bodiesoflight

[bodiesoflight]

US artist Christina Bothwell creates sculptures focusing on mythology, lucid dreams and the concept of the soul

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DID sucks because in the morning you think "maybe I'm actually normal and I should stop overanalyzing my experiences and just enjoy life" and in the evening you get possessed by the ghost of yourself from 2018

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DID, OSDD, and amnesia can present so many ways. it's different for everyone.

amnesia may present for one as forgetting things that happened in childhood, while having great memory for recent events. it may also be remembering everything that happened in childhood while having terrible memory for recent events.

amnesia doesn't have to be complete loss of memory, either. a lot of people do have that kind of amnesia, but sometimes amnesia is being able to recall a memory but it being so blurry and indistinguishable it's pretty much like it actually is gone, or something like remembering pieces of what you just did while you can't actually find the visual memory in your head, as if someone just told you what you did but left out major parts of the story.

it might also present as emotional amnesia, where you are unable to recall the feelings you felt at the time of the event, while you otherwise can remember what happened.

you don't even have to forget that you've forgotten. while a lot of these are more common in DID and OSDD, none of them are necessary other than the fact you have amnesia of some kind, and in some people with OSDD, none at all.

you don't have to have every single type of amnesia, you can have multiple or all types of amnesia, you can also have only one. any amnesia counts.

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"Whats your favorite memory?" questions are such bullshit I literally don't remember that shit it just occasionally comes to me in divine flashes and leaves indefinitely

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𓆩♡𓆪

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are you ever like. i’m not the right Me right now to hang out with people. wait until the better guy shows up lol this one kind of sucks 

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Being an evil doppelganger has to be so fucked up like imagine meeting a better version of yourself. Some chain of events going differently that led to "you" being a better person in a way you can never achieve. Personally I'd have no other option but to try and kill them

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Walt Whitman, from "Song of Myself" in Leaves of Grass

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shout out to alters who dont have a physical appearance

shout out to alters who dont have a name

shout out to alters who dont have much to differentiate them from others

shout out to fragments

shout out to alters without a role

shout out to alters who’s only identity IS their role

shout out to alters who feel like they just exist

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A revolutionary way of healing I discovered through maturation and specialized therapy is allowing your system is live in and exist in an environment you wish you had as a child.

Don’t restrict them, neglect, or ignore them. Don’t become impatient or angry. This will guarantee chaos.

Allow them to express themselves, listen to their voice and opinions, and don’t silence or hush them. If you disagree with an alter’s intentions or actions, instead of isolating or punishing them, become closer to them, there’s a reason they’re acting the way they are. Hear their cries and let them know you’re there, that you have their back, and they aren’t alone. Sometimes the loneliest, angriest person just needs support. Sometimes they need guidance. Sometimes they need a new perspective.

Foster an environment that encourages honesty and collaboration. By listening and responding to their needs you will inspire them to keep talking, continue seeking growth, and reach out. Over time this will help you not only understand and love your system but it’ll also help you learn to enforce and respect boundaries, explore confidence, and self-esteem issues in daily life many chronic trauma survivors struggle with.

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I was thinking about blackout amnesia and switching the other day, and about how, for us, it’s not like “I close my eyes while laying on the couch, and I open my eyes and I’m in bed”, but more like “I suddenly realize that I’m in bed but I don’t remember ever having gotten out of the couch.” And it can be a delayed realization.

Just as an alter switching in can realize belatedly that they’re fronting. Instead of immediately being like “oh, I switched in, I’m *blank*, I’m fronting now”, an alter may have fronted for a while, and randomly go, “oh wait, I’m *blank*! How long have I been fronting?”

I don’t know how common that is, but I figured I’d mention it.

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alters who don’t front often or never front are completely valid and are still real alters

we still perform duties for the system, it’s only from the inside instead of the outside. and even if you don’t perform a “duty” that you deem important you’re still serving one. even if it’s something hyperspecific or strange. even if you don’t know what that duty is.

hosts and protectors and other alters that front often get most of the spotlight, so let’s all remember to be thankful for our system managers, the internal self helpers, and other alters who perform duties almost completely internally as well. :-)

-moth

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"why is your memory so bad?" ""Why are you always so out of it" "your like a completely different person!" See I have an explanation for this but I don't think your gonna like the explanation

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Weird/subtle amnesia things with DID that I didn't think I experienced because of amnesia

Not remembering that you don't remember. In fact, generally people who experience memory problems, but do NOT have DID, are typically aware of the fact that they have memory problems. People with DID generally remain unaware (not always, but oftentimes) and oftentimes afraid and defensive when their amnesia becomes evident. Be careful when pointing out memory problems to someone with DID (questioning or diagnosed) because of this.

Hazy/foggy/blurry memories. You look back at the past week and can barely remember. Having many hazy/blurry/foggy memories in general of your life.

Not remembering huge portions of your life history, especially in early childhood.

Losing knowledge and skills you know you had before. This doesn't just have to be things like cooking, cleaning, or driving, but things like drawing or other hobbies and interests, too.

Remembering only the facts of a situation, but not how you felt.

Remember vague details and being able to put together a vague summary of events, but not really truly "remembering" it. For example, you might know that you were very angry because you know you punched your wall, but you don't remember why you were angry and you don't "really" remember what happened, just that you were angry and punched the wall because of the evidence and vague memory of what happened, but you're unable to explain any of what happened or how you felt further.

Feeling like something happened a long time ago even though it happened recently, and vice-versa (feeling like something that happened a long time ago was recent). Especially if something happened just this morning, but it feels like it happened a long time ago.

(Feel free to add on!)

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About to pull my famous move where I disappear for 6 months

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Memories of August by 90377 Instagram | Etsy Shop