bishiglomper

[bishiglomper]

So half a dozen years go they said i had soft tissue swelling in one foot. Didn't even notice it until the next year. They said I had a permanantly swollen foot just from diabetes.

Was outside. Just ate. Bpm was 140ish. One foot looked like it's veins were just dark and purple. But the swollen foot from the knee down looked vaguely purple hue.

No one could confirm if it looked like it fell under the term 'pooling' but they did agree it didnt 'look right'

What am I supposed to do with this

Do i have pots or not

[bishiglomper]

I woke up too hot. Both mom and I abandoned he bed and were on separate pieces of couch.

Once I got up to turn up the ac I realized both ends of the vent had disconnected. So it was regurgitating hot hair. Good thing it doesn't run on gas.

So I was already hot and that made me cranky having to deal with it.

Foud out our freezer door had popped open AGAIN and our new meat was completely defrosted. And my cache of coffee cubes and bag of coconut milk cubes had totally melted. Along with 3/4 of whatever were in the trays.

I informed mother of all the things the best I could without sounding like I was mad at her. I announced I was hot and tired and cranky. She agreed.

I ended up crying then. Which fucking sucks because when I cry I'm fucked and weepy for the rest of the day. I even tried to get in a other nap before I had to people.

But niece is throwing baby a birthday party. So far it's our families minus brother in law and 3 strange men. Thankfully no one's spoke to me. Just because I'm deaf and emotionally sludgey. If they wanted to introduce themselves or a anything i would try to be receptive but no one does that anymore pffft

I am so tired.

And to add insult to injury my IBS reared it's ugly head and I had to dig I to mom's go-bag of supplies...

I still feel weepy. I just wanna go back to bed.

[bishiglomper]

I made it through dnd without more anti-anxiety drugs

Had the same PDA anxiety over getting to my appointment today tho...

I also promised to watch baby long enough for sister to bake cakes.

Thankfully I was able to quell any anxiety over dealing with the usual chores I needed to get done today. They took 5 minutes and wasn't on a schedule.

I didn't feel good during the limbo between chores and babysitting. So I took more lorazapam and tried to doze.

Rn I'm just sleepy

I wanna go to bed when I'm released

Mom may expect to watch our shows but tomorrow is the baby's birthday party and I'm gonna cry if I start thinking about what they expect from me tomorrow

I'm just so tired

I need more coma time

[bishiglomper]

So far there's only 3 players.

I'm still so anxiouuuuus

I made one guy taste the cookies. He's diabetic too and also went to school for baking lol

He said it was good but. Texture was... yeah. He also thinks it's like skimming off a layer of cake pffft

I want more people here so there's less I have to do. I'm just here to go "YAY FRIENDS" and cast firebolt. Don't make me make decisions 😭

[bishiglomper]

I was too anxious to live so I decided to play with baking.

I attempted diabetic friendly cookies

I used stevia/allulose/Splenda mixes for the white and brown sugar. And almond flour. Which is where I assume it messed up lol I did throw in a few dashes of cake flour in the hopes it would give it substance.

It did not.

I melted half a dark chocolate bar and used semi sweet chocolate chips. So they're like double dark chocolate chip cookies.

They're actually delicious.

But they have absolutely no substance.

It's like if you skimmed off a thin layer off the top of a cake 😂

But yeah they taste like super soft, thin chewy chocolate chip cookies

But they're so thin they disintegrate just looking at them 🙃

So good though 👌

[bishiglomper]

[bishiglomper]

Help dnd is in 2.5 hours and the PDA is setting in

Why did they have to take my craft club. That made the transition so much better. I was already there at the shop and happy from quiet friend and craft time

Now I'm just WAITING

To LEAVE the house

And then ROLEPLAY

With like 6 people

Uuuuuuugh

I don't like it its making me anxious and sapping my mental spoons.

[bishiglomper]

My earrings went from "Spoonie" vibe to Salad Fingers 🫠

[bishiglomper]

I went to a theme park Tuesday.

Slept all day Wednesday. I lived long enough to get labs and go to lunch wth my niece and them but then I slept all day. Mom had to feed me. Taking meds was a chore.

Was sort of functional Thursday. I went with my sister to like 2 grocery stores. And I made cookies for mom.

And then the people took us to another drive in theater. Where we saw how to train your dragon and the new karate kid movie.

Do you know that activity takes 8 fuckin hours.

We got home at 2am.

On a good day I've been waking up between 7-9. It's 11. I'm still so exhausted.

I don't know what all we're doing. I thought we were doing garage sales

I gotta get my shit together and figure out what I need to set up because my tarot friend is letting me put my stuff out for tomorrow's garage sales. (Town-wide thing)

It's probably becase I'm low on energy but I don't waaaaant tooooo 😩

[bishiglomper]

Lmao

They're not doing A1C because they did it the last time.

[bishiglomper]

So I have labs today

When i got up an hour ago I checked my bloodsugar. It was 140. Jesus christ. That's fairly high. Especially for fasting.

I was gonna try to cheat so I took 4 glipizide and actually took my morning Lantus shot for once.

Also max dose of glipizide is 2. It's the fastest working diabetic med.

Took my bloodsugar again.

145.

Just what the fucking fuck

I walked a lot yesterday too

This is bullshit I wanna lawyer D<

[bishiglomper]

Body;

We're going to have an exertive 15 hour day

Why in God's name are we up 1.5hrs before we have to be

[bishiglomper]

I don't know wtf is wrong with me

It's either low blood sugar or anxiety or something

But I feel overstimulated and CRANKY

I yelled at cinderbelle. I was trying to eat and she was vying for attention and she doesnt -bite- but she grazes her sharp teeth across me when she wants me to pet her. I snapped at her. I think I used my Adult voice.

Mentally I think I'm fine but this has been happening more often... this overstimulated gotta-go gotta-run crankiness. There's definitely some PDA going on but I think most of it is I don't feel good so I don't want to do anything but crawl into a deep quiet hole.

It doesn't really feel like low bloodsugar. It's 3:30 though and I hadn't eaten so it might be a factor? It's only 100. So if that's my low my sugars having been running high. Which is unfortunate. Because I have labs in 2 days. 🙃

I just want this to stop its nearly making me crawl out of my skin 😭

[bishiglomper]

I did a little bit of stuff today. Swept and spot cleaned my floor. Litterbox. Gathered the trash. Did a bunch or coffee for me and my sister. Put my meds up.

Got shit together I need for tomorrow. We're going to an amusement park.

Then I took a heavy bag of stuff over to my sisters. It's like a 5 minute walk. It's cloudy but a little humid and about 80.

I felt fairly blah by the time I got there. We only stayed and sat for about an hour while we watched her blow up his cool kiddy pool set. It wasn't particularly too warm or anything

It's depressing me and making me dread tomorrow. I was doing pretty good today. But just a liiiiiittle walk in a liiiittle humidity has me dragging 😩 It just doesn't fucking bode well

Also I want to sit here in the cool air of our new little AC. But Cinnabit is begging for attention. But she's being persistent and overstimulating me. I just want to decompress....

Mom is also sounding like she's gonna throw her across the room if she tries her again. Mom is trying to find Information on the park and see if we can get an electric cart.... 😣

[bishiglomper]

I always loved the underground in Diamond and Pearl

I like the new additions

I only collected 40 diglet once and got 3 shiny boxes. I got like 2 others just because I was lucky. I'm sad you can't put anything else in your hide out though. Just having a room to pile statues in there for effects is boring.

But the contests. And berries. And poffins

God I fucking hate it. I do not have the mental spoons to deal with all that bs. And EV training arrrrgh I'm so spoiled by Legends of Arceus

I think I'll just do the main storyline and throw all my favorite pokes in Home and be done with it...

I wonder how many Haunter/Gengar I have named Nightlock at this point

I gotta have one on every game 😂 Love my ghosties ♥

[bishiglomper]

My sister made pork stir fry

It's delicious but I'm so confused.

She asked for soy sauce and rice vinegar. That's normal.

I asked what was in it. Teriyaki and honey bbq.

It does taste like bbq but how does her sauce taste like mesquite??

I mean it's delicious but it's very undeniabley mesquite

Honey bbq doesn't taste like mesquite

[bishiglomper]

So I'm really close to finishing Legends of Arceus but I wanted Darkrai. But that involved having a Brilliant Diamond or Shining Pearl save file. I don't own that one, sooo...

I sent out a request on FB asking if I could borrow one.

Craft friend's daughter leant me Diamond 😁 I mean, I just need a save file but she didn't say when she wanted it back so of course I started playing it.

I don't know what the requirements were but I got handed a Jirachi and Mew in Floaroma town. Nice!

Also the second I got an old rod I got myself a magikarp and have been leveling it.

I get to the bridge full of fishermen trainers and that one fisherman with like 6 magikarp

Had my magikarp take all of them on, it was level 19.

It evolved right after that battle. I just thought that was perfect. 😁

I'm gonna have to look up and see what other mythical pokemon I might be able to get. 👀

I never got much chance to get the event pokemon for one reason or another. I once got Mew during Ruby and Saphire. But that was because we were in Iowa and the nearest toys r was only an hour away... 😂

I'm definitely gonna have to pay for the stupid Nintendo thing so I can access Home.

I was gonna wait until October or whenever Z-A comes out so I can subscribe then.

I only like the random trading. Gimme all your breeding rejects 🤣

I swear he only thing motivating me to finish the main line on Arceus was finally getting the other two starters.

Arceus is the easiest freaking time I've ever had catching mythical pokemon. All pokemon games should be that easy istfg. It's much more interesting too. I hope Z-A uses the same mechanics