bisexualnerd

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super secret special mission!!

(want a chance to get a comic or illustration by me? I'm doing prizes for a charity raffle for @fandomsforpali, more info here!!)

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cat summer begins the literal millisecond they see one (1) spot of sun

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Anyone who's ever done anything creative needs to fucking see this.

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i am not good at drawing kiddos but here's my best rendition of Dino Kid Obi-Wan Kenobi 🦖🦕

I'm imagining Qui-Gon opening his door in the middle of the night to see lil Obi crying cuz he had a nightmare that featured the asteroid that killed the dinosaurs

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an important distinction 🐦 more chapter art for door, opening.

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Never getting over how differently howl's moving castle book and movie treat the scarecrow

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insert cassandra by abba lyrics idk

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time to see if my old mpreg player works ahhh!!!

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Hood: “How was I supposed to know that 8-year-old girl wasn’t the Riddler?! It was dark! THEY HAVE THE SAME BUILD.”

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*At the Watchtower for some huge meeting*

Superman: hey Red Robin! Happy belated birthday! It was last week right? How old are you now?

Red Robin: 17.

Nightwing: 20!

Everyone: *stares*

Nightwing: RR, we talked about this. You can’t just decide to stop aging. That’s not how it works. You were born 20 years ago so you are 20 years old.

Red Robin: no. I’m 17 and I really need you to stop saying I’m not.

Impulse: Yeah! We’re 17 Nightwing! We’re never gonna be older than that!

*yj core four gather round Red Robin menacingly*

Superman: what?????

Nightwing: *sighs*

Batman: *dissatisfied grunt*

Red Robin: we went through a lot of bs to become eternally 17 and I won’t let you ruin our hard work!

Wonder Woman (eternally young and suffering for it): why? Why would you do this?

Superboy: if RR is doing it we’re gonna be right there with him!

Wonder girl: *nods*

Red Robin: believe us, you don’t want to see what happens if I lose my youthful optimism.

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Jason: *walks into living room and pauses, looking at tim* uh Tim: *frowns as he looks up from a book* what? Jason: um. Tim: dude. Spit it out. Jason: *still staring* you like that book? Tim: yeah I’m really loving it! It’s a new bestseller, Steph recommended it. It’s a fun fantasy. ‘S got dragons and the romance is nice and Jane Austen-esque. You should read it, it’s right up your alley. Jason: uh. Okay. I’ll, uh, look into it. And, uh, what about the author? Know anything about them? Tim: *frowns* aside from the fact that there’s like, no information about them, no Jason: *chuckles nervously* ah, yeah. Haha.

Jason, later to his editor: hey can we change my pseudonym? I wanna use “Todd Peter” and see how long it takes for my brother to yell at me editor: Jason that’s not how pseudonyms work

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Bruce showing his kids affection, aka, gift-giving

Tim, who finally got a spleen transplant after Bruce had begged him a million times, returning home from the hospital: Hey Bruce

Bruce, extending papers towards him: Welcome back. These are for you, sign here

Tim: Aren't these are Wayne Enterprises papers

Bruce: Yeah it's your company now :)

Tim: What do mean it's my Company now?!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

16-year-old Dick, returning home after winning his mathlete championship: What're the papers for, Bruce?

Bruce: It's your new mansion's paperwork

Dick: What?

Bruce: On your new private island :)

Dick: WHAT?!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jason, running into Bruce on patrol: Sup

Bruce, with a man in tow: Thank god I ran into you, Jason

Jason, eyeing the guy beside Bruce: Who's that?

Bruce: You couldn't get to family dinner last time because your bike was broken so

Jason: So you got me a guy?

Bruce: He's the new pilot for your new helicopter :)

Jason: My fucking WHAT

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cass, day after she defeated Bruce in training for the first time: Bruce, where's my suit?

Bruce: Oh I gave it away to charity.

Cass: What? Why?

Bruce: I'm getting you a new suit made with triple weave Kevlar and titanium dipped resin lined with memory foam

Cass: Expensive?

Bruce: Just $1,058,600 :)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Damian, in his initial days as Robin, who hadn't killed anyone in an entire month: Good morning, Father, what are you doing?

Bruce, choosing a colour scheme for the new zoo he's about to make for Damian: It's a surprise:)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Duke, listening to music: Man i wish someone would buy me Spotify premium so I can listen without all these ads

Bruce, handing him the deeds of Spotify the next day: :)

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bok bok bok bok baaawk 🐔

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Very public and an obviously not fake Batman is Bruce Wayne reveal

But Bruce simple acts like this never happened

_

Reporter: MR. WAYNE, MR. WAYNE, WHY HAVE YOU BEEN HIDING THE FACT YOU ARE A FOUNDING JUSTICE LEAGUE MEMBER?

Bruce, head tilt, eyes squinted: .. What is a “justice league”

-

Reporter: Mr. Wayne, prince and knight of Gotham-

Bruce: why would I be “night” of Gotham? I would be 3:24 pm at most

-

Gothamite: thank you for the save Batman… or Mr. Wayne… do I call you Batman in the suit and Mr. Wayne when you get coffee on Wednesdays?

Batman: *turning around slowly* what the fuck is a Mr. Wayne?

-

Villain: ah, Batman, or should I say BRUCE WAYNE-

Batman: *puffing up* WHO is this ‘Wayne’ and why is he impersonating me

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Tim: Oh, Damian's tried to kill me lots of times.

Tim: There was one time when we were younger, he disguised himself as a case file, because he knows I love case files.

Tim: So I went to pick it up to work on it and he took off the disguise and went 'MBLEGH it's me!' and stabbed me.

Damian: *smiles fondly at the memory*

Dick: Damian, no stabbing your brothers.

Jason: There's a more important issue here. How the fuck was he disguised as a case file -