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Boba Fett bored out of his mind on Panna Prime waiting for his quarry/mark.

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It’s a good thing he comes packaged with armor already; Jango’s line of work is dangerous for children.

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Something I think is neat and kind of funny is that Boba and Jango AND Din all demonstrate complete willingness to find the loopholes in their contracts and promises even if they won’t directly break their word. Like, Boba doing that thing where he gets his friend to pay him some pocket change in exchange for murder so that it’s technically in his contract. Din promising he wasn’t going to let that guy he hated “die by my hand” and then letting him get eaten by dogs. 

And I actually rly like the conception of Mandalorians as people who understand that they are in some ways limited and weakened (at least in that career path lol) by their cultural dedication to following a strict Code of Honor. So to compensate for this they tend to be really good at negotiating their way into loopholes and technicalities via legalese and vaguely worded verbal agreements. 

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still not over the fact that teenage boba fett tried to hide his identity on concord dawn by taking on the alias jaster mereel

this kid really did the mandalorian equivalent of showing up at the border like, "hello fellow americans, i am also an american, which you can tell by my very normal american name, john f. kennedy"

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i need to see her as a knight

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boba fett in the bounty hunter wars series: i am normal. i am SO normal. i am the most normal human in the galaxy. in fact, i had all the non-normal parts of myself (see: anger, fear, joy) surgically removed via lobotomy. you can trust me. i'm normal.

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Saw one of those posts where someone was like “Boba Fett was only 37 in Return of the Jedi?? He shoulda been at the clubbb” and like. I cannot stress enough how much he was at the club. He was chilling in the corner but he was AT the club. Max Rebo was there and everything

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okay, so i've mentioned before how boba isn't above using wordplay/intentionally ambiguous wording/verbal loopholes to get out of rules or agreements he doesn't like while maintaining a front of ~*being true to his word*~. i believe the phrase i used was, "like some fucked up fae creature."

HOWEVER, after a review of additional expanded universe materials, i have come to the delighted realization that he has truly been doing this shit non-stop since he was a child. it's literally like,

"dad says i'm supposed to feed these feeder mice to this eel while he's gone, but TECHNICALLY, the words he used were, 'we'll be back when these are gone,' which doesn't necessarily mean dead. ALSO he's said that "patterns are traps," and killing a mouse each day would be a pattern, so if i let some of them go instead, then TECHNICALLY, i'm just following his advice :)" and "dad said i need to be in this apartment when he gets back, which TECHNICALLY means he said i could sneak out as long as i'm fast enough to get back before he does :)"

which leads to

"jabba said he wants me to destroy every last member of this smuggling ring despite the fact that the majority of them are enslaved children but i only promised to 'deal with' them, so if i kill their master and send them away, i've still technically destroyed the entire gang and 'dealt with' the members :)"

which leads to

"the hutts are only paying me to kill this dude and deliver them a grisly video of his death, but they didn't say i couldn't do a bunch of extra stuff like torch his merchandise afterwards, just that i wouldn't be paid for it :)"

which leads to

"it would technically be a breach of code for me to kill these guys unrelated to an active bounty, even though i really want to and it would be necessary to save the life of a third party, but oh would you look at that, said third party happened to find three credits in his pocket, and as long as i verbally agree to said fee, this is now an ongoing bounty, and i can kill with impunity :D"

which leads to

"based on your promise, i hereby verbally agree to backstab my entire galaxy and help deliver it to the yuuzhan vong for purging and enslavement (but since i know your promise is a lie, my promise "based on" it is also a lie and i'm actually going to secretly go behind your back and do the opposite :)"

basically, if you're gonna hire boba fett for something specific, you better have outlined at MINIMUM a 12-page document outlining exactly what he can and cannot do, or he WILL just fuck off and do whatever the hell he wants

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while we’re on the topic of boba’s mandalorian-ness, i would just like to inform y’all that in the expanded universe, a huge part of boba reconnecting with his mandalorian identity as an adult is him getting found-family’d by a canon-gay-married mandalorian couple (goran beviin and medrit vasuur)  and it’s exactly as glorious as it sounds. highlights include:

boba gets invited to one of their family dinners and spends the whole time disassociating bc he’s never been to a large family gathering before and everyone is SO LOUD and their adopted kids are staring at him and he knows he’s coming off as a surly asshole and he can’t stop

when beviin and medrit find out boba is going to meet a jedi, medrit smiths him a new set of beskar, including a new piece to protect his neck, and beviin tags along to hover protectively around boba and shit-talk the jedi. 

you know, like a true friend 

early on, boba hears beviin is struggling financially and, while trying very hard to look preoccupied with weapons maintenance, casually offers to maybe send some bounty hunting work his way… not that he was interested in it himself… honestly he’s too busy rn… so this isn’t him being nice or anything–

beviin sees through this immediately and is touched by his friend’s concern for him

the second boba realizes beviin is touched by his concern for him, he HANGS UP ON THE POOR MAN MID-SENTENCE 

“haha yes i’ve done a friendship thing and i’ve done it so subtly and stealthily that no one will ever kn– oh god he knows too much ABORT ABORT”

boba does eventually chill lol

beviin has a habit of affectionately referring to boba by the diminutive form of his name

forming the diminutive of someone’s name in mando’a is done by simply adding the suffix “‘ika”

bob’ika

boba experiences a gradual adjustment of “dude wtf” to “hmm this is fine actually” to “this is Our Thing and if anybody besides beviin ever tries to refer to me as that, i will beat them to death with their own arms”

beviin is also the only person allowed to make sarlacc jokes around him

“Why do you bail me out all the time, Goran? And don’t say it’s because it’s duty to the Mand'alor.“ “Because nobody can live the way you do and not notice how much it hurts.”

(THIS KILLS THE ME)

anyway, disney is too cowardly to include canon gay characters of any significance so i doubt we’ll ever see beviin or medrit in new canon. but they were there and they were some of boba fett’s most significant mandalorian connections in the expanded universe and more people should know about them.

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weird things about the sarlacc and boba fett’s time therein, according to the expanded universe

i was talking about this in a mandalorian groupchat and felt it deserved to be shared on tumblr, so without further ado, here’s a bunch of fucked up shit that happens in the sarlacc according to star wars legends:

first weird thing about the sarlacc in the great pit of carkoon: it’s…. questionably sentient? basically, sarlaccs absorb bits and pieces of their victims until they achieve a kind of weird melded consciousness. and, perhaps due to the fact that it had absorbed jedi in the past, the carkoon sarlacc was like, prolific in this regard,  to the point where it had a fairly well developed personality and identity that it basically ripped from its first victim, a young boy named susejo.

as “susejo,” the sarlacc would not only physically digest its victims alive, but psychologically torture them. this was discovered by an anthropologist who studied the video captured by boba’s helmet while he was in the sarlacc, which showed him reacting to stimulus that wasn’t there. it caused said anthropologist to speculate that the sarlacc not only fed on its victims physical bodies but also their fear and pain.

in fact, in “a barve like that,” a story written by moran under a pseudonym, we get entire conversations between boba and “susejo,” in which this man gets LITERALLY GASLIGHTED BY THE FUCKING SARLACC

susejo/the sarlacc basically tries to convince boba that none of this is really happening and that it’s all in his head.

it is entirely unsuccessful in this regard

that said, it also tortures boba by making him live through the dying memories of its other victims, so. that’s fun.

after pilfering through his mind for awhile, susejo/the sarlacc tells boba: “It’s been a long time since I had one like you, all bright and sharp around the edges. You are nearly a work of art, Fett; there is a clarity to you that is quite wonderful. A purity to your intent.”

(i read this description of boba fett more than a decade ago and it has lived rent-free in my head ever since.)

(also the sarlacc does this while hanging boba from a wall in a mockery of what he had done with han in jabba’s palace, which isn’t super relevant but is just cool thematically)

but not to worry! boba eventually escapes in very spectacular fashion

y’see, boba’s jetpack has an emergency panel that can activate the jetpack when switched. problem is, he can’t reach it with his hands bc the sarlacc has his arms pinned to the wall. 

but one day, boba reaches his breaking point. susejo/the sarlacc is gearing up for another round of psychologically torturing its victims via memory share and boba just fucking snaps. 

“You’re an ingrate, you pathetic excuse for a sentient being. You got taken down here as a child and everything that you know and everything that you are you owe to the people you let get eaten” - - and the Sarlacc’s tentacles spasmed around Fett, digging into him, hauling him back into the wall behind him–“and your feelings are hurt because I’ve told you so? You could have helped that Jedi, she’d have come back for you. Instead you spent the next four thousand years playing at philosophy, abusing the people who taught you to be what you are, never even dreaming that you had options, and why?” he screamed at Susejo, building up to it, blasting him with the rage and hatred he had spent a lifetime growing, the Sarlacc’s straining tentacles shaking against his body. “Because you’re stupid, a miserable mean wretch of an excuse for a sentient being without the imagination or the courage–” The tentacles slashed around him, a sound like a thousand whips cracking, drowning out Fett’s voice.

you may have noticed that, throughout the course of this excerpt, the sarlacc presses boba progressively harder against the wall–which just so happens to provide the pressure necessary to switch that emergency panel i mentioned earlier.

trapped between boba and the wall of the sarlacc, the jetpack explodes, badly wounding the sarlacc and throwing boba to the ground, arms free.

“Standing in the fire, burning alive, Boba Fett fired a concussion grenade into the ceiling thirty centimeters above his head, and threw himself down to the surface of the tunnel, into the flaming mixture of acid and fuel-The explosion tore apart the world. The concussion slammed Fett down into the flames, and his left arm, trapped beneath him at the wrong angle, snapped as he was smashed down atop it. A pain so great it was like a white light surrounded Boba Fett, and he knew that he was dying, that he had failed, like all the others before him, that he had traded a slow death by acid for a fast death by fire–Sand rained down upon him. A long time later, Boba Fett became aware that he was still alive.”

upon regaining consciousness, boba throws even more grenades, blasting a hole in the sarlacc until he’s able to claw his way out.

basically, it’s a good thing that boba fett does not regularly open up about all the rage and hatred inside of him on either a verbal or psychic level bc it’s apparently enough to overpower a fucking sarlacc.

even decades after escaping, boba remains haunted by not just his own memories of the sarlacc, but the memories of its other victims and their lives, forever mingled inextricably with his own. bc shitty traumatic memories are definitely something boba fett needed more of.

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braids

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underrated relationship in legacy of the force is between boba and hayca mekket, the grouchy doctor/veterinarian who administers his cancer treatment. they have one scene together and they spend the entire time verbally roasting each other in a squabble that culminates in her threatening to stab him in the dick with a large-bore needle

and then next book, we learn that he thinks she's hilarious and is actively looking forward to seeing her again LOL

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I’m reading Star Wars: Boba Fett: Maze of Deception ( A clone Wars novel), the 3rd a out young Boba and the most unrealistic thing is that none of the clones recognize him at all.

Like I have to believe that they looked at home and went “ not my problem” or just figured he had a chance to be free.

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กูไฮป์ไม่หยุดเลย😭😭😭😭😭😭

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#poor boba having the diaspora experience

I showed this post and tag to my brother and he said "Diaspora? Who's that?"

Legacy of the Force: Sacrifice