blorbo-apologist

[blorbo-apologist]

I just realised that Nanny Ogg Is the Samwise to Granny 's Frodo

I'm scrolling through Rhianna Pratchett's bluesky and saw her say Granny Weatherwax could probably bend the One Ring to her will.

Now I can't get out of my head this image of her rolling her eyes at all the self-important men at the Council of Elrond and doing it herself because they would just bungle it, giving Gandalf a stern talking-down-to, being jealously unimpressed with Galadriel's treehouse, sending Shelob running, and generally stomping her way across Middle Earth and into Mordor to chuck a piece of jewelry into a volcano.

She would be complaining the ENTIRE time.

[blorbo-apologist]

[blorbo-apologist]

honestly christianity really hit the jackpot with "jesus christ" rolling off the tongue as an expletive so well. the number one problem with fantasy settings is that whatever names you come up with to take in vain will never hit as well as "jesus christ"

[blorbo-apologist]

howl does like his outfits

[blorbo-apologist]

Sophie was almost awed. "You mean you jilted the Witch of the Waste?"

Howl cut himself another lump of cake, looking sad and honorable. "That is not the way to put it. I admit I thought I was fond of her for a time. She is in some ways a very sad lady, very unloved. Every man in Ingary is scared stiff of her. You ought to know how that feels, Sophie dear."

[blorbo-apologist]

Which Discworld should you read first? Here have this friendly flowchart, start at the Upper left corner, the orange bubble.

[blorbo-apologist]

I’m playing Mightily Oats in a production of Carpe Jugulum and made an official Omnian pamphlet to hand out to people at my production and then the director asked me to email it so he could print copies at his work so i decided to send it in the way Oats would…..

[blorbo-apologist]

as you know, I am playing Mightily Oats in Carpe Jugulum, and

Director: in the background of the naming ceremony, you should hand out pamphlets-

Me: CAN I MAKE MY OWN PAMPHLETS PLEASE

Director:…..yes…..

[blorbo-apologist]

character whose whole philosophy is "if i don't do everything i can, what use am i? what use am i anyway?"

[blorbo-apologist]

Mightily Oats Headcanons [mega long]

Probably no one gives a shit about these but Mightily Oats is very dear to my heart as I played him in a production of Carpe Jugulum this year, and I’ve started a new routine with parts where I write long and detailed backstories for myself so that I have something in the back of my mind and the character doesn’t just begin at the beginning of the play so anyway, since theres a surprising amount of material on him anyway, here’s my compleat history of Mightily Oats.

Keep reading

[blorbo-apologist]

ive been laughing at this for about 20 minutes because

pew pew

[blorbo-apologist]

she let me hit it because...ghhhh....she let me- *pants* ughhh my head.... Why can't I remember?? Graaah [cursed pussy begins to throb]

[blorbo-apologist]

No but you do a Vetinari and get the thieves to police the thieves, get assassins to police the assassins etc etc

crime frankenstein, without a doubt. next question

[blorbo-apologist]

Macbeth but the witches didn't read the script so they adlib. Also one of them doesn't really understand what a play is, even though she's playing one of the main characters.

Describing Terry Pratchett’s books is difficult. Someone asked me what the book I was reading was about, and I had to tell them it was about banking and the gold standard, but like in a cool way with golems and action. 

 I don’t think they believed me.

[blorbo-apologist]

Don't forget the hooligans are Scottish Smurfs! When someone asks me what I'm reading I tell them about the bemused teenage witch/midwife/cheesemaker/travel nurse (whatever seems more absurd at the moment) and her Scottish Smurfs and toad lawyer

Describing Terry Pratchett’s books is difficult. Someone asked me what the book I was reading was about, and I had to tell them it was about banking and the gold standard, but like in a cool way with golems and action. 

 I don’t think they believed me.

[blorbo-apologist]

im having feelings about the uffington white horse again

[blorbo-apologist]

you guys are so annoying. why do i have to see discourse every year that's like "was tolkien really a woke king or was he your conservative uncle?" the guy was a devout catholic and a genteel misogynist who maintained lifelong friendships with queer people and women, and this isn't even paradoxical because that was part of the upper-class oxford culture he was immersed in. tolkien told the nazis to fuck off (and in doing so demonstrated a real understanding of what racism is and why it's harmful, beyond simply "these guys are bad news because they're who my country is at war with right now") but his inner life was marked by internalized racism that is deeply and inextricably woven into the art that he made. he foolishly described himself as an anarcho-monarchist, and it's kind of crazy to see people on this website passionately arguing that he likely never meaningfully engaged with anarchist theory, because...yeah, no shit, of course he didn't. tolkien didn't have to engage with most sociopolitical theory because as an upper-class englishman of his position, he was never affected by any of the issues that this theory is concerned with. what is plainly obvious from reading both his fiction and letters is that tolkien's ideal political system was that the divinely ordained god-king would rise up and rule in perfect justice and humility; he didn't want a government, he wanted a king arthur, even though (obviously) he was aware that outcome was impossible. why is it so hard for people to accept that he was just some guy! his letters aren't a code you have to crack. no amount of arguing or tumblr-level analysis is going to one day reveal a rhetorically airtight internally consistent worldview spanning jrrt's fiction, academic work, and personal writings, thereby "solving" the question of whether he was a woke king or your conservative uncle. his ideology was extremely inconsistent because, at the end of the day, he was just some guy.