boggyswamp
boggyswamp
bog
148 posts
little bug they♈︎
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boggyswamp · 5 days ago
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I know that some British people take umbrage at Americans calling the Great British Bake Off relaxing, but it's just because GBBO is such a different kind of stressful from American baking shows.
American baking shows will be called something like "Cupcake Knife Fight", there's horror movie lighting everywhere and dramatic stings every 5 seconds. All of the contestants are shit talking each other and fist fighting over the one single deep fryer provided by production. It will show the judges all whispering to each other at their super villain table overlooking the whole kitchen, and one will be like, "Oh my god. Everyone look at Brenda right now. She's straight tanking it." And it will cut to Brenda, who is running around covered in flour and crying and also bleeding for some reason. Then you get a clip from an interview with one of the contestants, and they're like, "I really need to win this. Without this award money, I'm gonna need to close my restaurant, sell my dad, and live out of my car. AGAIN." Then the giant digital doomsday clock overhead lets out a horrid klaxon, the judges tell half of them that their cupcakes taste disgusting, and one of them gets eliminated and sent to walk down the dramatically-lit shame hallway never to be seen again.
Meanwhile GBBO is in a lovely, brightly colored tent, there are delightful and friendly hosts/jesters there to keep everyone entertained, and all of the B Roll is of like... a bumblebee going into a flower, or a lamb running in a field. And yes, there will be moments where someone will mess up their timing or something, and they'll be looking at their bake through the oven door like, "oh gosh I don't think this will rise in time!" Then they stand up to find Paul Hollywood directly behind them ominously. His creepy whitewalker eyes will glow white, and he'll say something like "the 12th of June. 2035. Drowning." And his eyes will go back to normal and he'll walk away. Then the baker gives a playful grimace to the camera and says "that didnt sound great, did it?". Cut to a sweet looking older woman sipping tea on a stool and she says "oo I do hope that Prue enjoys the taste of my sugary, sticky baps!". Then, at the end, someone gets a gold star for doing good, and the loser of the episode gets in the middle of a giant group hug. You see all of them at the end of the series at a giant carnival with their families and the post credits informs you that all of the contestants have become a Partridge Family-style traveling band and stayed friends forever.
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boggyswamp · 5 days ago
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just remember, tense your shoulders, grit your teeth, take rapid shallow breaths and say to yourself ”oh shit, oh fuck, this is all my fault”
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boggyswamp · 17 days ago
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boggyswamp · 17 days ago
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Having experienced a lot of it in my 20s, I think some of the worst, pettiest, most straight up this-is-just-bullying-you're-passing-off-as-praxis incidences of Queer Infighting endemic to young people can be best understood as attempts to exercise power by people with very little power.
Like you're 22, you're queer, you've just become a Marxist, the scope of World Suck is overwhelming and you have $30 in your bank account. What can you do to feel like you have any power? Well, you can try to get your frenemy cancelled for cosplaying a character from a problematic show. You can write a public callout post over someone's obviously friendly use of a slur you don't think they technically have the right to reclaim. Doing this stuff can make you feel like you have power and your actions have an impact. Unfortunately the impact in question is a negative impact on other marginalized people. But that often takes some maturity and self-reflection to notice.
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boggyswamp · 17 days ago
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boggyswamp · 17 days ago
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in the 2000s everything was happening on the dance floor. they signed the magna carta out there
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boggyswamp · 19 days ago
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Bro leave me ALONE
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boggyswamp · 19 days ago
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"What were you doing at the devils sacrament" jarking my whole thing off. Next quiestuon.
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boggyswamp · 19 days ago
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Sorry for the inactivity. I've been working on some bigger illustrations and sometimes I just forget to post. Also I recently bought a new tablet so I've been catching up on some WIPs since my last tablet died.
I've been really interested in rural fantasy lately. I've lived in the Midwest and southern Appalachia all my life so I find this to be a way to connect life experience with the escapism of magical worlds. Expect more to come and enjoy this illustration of Cerberus with a southern twist.
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boggyswamp · 19 days ago
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YOU HAVE ENTERED
RADICAL SATURDAY
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boggyswamp · 19 days ago
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There’s always something on Reddit
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boggyswamp · 19 days ago
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boggyswamp · 19 days ago
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boggyswamp · 19 days ago
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This pic is literally what unmedicated adhd feels like if someone ever asks you why you haven’t completed a simple task in 7 months just send them this
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boggyswamp · 19 days ago
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Who made this edit, it's the most valid one
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boggyswamp · 23 days ago
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we are much alike
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boggyswamp · 23 days ago
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reblog to give your headache to elon musk instead
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