bingobrain - Tumblr blog

[bingobrain]

13/04/2017 - 20:41 Round one.

Dark Tracks Someone once showed me a photograph, and within a few seconds I realised the image was of me. But it wasn’t me at all. Well, not physically, because it was a picture of a fucking steam train. Stay with me and I’ll try to explain. I’ll start with the photo itself. The train is silhouetted by evening sunlight, sweeping from left to right. This is perfectly irrelevant. The sky is a shade of blue that could hurt the soul on a down day and keep you alive on others. This is relevant, but holds no significance for you, I’m sure. In the right half of the photo the sun has lit the clouds in a mock apocalypse of vibrant fire; a God-nuke of beauty bursting into being, and rising. But the train, a dark snake of snide carriages, rolls in, meeting orange with black and leeching colour, sucking up life and rasping it up and out in a plume of dirty, oily smog. And I look at it and think, that’s you, you cunt: gliding through life, sucking up goodness and beauty and churning it into noxious poisons. I found the image on google, having decided it was my life in visual metaphor, and now use it as the background for my phone. People see it. Colleagues and arseholes you don’t know or care for. And they mention it, chirping up and grinning, saying ‘What a lovely picture! Did you take it?’ I tell them I didn’t, and then what it means to me. And in some dark avenue of my mind I find sly jubilation as they wander off, shocked, and I watch their sunny cloud turn to smoke behind me. ----------------

[bingobrain]

13/04/2017 - 20:40 Round one.

“Everything is fine, Macaulay.” “Stop calling me that! We agreed to codenames only once we’d started!” I looked at the man I and the rest of the world knew as Macaulay Culkin. His right eye twitched just a little at the corner and his lip was quivering. 3 weeks I’d been with him, planning this bat shit job and now, right now, was time he had elected to have a freaking meltdown. “He knows, man; I just know it!” “Lockjaw,” I started, referring to him by the bizarre nickname he had chosen, “Listen; the motherfucker’s only like 8 years old. How would he know something? You ever talk to an 8 year old? They don’t know shit.” “I just got this feeling, man.” He ran his fingers through his air and reached for a cigarette, his hand shaking as he lit it. “Look,” I said, reaching out and clasping his shoulder, “Truth of it is this is your gig; you say we’re out and we’re out. We can come back another time and whack the little prick. But think on this; you came to me with this plan. This Home Alone remake starts shooting next week. Once he’s on set he’ll be way more difficult to get. And after that, when the movie’s out? He’ll be in the public eye and impossible to get close to! Then, he’ll be the kid from Home Alone, not you. And then all those conventions and birthday parties or whatever it is you do; all that’ll be gone. Even if we whack him after that, he’ll still be the kid from Home Alone. It’s gotta be now.” Macaulay’s breathing slowed, like he was inhaling my words. His shaking stopped as he took a long drag from his cigarette. His eyes narrowed into a determined stare. “Alright; let’s do it.” He reached into the glove compartment and pulled out the snub nose he’d been practicing with. He pulled the balaclava on and got out of the car. “Remember!” I shouted after him, “One shot to the head, empty the rest into his body. Then drop the gun and leave quickly; understand?” “I got it.” “Get going then.” I watched as he made his way to the front door of the house. The kid’s parents had left it unlocked when they’d gone to the store. Kid was in his bedroom. This wouldn’t take long. Five minutes pass then I heard six shots from the house. Damn. He actually did it. I turned the ignition, and revved up the car, screeching down the street and away from the house. I looked in my rear view and saw a blood splattered Macaulay running down the street after me. No fucking way was I getting mixed up in this; I just wanted to see if he would so it. Sure, a kid was dead and I probably could have stopped it but c’mon; the old kid from Home Alone kills the new kid from Home Alone? Shit is hilarious.