birdie-told-me - Tumblr blog

[birdie-told-me]

[birdie-told-me]

You know that trope where the author is like the Small Appalachian Town Church is actually worshipping something Far More Ancient Than Christ? The implication being that Christ isn't real but this old Eldritch thing is real.

Like, who cares if some little holler town has a Real God. The Christians ran Europe for like a thousand years. I feel like your Eldritch Horror has to be scarier than the idea of the Borgias.

[birdie-told-me]

bapping you with my soft wittle paws until naught but ash and dust remains

[birdie-told-me]

If you're struggling to write sex, write food. if you're struggling to write food, write gore. if you're struggling to write gore, write sex. They're all variations on the same themes.

[birdie-told-me]

goodnight my friends 

i hope i have good dreams 

[birdie-told-me]

Returning to Tumblr simply to point how the cast of Game Changer is like no other. This interview is wild.

[birdie-told-me]

Ludwig von Hofmann - Southern rocky coast (1898-1900)

[birdie-told-me]

The man the myth the legend

[birdie-told-me]

[birdie-told-me]

btw roleplaying various characters with your friends is the singular most healing thing in the world. playing with toys for adults

[birdie-told-me]

"he would not fucking say that" but it's "they would not be having carefully negotiated bdsm manual sex"

[birdie-told-me]

bro i was homoerotically cleaning and patching up my friend’s wounds and you ruined it. i was scolding him for being an idiot in an exasperated but fond tone of voice while i tenderly bandaged his knuckles and we both tried unsuccessfully to avoid looking into each other’s eyes until the tension between us became unbearable when you entered the room without knocking and fucking killed the mood. what the hell, man.

[birdie-told-me]

Give me a look - I'm captivated by you.

Give me your hand - I was melting with a wafer

In your inflamed larynx...

_______________________

//l would like to introduce my OCs too ✨//

[birdie-told-me]

I love when ancient poets talk about how doomed & hubristic seafaring is. like yess lets surpass our natural limitations and travel to unknown places. let's test the boundaries between life and death with our human ambition. let's shipwreck ourselves and bring nothing but grief and tragedy to human history with our overstep. this is so sexy

[birdie-told-me]

Making every other fantasy race except for humans a monoculture isn't just lazy, but actively robbing yourself of a wealth of story depth. Give them cultures with distinct nuances about things a human would have no idea about. Elves whose invisible and extremely nuanced cultural cues are not only incredibly subtle, but vary from one elven line to another, so something that would be considered a remarkably tactful and delicate choice in one elven house would be an atrocious insult in another.

Goblin clan feuds about The Sacred Bug - they all agree that this specific species of beetle is sacred to the Goblin Gods, but the question is whether it is taboo to eat it, or whether it would be blasphemy to not eat this bug that was specifically gifted to goblinkind by the gods. Can You Eat The Bug -wars are torrid affairs that can last generations. There's a theory that there are two different goblin gods who appear as the same one, and have deliberately given their own respective clans contradictory instructions about the bug just to fuck with them. Everyone who has ever asked a goblin about this theory has been bit.

Dwarves who have different regional measures for different ground depths. There's a confusion within a construction crew digging a new tunnel with some of the foreign builders using words like "first cracks deep" for something that's not a measure that's in use in the dwarvish universal metric system. And then it turns out that different dwarves from different areas are used to different kinds of bedrock that cracks at different levels, and they also disagree with each other about how deep is "first cracks deep".

And the Mason Master of the projct throws his pickaxe in the tunnel wall in frustration and goes "alright the next one of you to say some utter fucking hillbilly bullshit gets their ass beat so bad that your mother's beard falls off."

[birdie-told-me]

[birdie-told-me]

do you have a character who wears plate armor... are you making sure to take advantage of the opportunities, necessity even, for human intimacy that come with how deeply impractical and difficult it is to equip without help. who's dressing your warriors??🎤🫵