you wanted boring facebook people to come here, you shoulda called it “facebook 2″. harming sex workers and you know it. get off the earth. she doesn’t want you
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Simple Protection Amulet
This is an enchantment spell I wrote a while ago for that lil extra protection boost. I’ve done this spell three times, for three different people (including myself), and it’s worked every time. This spell is especially good for baby witches and closet witches. Keep in mind that this isn’t a super strong spell, it’s kind of like the first piece of armour you buy in a video game. Although it’s not particularly powerful, it’s definitely one of my favourite charms - I like to take it with me when I go travelling, or when I stay the night at someone’s house, so that if I start sensing negative energies I can wear it and have some instant protection magic happening! (note: i have included extra steps for wiccans - just ignore them if you’re not wiccan; although obviously, wiccans are fully-welcome to use the non-wiccan method if they wish to do so)
⛥ gather: black pepper (protection, inner strength, warding), whole cloves (protection, curse-breaking), salt (protection), any protective crystal (e.g. snowflake obsidian, fire agate, black tourmaline, etc; this item is optional), a small bowl, a necklace* to enchant
⛥ cast a circle, if you wish to (totally optional)
⛥ if you’re wiccan, call upon the god and goddess, and give them an offering (e.g. seeds, bread, fresh juice) and ask for them to assist you with this spell
⛥ mix the pepper, cloves and salt together in a bowl - the person who will be wearing the amulet should stir using their finger (on their dominant hand) to mix in their energies
⛥ next, the person who will be wearing the amulet should bury the necklace in the mixture
⛥ wave your hand over the bowl once, anti-clockwise, and say: wiccan version i ask the God and the Goddess, the all-father and all-mother, to bless this necklace, so that the wearer, (say name), may be protected from ill & injury. witch version by cleansing salt and earth-grown herb, beware, destructive beings of woe! you are kept from (wearer’s name), by this object’s midnight glow ⛥ wave your hand over the bowl once, clockwise, to seal the spell
⛥ (wiccans, thank the god & goddess and dismiss them)
⛥ you can now remove the amulet from the bowl, and dispose of the herbs/salt inside (keeping the crystal, obviously)
*it should be noted that any other piece of jewelry can be used: a ring, a bracelet, earrings, a brooch, etc.
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~10 Kinds Of Magical Books~
1. Book Of Shadows- A witch’s book of spells, rituals, personal feelings, etc. It is a general book for any metaphysical or religious information that you wish to put into it, among other things.
2.Bestiary- A sometimes hand-written encyclopedia or manual of mythological and magical creatures and beings, used for reference when you want to work with a non-human energy, or for general research.
3.Grimoire- Usually filled with tables and charts, lists relating to astrological, numerical, and color correspondences; properties of crystals, herbs, trees, etc. Contains moon phase meanings and medicinal properties of plants- This one has an old-timey textbook feel to it, usually.
4.Book Of Mirrors- a special journal, where you ‘reflect’ on things going on in your day to day life, providing deep insights which are invaluable when you’re doing work regarding personal growth. Very helpful with developing personal spiritual philosophies.
5.Book Of Moons- A book entirely relating to the moon and it’s cycles, names of the moons of each month, their attributes and energies, dates of lunar eclipses as well as full moon dates of upcoming moons. Filled with vast knowledge of lunar attributes and special dates of red moons, blue moons, etc.
6.Dream Journal- Here you record the dreams you have in as much detail as you can remember, and some people draw images from their dream adventures in this book as well, since dreams use the language of symbolism and imagery. You interpret the meanings of your dreams in here too, if you wish. Dreams can help us get a glimpse into our subconscious and the more dreams you write the easier it becomes for you to remember them.
7. Book of Visions- A vision book is used with the law of attraction, it is a ‘vision board’ in book form. Put different images of things you want in life, be they experiences, physical items, money, health, etc, in the pages of the book. Open the book up to pictures of what you want to visualize having. Think of this as an on-the-go vision board, except with much more space as there are so many pages!
8.Book Of Positive Aspects- At the top of each page you write the name of a topic that you are unhappy with, like ‘the workplace’ for example. Below the topic title you begin listing all the positive aspects of the subject, and by the end of your list your emotions will be in a much better place regarding the topic. You can do a list a day or many in one sitting, it is a valuable tool for cultivating positive energy or for switching viewpoints on things that normally would upset you.
9.Gratitude Journal- A book where you write about EVERYTHING you are thankful and appreciative for in your life right now. You feel overwhelmed with love and positivity when writing in this book, which aids you in raising your vibration and frequency.
10. Book Of Intuitions- a psychic journal, it’s a book where all divination and psychic exercises are recorded, ranging from full tarot spreads, to tea leaf readings, even psychic impressions you pick up off people. It’s handy for tracking progress as well as for record keeping.
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Just an experiment. Reblog if you actually give a fuck about male victims of domestic violence and rape.
Of fucking course
What sick bastard doesn’t
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basic ass witch tips 🔮
on some kind of medication, including but not limited to hormonal birth control, heart medication, and anti-depressants? you better double check with your doctor or pharmacist before you drink that new tea you just bought.
always, always, always tell your doctor or check with your pharmacist before trying any kind of herbal supplement, whether it’s something you made yourself or something you bought at the store.
have sensitive skin? dilute your essential oils before putting them anywhere near your skin or in your bathtub.
have a diagnosed medical condition? talk. to. your. doctor. before ingesting anything or putting anything on your body that you aren’t familiar with.
don’t. drink. essential. oils. essential oils are not consumable!!!!!
don’t put citrus oil on your skin and then go out into the sun unless you want a badass chemical burn.
don’t put any kind of damn essential oil on your skin without diluting it with a carrier oil. almond oil? olive oil? coconut oil? i don’t care. dilute your essential oils.
don’t put essential oils on your animals, diluted or not, point blank.
oh, and don’t put fucking crystals in their water bowls to “cleanse their chakras” or whatever the fuck.
speaking? of crystals? don’t put crystals in your bodily orifices. don’t put crystals in your own damn water. just don’t.
thinking about burning some kind of random herb in your house? you better make sure it’s not gonna release noxious fumes and murder your family.
speaking of random herbs - got the urge to forage for some herbs out in the wild? wear. fucking. gloves.
don’t burn incense or herbs around your pets. they have tiny, fragile respiratory systems and are super sensitive to that kinda shit.
gotta burn a candle down completely for a spell? you better not leave that shit unattended unless you want a house fire.
always. practice. fire. safety. that means, don’t go burning shit outside during a burn ban.
gods help me - if you wanna harvest your own blood via finger stick, stay away from dirty safety pins and needles and invest in some lancets.
drinking dirty water from outside can literally give you worms. boil your damn water.
oh yeah. moon water. everyone loves to make moon water. you know what happens when you leave a jar of water at room temperature? it stagnates and grows bacteria. refrigerate that shit.
fresh herbs or other things of that nature left at room temperature can also grow super harmful bacteria, for example, raw garlic submerged in oil at room temperature is a breeding ground for botulism and mold.
edited on october 27, 2018
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This is potentially life saving information everyone should know.
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How to Create Spells
☆~Spellcraft for Beginners~☆
Since magic is such a personal and individualized practice, you may find that your best spells will be ones you’ve written and performed yourself. This may sound complicated, but it’s only as simple (or ornate) as you’d like to make it.
Step 1.
Start by getting a clear idea of your goal and get a mental image of what that will look like (ex, for a happiness, you would want a clear vision of yourself being happy going about your daily activities). This is arguably the most important part; you can’t have a successful spell if you don’t know what it means for it to be a success. Meditate on it, describe it in detail, but don’t begin anything until you have a firm idea in your head.
Step 2.
After this, decide what type of spell you want to create. A candle spell for a quick result, or something to carry for long-term use? Do you want it to be simple, like more general happiness in your life, or more in depth, like to earn a specific job position by the end of the month? Try to oriente your spell to be themed to your goal.
Here are a couple popular methods to get you started:
🔮 Candle Spells
- Small candle = quick results, short term, but only a small burst of power
- Medium candles = burned over a few sessions, gives the spell length, effects last longer, but typically slows down the appearance of immediate results
- Large candles = burned in sessions over weeks or months, contains much more power, lasts much longer, but can take the most time before results are seen
🔮 Sachets, Charms, Enchanted Jewelry
- Sachets, herb pillows, etc. are quick to make and are designed for a slow release of magic over time
- Charms usually have an inherently magical function making it unnecessary to charge them, but while they last the longest, they are usually not as powerful as other spells
- Enchanting jewelry or tokens mimics a charm, which makes them easy to disguise and mundane objects with secret magical functions, but they must be periodically recharged to retain their magic
🔮 Cord/Knot Magic
- String/cord is an excellent symbol for many things, making it an ideal representation. For example, in a binding, you could tie a black string around a doll or poppet to symbolize the magic “tying them up”. You can also tie it to yourself and a symbol of someone else to link you two, or tie it and cut it to break a bond with someone.
- Knots are excellent tools for storing magic and energy until it is time to be released. This way, you could put a spell (like a spell for money) into the cord and tie a knot, and then later, when you need that money, you can untie the knot to release the magic of the spell.
🔮 Verbal/Written Spells
- Verbal power can be the strongest method of channeling, your voice and your words are sacred and can be used to summon a lot of your power. Chanting, singing, performing poetry, reading spells aloud, or simply speaking your intent in a commanding way can be a spell all it’s own. You may feel shy at first, but many witches over time develop what can be called their “Summoner’s Voice” which is a very serious, powerful manner of speaking that you only use to cast magic, which makes it uniquely powerful.
- Written spells are just as powerful, because it is still using words and language, which contain the natural power of change. Writing out a spell, poem, song, affirmation (ex, “I am healthy”), prayer, etc. can be a stand-alone spell as well. You can also sleep on your writing, place magical items on the page, or especially burn it to release its magic.
Step 3.
Decide if you want to add anything to your spell to add energy to it. Performing only verbal spells can be very efficient, but it is also terribly exhausting as it draws entirely on your energy.
Spell ingredients are added so that some of the energy added comes from something other than you. Herbs, crystals, metals, etc. all vibrate with their own energy which, if added properly, can contribute to your spell and make it stronger/last longer/go into effect faster/etc.
To figure out if something will be beneficial to your spell, you can try to sense it’s vibrations or look up common associations. For example, if you are doing a love spell, you could look up and find that yarrow and rose quartz both commonly resonate with love, which would make both of them suitable for your spell.
Ideas for what to add to your spell to make it stronger:
🔮 Crystals are so popular in witchcraft because there are a lot of them vibrating with lots of different frequencies, giving you lots of options for what to use for your spell. Set them in designs, put them on top of your written spells or sigils, add them to spell bags, or even just hold them during your spell and carry them afterwards to help give your spell focus.
🔮 Herbs function like crystals, but unfortunately can’t be recharged as well. However, they pack more initial energy and typically have more specific associations (ex, whereas rose quartz may just resonate with love in general, an herb like black medic might be as specific as “love, but only between young adults which ends up leading more to separate self-discovery and individual growth than to holy matrimony”). The downside to herbs, as amazing as they are, is that they demand A LOT of studying to be used properly. Herbs can be very dangerous, especially when taken internally, and require as much attention, education, and caution as chemicals and medication. (For example, if someone you know has Crohn’s Disease, and you as the witch look up associations for stomach pain, arriving at chamomile to help soothe their stomach, they could end up in the ER with severe stomach cramps. Many herbs conflict with medications, especially antidepressants, sleep medication, and birth control, so read and study and above all TALK TO YOUR GODDAMNED DOCTOR IF YOU WANT TO GET ON HERBAL SUPPLEMENTS OR WANT TO INGEST HERBS AS PART OF YOUR PRACTICE.)
🔮 Insence that you associate with your goal, or if you don’t/can’t use fire, use scented water or oil warmers can add a great boost to the spell, and can be designated and lit continuously afterwards to keep energy going into the spell if it is long-term.
🔮 Oils (acting like concentrated versions of the herb) can be more potent than the dried plant. Use it as incense, to anoint yourself or your tools to give them a boost. (Use extreme caution, oil extracts can cause serious harm if you don’t research them first!)
🔮 Colors can be used to your advantage as well! Color assocations are very personal, however, so be sure to only use a color if it actually evokes the desired feelings out of you. For example, if you’re doing a spell for stress relief, and green relaxes you, use green candles, cloths, or crystals even if most spells would call for blue.
Step 4.
Choosing where and when to perform your spell can give more power to your spell. A spell for releasing emotional baggage would do well performed on the full moon, and a spell to become more beautiful would have the most help in spring. Some spells happen spontaneously, when you couldn’t care less what planet is in which house or what day of the week it is, and this is perfectly fine as well. Sometimes waiting too long to perform a spell can kill the momentum you had when writing it, but some spells need a lot of planning.
Some things you can consider:
- Moon phase
- Astrological calendar
- Days of the week
- Days of the month/year
- Time of year
- Holidays
- Time of day/night
- Personal anniversaries
- Weather
Time and date can have personal associations as well, so while some people associate fall with the end of a cycle, you may see it as the original beginning.
Again, your spells can be as simple or as complicated as you want. They don’t have to fit any template or style. This is just to get you started and to help you along when you’re first starting, but you’ll realise the more you practice that you do have your own style and method and associations, and that will lend your spells the basic power they would be nothing without~☆

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Crystals that are NOT suitable for placing in water / making gem water
This list will explain common stones that are either toxic to use for drinking in gem water or stones that are soluble in water. :)
Alunite: Non toxic but soluble in water
Anglesite: Toxic and slightly soluble in water
Arsenopyrite: Potentially toxic
Azurite: Harmful
Azurite-Malachite: Harmful
Azurite-Pseudomalachite: Harmful
Bunsenite: Toxic; allergen; avoid skin contact
Calomel: Possibly hazardous to health
Cerussite: Toxic
Chalcanthite: Harmful; easily soluble in water
Cinnabar: Very toxic!
Cinnabar-Opal: The cinnabar stored in the opal is toxic
Crocoite: Toxic
Cuprite: Harmful
Durangite: Potentially toxic
Eclipse Stone: Limestone with orpiment, toxic
Eilat Stone: Harmful
Erythrite: Potentially toxic
Fiedlerite: Toxic
Fluorite, Antozonite variety: Potentially harmful
Galenite: Toxic and slightly soluble in water
Gaspeite: Harmful; allergen; avoid skin contact
Greenockite: Toxic
Halite: Not toxic in small quantities, but dissolves easily in water
Iron-nickel Meteorite: Harmful; allergen; avoid skin contact
Jamesonite: Potentially toxic
Lemon Chrysoprase: Potentially harmful; allergen; avoid skin contact
Lopezite: Very toxic! Hazardous even through skin contact
Malachite: Harmful
Millerite: Toxic; allergen; avoid skin contact
Minium: Toxic
Nickeline: Toxic; allergen; avoid skin contact
Olivenite: Potentially toxic
Orpiment: Toxic
Proustite: Potentially toxic
Psilomelane and Pyrolusite: Harmful
Pyromorphite: Potentially toxic
Rauenthalite: Toxic
Realgar: Toxic. Store in dark, securely locked place.
Scorodite: Potentially toxic
Sphaerocobaltite: Harmful; allergen; avoid skin contact
Stibnite: Harmful
Tetrahedrite: Potentially harmful
Ulexite: Non toxic but slightly soluble in warm water
Valentinite and Senarmontite: Harmful
Vanadinite: Toxic
Wulfentie: Potentially toxic
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