billieeeeeee

[billieeeeeee]

Don’t Worry ‘Bout It Ma’am...It’s Just Them Damn Yankees

Literally recorded on the very first day of the 90′s, “High Enough” would portend absolutely nothing about what music would be about in the coming decade. It sits more like an epilogue to twenty years of power ballads, and its three writers (Shaw from Styx, Blades from Night Ranger and of course the Nuge) combined their individual talents to create something which I think stands as the crowning achievement of the genre. I’ve been an unapologetic, pretentious music snob for my entire adult life and even I can’t deny the sheer genius of “High Enough”. So put on your mirrored sunglasses, take off your shirt and grab a zebra patterned guitar....I want to take you high enough. I want to fly you over yesterday.

Song Structure

Grade: A-

When I was listening to this back in the day, I had no clue about what was going on musically in this song. After looking through tabs and reading up on it, there is actually a whole lot going on here. Tons of chords and key changes and a surprisingly modest solo from Nugent. Here is the rundown:

Intro

Verse

Pre-Chorus

Chorus

Verse

Pre-Chorus

Chorus

Bridge

Solo

Pre-Chorus

Chorus x2

Ok, pretty standard formula there. Now, here is a list of all the chords used throughout:

Asus2, F#m11, Esus4, E, Dsus2, F, G, Am, Asus4, D, A, Bm, Em, Gadd9, A/C#, B, C#m, F#m, B/D#

Wow, ok. That’s a lot of chords. Turns out there are so many chords because the verse, pre-chorus and chorus are each in separate keys. The verse is in A major, the pre-chorus is in C major and the chorus is in D major. Oh yeah, and then the song switches to E major for the guitar solo. But good old Ted even put his own spin on that. Here is Tommy Shaw’s explanation:

“Like if you listen to the solo on ‘High Enough,’ the solo is in E, but [Nugent] plays the solo in C-sharp minor. So he’s playing it in the minor third of E and I didn’t even realize it. I was like, ‘How is he playing that? Where is that coming from?’”

Sometimes when there is all this hocus pocus music theory going on in a song, it can sound clunky or forced. But everything here flows seamlessly. I have docked them a little bit for a somewhat weak bridge. I really love a good bridge in a song and this one seems like kind of an afterthought. But it’s short and it does its job which is to lead us up to Nugent’s wah-drenched but tasteful solo. He rips out something not too flashy, not too messy, not too “shreddy” and it fits well in the context of the song.

Lyrics

Grade: D+

So obviously no one here was trying to give Dylan a run for his money. The lyrics are a fairly consistent string of one terrible cliche after another.

“And I don't want to live without you anymore. Can't you see I'm in misery? And you know for sure I would live and die for you And I'd know just what to do when you call me baby.”

Ouch. I’m dying to know what in the hell he would do when she called him baby. Take his sunglasses off, maybe?

“I was running I was running for the door The next thing I remember I was running back for more Ooh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.”

We’ve all been there, dude.

And I always just assumed the subject matter here populated the same universe as millions of other songs where the guy and girl’s relationship is vaguely problematic and the guy is writing moon-June-spoon lyrics about it on a napkin at a bar somewhere. But then Jack Blades gives a peek behind the scenes:

“'High Enough' was about how you love someone so much and you just don't want to scare them away. And it's like, do I take the next step? And then she freaks out when you go, 'I love you.' And it's like, 'What!?!? I'm outta here!' And you're, 'Wait a minute! Come back!' But then the girl comes back, because in the bridge it's, (singing) 'The next thing I remember I was running back for more.' You know how you get scared at first when you fall in love, and everybody freaks out, and that can't be right. And then you go, Wait a minute, this is great, let's forget about the past. Can you fly me over yesterday? Can you take me high enough to fly me over yesterday?”

Um...what in the fuck are you talking about, dude? He continues...

"It's not something that's really cool, or something that's really a big thing, it's just something that happens that I do. Like I drive a car – except I come up with rhymes," he said. "I don't look at it as anything special. It's just how I've been all my life, so I don't see it as something really unique and amazing.”

Phew. I’m glad we’re all on the same page here, Jack.

The Video

Grade: A+

What can I say? The song stands on its own merits, but this video cements its place in music legend. The best part is Ted hamming up every single microsecond of screen time he gets, chomping on gum the whole time and just waiting for his solo where he is rendered impervious to bullets by the sheer power of his guitar. Watch below and don’t say goodbye, say you’re gonna stay forever.....whoa whoa, all the way.

[billieeeeeee]

Huey Lewis Large Penis

I usually spend the twenty minutes before I leave work doing what the kids today call “using the Internet”. It’s fun and I enjoy winding down after a long day. Usually, this involves mindless wanderings around the World Wide Web, viewing videos and/or looking at unbelievably funny pictures and amassing a large inventory of simple household hacks that will blow my mind in the event that I ever wind up trying any of them. Which, of course, I have no intention of doing but I thirst for knowledge in all forms and I’ll be damned if I get shown up at the office when the computer cables are a tangled mess and that idiot Daryl wows the place with his bread bag tie trick. Fuck Daryl. I hate him. Anyway, the other night I found myself watching the Obama Phone Lady video on YouTube about seven or eight times. I don’t know why. It’s not a source of humor for me. Sometimes I just need to affirm to myself the dark path of our universe so I do things like that. When I was a kid, we had the big satellite in our yard that was always beaming in weird ass programming. Like the university that would broadcast surgeries in progress. I’d be glued to that for hours and not in some fascination with gore but more as a forbidden glimpse into the real reality of things. As they sliced open chests and pried open rib cages I would watch the unknown organs slip and slide around while the anonymous latex hands clipped and cut out the bad things. I would remind myself that all of those slimy bags of flesh were inside me as well, and that one day they may not work correctly. After several viewings of the Obama Phone Lady, I was thinking about Cleveland. For some reason, I think of Huey Lewis whenever I hear about Cleveland. Probably because of the lyrics to Heart of Rock and Roll, which is from a time when musicians worried themselves silly about whether Rock and Roll would be alright. The 80’s were kind of a nightmare for Rock and Roll and Huey Lewis had every right to try and put everyone at ease about the long term outlook for Rock. I remembered a lady on Howard Stern who had slept with a bunch of rockers and she told Howard that Huey Lewis had the largest cock she’d ever seen. And this lady was no spring chicken, she’d been sexually active with the rhythm section of Foreigner and once had an orgy with ZZ Top and a camel, I think. Regardless, she knew dick and giving Huey such an honor was quite impressive. I decided to check Huey’s Wikipedia page to perhaps get some verification of this. Astonishingly, there was not one mention of his enormous penis on his page. I’d like to think that if I had a large penis and was famous enough to have a Wikipedia page, my dick would have its own section. That’s the way I would want it. Early Life, Career, Legal Troubles, Personal Life, Enormous Cock, References. In that order. So there I was, left high and dry and still wanting more information about Huey Lewis’s dick. In my time of need, I turned to Google. “Huey Lewis large penis”. The search results surpassed even my greatest expectations, and it now seemed absolutely certain that Huey Lewis does in fact have a gigantic cock. And then I felt the calm peace settle inside of me once again. The knowledge that everything in the universe is exactly as it should be, and that if I die in a fiery car crash on the way home, my loved ones will be comforted by the fact that my last known interaction with the world was “Huey Lewis large penis”.

[billieeeeeee]

Why Nobody Should Ever Write Me A Love Song

Girl in Paramore: "Hey, it's me. The girl in Paramore. I'm your girlfriend." Guy: "Wow, so cool. You're totes hot." Girl in Paramore: "I know. I wrote a song about our love, baby." Guy: "So awesome, baby. Rock it out for me." Girl in Paramore: "Ok, baby. It goes like this..." Can't count the years on one hand That we've been together I need the other one to hold you Make you feel, make you feel better [Translation: I have trouble counting even when using my fingers. Also, you have terrible balance and it only compounds my confusion.] It's not a walk in the park To love each other But when our fingers interlock, Can't deny, can't deny you're worth it 'Cause after all this time I'm still into you [Our relationship kind of sucks the majority of the time. Occasionally I forget this and convince myself that you're slightly better than loneliness.] I should be over all the butterflies [Because you're extremely boring and a constant disappointment.] But I'm into you (I'm into you) And baby even on our worst nights I'm into you (I'm into you) [Again, this relationship is toxic but I'm scared of being forced to deal with my personal insecurities on my own.] Let 'em wonder how we got this far 'Cause I don't really need to wonder at all Yeah, after all this time I'm still into you [Everyone around us knows we are doomed.] Recount the night that I first met your mother [All of your terrible life choices instantly made sense after five minutes with that woman.] And on the drive back to my house I told you that, I told you that I loved ya [Worst mistake of my life, honestly.] You felt the weight of the world Fall off your shoulder [You were thrilled that your mother didn't ruin yet another relationship for you.] And to your favorite song We sang along to the start of forever And after all this time I'm still into you [Still creeped out that you made me sing Fly by Sugar Ray with you.] Some things just, some things just make sense And one of those is you and I (Hey) Some things just, some things just make sense And even after all this time (Hey) [This part actually makes no sense, I just needed a bridge, baby.] I'm into you, baby, not a day goes by That I'm not into you [I really mean it, baby. I'm super into you.] 'Cause I don't really need to wonder at all Yeah, after all this time I'm still into you I'm still into you I'm still into you [I almost believe it at this point, baby.]