blogroll241-blog

[blogroll241-blog]

Getting closer...

Only a week now and the stepson will be darkening my doorstep again.luckily my sister will be visiting and I am also going away for a week so I should be chilled when I return and up for dealing with anything. I am very much looking forward to going to Wales again. Hot tubs and alcohol and reading equals relaxation. Not sure I'm looking forward to the train journey but I'm trying to see it as an adventure. I've been trying out my suitcase and seeing what I can fit in and still carry it up and down stair, not an easy task when the case is about half my size. The stepson and stepdaughter will be a nightmare, both adults, will giggle in corners and no doubt try and treat the house like a hotel and me like a ski you, except it's not happening. And if any sign of money missing occurs he will be finding a new place to sleep. It's happened twice before, this time there are no more chances. On the up side I'm feeling a bit buzzy, I am fairly happy at the moment but my emotions are a bit crazy. I also realised I'm very erratic, even with my driving. I think I'm risk taking. My addictive personality is rearing its head. Christmas was eBay, now it's alcohol and shopping. How do I stop these urges and how do I find someone who understands and can help. I feel like I'm floundering like a fish out of water!

[blogroll241-blog]

Eejit

Feeling shit. I'm emotional over someone I shouldn't be. I don't fancy him but I'm obsessed for now. I know it will run its course but I don't know when that will be and I'm just stressed.

[blogroll241-blog]

:(

Feeling sad. Yesterday was a good day, spent a lot of it messaging with a friend, and today suddenly they have gone all quiet on me. I know it could be they are busy but I just feel like I'm being ignored. I'm not sending lots of messages demanding they speak to me, but I just feel really dismal. :(

[blogroll241-blog]

Fun n frolics

Well yesterday was a lovely sunny day. I met up with someone for coffee who I haven't seen for over 30 yrs. I was amazed at how we got on, I expected it to be awkward but conversation flowed freely; as freely as it can with a 9 yr old sitting with you. Maybe he bought his son along as a chaperone in case I couldn't resist his charms ! :) Today I went to visit a friend for coffee, this is one I regularly meet up with. We get on very well as we are both miserable old gits. We have great conversations about music, DVD and we put the world to rights. Later my o.h and I took the dogs to the country park, making the most of the weather. Haven't heard from the boy today; I'm sure he's fine. His auntie sent him a valentines card- I wonder if he will recognise the handwriting! I've been talking on messenger recently to an old work colleague from about 17 yrs ago and it's really nice. We have chatted quite a bit. I've said on my next visit to a friend who lives that area I will try and pop in and say hi. The idea is a little scary as we have obviously both changed, both have families and we both used to fancy each other! I wonder what it will be like to meet. Oh and I've also been contacted by a person I went to school with. We were never 'friends' but he remembers me well. It's amazing how we all have different memories and perceptions. I was really shy but he thought I was outgoing with lots of friends. I hated school, socially it was torture- another reason I'm convinced I have Aspergers or at least very strong traits.

[blogroll241-blog]

Forgot to mention

You may or may not be aware of the madhouse I live in( I will explain next time) but it seems we are about to get more chaotic and overcrowded. My s.s is moving back here and no doubt will be moving in whilst he sorts out his depression. His bio mum is a total twat and only sees him when it suits her, so we are left to deal with it like we do with my s.d and her bipolar and lazyitis- you should see her room. At the age of 24 she should know better it looks worse than my 13 yr olds. I refuse to clean it. It's bad enough I do her washing and clean the house and get the shopping. All she pays is £50pw inc food n bills yet she never offers to buy a takeaway or babysit or help in any way. If s.s comes I can guarantee there will be changes made. Whoa, chill, I don't want to get upset, I'm nicely chilled and I want to stay that way. Anyway, that's my rant sorted. For now. Til next time Xx

[blogroll241-blog]

What's new pussycat...

Well, it's been a fun couple of weeks. My son has been off school due to illness for over a week so my days have been restricted but I did get to do some craft techniques with a friend for a couple of hours. I have had 3 blasts from the past recently. Two school pals and the third was someone I used to work with many years ago. Truth be told I was in love with him but we went in different directions. We are both in relationships and I have to say having seen his photo I no longer fancy him but I still like him to talk to and flirt with; we have a very easy relationship even after all this time. The other two are odd; one is a guy from school who I don't recall being that friendly with, the other is a guy I treated badly but I didn't know what a cow I was then and I have apologised. On the news a major incident recovery operation is underway on the A12- a lorry came off the bridge onto the dual carriageway. It's very chilly out so I am sat next to the wood burner talking to you and indulging in a particularly smooth and enjoyable glass of wine. Oh and just to throw this into the mix, I went to see the GP about my aching joints etc and he sent me to have my knees x-rayed! Wouldn't increase my pain relief or refer me to the hospital, just wants to wait until the results are back. On the upside my cholesterol which was 6.6 can wait a while to allow me to try and reduce it myself before I go on statins. I seriously need to look them up. I don't want more tablets unless I have to. I suspect I have sciatic arthritis but no one seems to believe me, which is why I want a second opinion, but not getting anywhere. Anyway that's my moan dealt with. Oh and RIP Tara Palmer Tompkinson. I thought you were a rich bitch but nobody deserves a brain tumour x G'night all

[blogroll241-blog]

Independence Day my arse

25 June 2016. The day the majority of voters opted to leave Europe in the referendum. 52:48 in favour. Does Democracy rule? Apparently in Britain now, Democracy only works if it rules in some peoples favour. Because the Stayers have lost they have gone whinging like children to ask for a revote. What they haven't considered is that some on the fence stay voters have seen an overwhelming majority wish to stay and therefore may change their vote in a new referendum; instead of over a million votes difference in the result it could widen considerably more. Then what? More boo hoos and demands for a recount? Either we have Democracy or we don't. People are scared but hey, it's an adventure and we only live once, lets make this a great legacy for our future generations. Britain starting afresh, not being swayed by bully boy tactics but stand firm for what we believe in. No longer being forced to let people in because of the country they come from but on personal merit- criminals and shirkers not welcome. We are a multicultural country and we can continue to be so and to live in harmony accepting each other's differences as long as we are not forced by the EU. Also the benefits of the Eu- these should be neighbourly terms of give and take, not us give give give and the Eu take. We get very little back and all we do is support 27 countries economies at detriment to our own. We need to break free from Europe and learn to make our own decisions and heal our communities before we consider helping out other countries and their problems. Yes, it will take time and I have no doubt we will encounter hardship, but will it be worse than what our generations who fought in Ww1 and WW2 had to face? Unlikely. We may have to go without luxuries and cheap fashions but Europe are not the only traders, we have other choices in who we trade with. As for immigration, well, answer me this. If you were running for your life, would you not stop at the first safe country and be grateful you made it out alive? Why do people NEED to make their way here? And it's always young men. They should be getting their old folk, kids, etc out and then going back to fight for their rights not come here and send handouts home, that is not what refugee status is about. I generally am happy to see people in real need come here but not via several safe countries or having paid money to smugglers, that's not desperation, that's criminal. We as a nation need to heal Britain and not tear it apart any further and all those Stayers who think it's white working class men who voted leave well, guess what,it looks like all the middle class numpties who wear rose tinted glasses and worry about their salaries and au pairs are the ones who want to stay because they live in ivory towers whilst the little people scratch around trying to make a life for them selves, they are the ones who send oxfam £10 a month to ease their social conscience and ignore the homeless guy on the street and report him to the police for vagrancy and making the street look untidy. Get a grip on reality people. We need to make a stand, and we will fight you all the way to do what's right, especially as you are so blind you cannot see the grip Europe has on you and your terrified minds. I pity you and I am ashamed to have you as part of this country. There is basically one question now- Do you believe in Democracy? YES? Then shut the hell up and start making a difference. NO? Well we do so feck off somewhere else and leech on another country whilst we put our country back together. Enough said for now. Peace and love Goodnight.