bonecavibora

[bonecavibora]

6/25/2025 5:27 am

i haven't been to work fr in like 2 days i logged on yesterday and ended up just closing my laptop. i'm tired and floating, i don't even know what im thinking about my brain is just a thick fog :/ it's 5 am and i have to work today. i slept for like 10 hours in the middle of the day yesterday and im still tired but i can't sleep now. i never know what to do when i reach this point and i reach it so often, all i know how to do is act like everything is fine until i can find some kind of way out. i feel so drained i feel so numb like i don't know how to describe the way i feel i just feel like i'm not here. a pit in my stomach, a pit in my chest, i can't stop having flashbacks and my anxiety is at an all time high but i be feeling like i don't care what's gonna happen anymore. i feel like i watch my own actions from behind a glass and i can't control anything

[bonecavibora]

im chasing a version of myself that i’ll never get back but i can’t stop

[bonecavibora]

6/23/25 10:02 pm

feeling pretty down idk... laying next to my boyfriend i wanna talk but he's asleep, that's ok he has to work at 2. i miss him and by the time he comes home i'll be at work :') but anyway here's some good newzzz we're moving out! we're supposed to move in with each other at like the beginning of august and i'm soooo excited. i'm excited for us to share a house, a real one not this apartment that i hate lol :D i lost my contract at work and bombed an interview today but it's okay things get better... or at least that's what i'll tell myself to stay afloat

[bonecavibora]

3/17 4:18 pm

laying next to my boyfriend, i wish he'd wake up. i be so bored when he's asleep like come on at least turn around or something u_u anyway, what an interesting weekend... can't wait for my body to go back to normal

[bonecavibora]

3/13/25 10:18 pm

that nigga was the devil i actually have to delete that post LMFAO but anyway i have a boyfriend, a real one. i love my boyfriend idk if he loves me though :| i cried at his house yesterday like a weirdo i just don't like to talk about my feelings </5 but i appreciate him for being there. i wish him the best in life i hope he don't think i don't like him fr or something i love being with him. i hope we have lots of fun and go places this summer he makes me feel like i can do anything

[bonecavibora]

6/28/23 5:35 pm

heyyy :P feeling very content i been drawing today and just generally relaxing.. a lot of the shit for my room came today so i'm excited about that lol but i'm about to do my friend hair, THAT SHIT TAKES FOREVER. i think i'm gonna wear my hair out to work tmr hopefully i don't change my mind idk lol but anyway i just spent lots of money >~< i'll make it back fukkit

[bonecavibora]

5/14/23 7:03 am

i have a crush guys 😋 watch me bag dat

[bonecavibora]

4/12/23 3:24 am

today wasn't that great honestly i feel so empty.. went to my friend's house and painted last night then i slept until 5 pm what a waste of a day fr. i think i'll do some cleaning today idk what to do with myself honestly and contrary to popular belief i miss noonie lol. i watched what's eating gilbert grape and it made me sad.

[bonecavibora]

2/20/23 2:12 am

ok yea fuck dat other nigga we moved on :3 and i hope dis mf never see my tumblr bc that's weird and i don't need him reading about himself -_- im not here to stroke egos

i met dis other boy and we talked about music and astrology like what nigga you know dat know his chart? not just da big 3 but da big SIX like whaaaaaat?

anyway, i feel hella unproductive but i just applied for a new job so let's see what happens :3 i think i should gts right? i have nothing else to do..

[bonecavibora]

2/15/23 7:57 pm

i literally want to die so bad i need to smoke or something. i feel terrible. i'm in my virtual driving class rn and this nigga reads so slow it's irritating me. i don't even know what to do to make myself feel better it seems so much easier for everybody else. i wrote out a routine list but idk if i'll follow it while i'm feeling like this. i need antidepressants or something idk. also a puta me mandou uma mensagem... ele disse q vinha mas eu n queria ve-lo mas meio queria... n sei

[bonecavibora]

2/9/23 9:39 pm

heyyy :3 every once in a while it dawns on me that i have literally no friends... like i love paris 2 deth but she live 2000 miles away like wtf

i have nobody to kick it wit on a daily basis u_u but anyway today was cool. i just got my permit back and i signed up for driving school n shit.. im ready to be out this mfn crib ngl

i think the whole "i have no friends" thing comes from not having a man LOL me and noonie were literally besties... i do miss noonie but we cannot be together ts just would not work... plus i'd still feel the same way bc dat nigga is a master disappearer tf

anyway i'll be back later :/

[bonecavibora]

2/9/23 6:07 am

just got off the phone im finna gts. but before i do that, lemme tell you how fucking weird dis nigga is bra. like if you don't wanna talk to me just lmk?? i refuse to he strung along by a bitch ass nigga bra like either you fw a nigga or you don't just keep it a fuckn buck???? my feelings not gon be hurt lil bra i promise yo dumb ass... and i talked to my ex today? he always saying he want me back but i'm too smart to be doing dumb ass shit like that. it's not like i don't love him but when you consistently doing the same shit i said i didn't like, why would i wanna do that shit again? use your noggin bigdawg that shit is for da birds..

[bonecavibora]

2/9/23

hey y'all i installed my wig. it's growing on me or whateva but i don't do straight hair. im bouta order some food and call it a night... today was cool... im otp and i can't type and talk so ima get back on here later

[bonecavibora]

2/8/23 3:34 pm

i woke up at 8 this morning coughing up a fucking lung but i frfr woke up at like 1. excited because i'm installing this 32 inch straight joint todayyy :3 i'll update y'all on that.

currently working on this commission... i feel like it's gon be hard but it's 5 people in it bra like gahhlee wtf :') but i made $55 off it.. a win is a win

i think im bouta buy a ski today idk i'm so tired of not having enough accessories

[bonecavibora]

2/8/23 5:40 am

i can hear my family waking up lol i just hope nobody tries to talk to me right now. i'm not trying to be a dick but from 2 am to around 6 am is my alone time. something about those hours brings me peace. i feel like i never really have the time to sit and reflect on my day outside of these hours.

i don't know how i'm gonna manage working overnight :( it won't make a difference in my sleep schedule since i'm always up, i'm just gonna miss being able to sit up and think at the crack of dawn. i love when it's dark outside. i'd love to walk around at those hours but as much as i don't like to admit it or think about it i'm a girl and realistically, that's not safe to do alone.

anyway, let's reflect on the day and shit. i woke up around noon because my mom was calling me. i was blown bc she didn't respond and im not gon lie bra i was NOT getting up. but she called me again and my grandma came over! i haven't seen my grandma in a while she moved like 30 mins away and i don't drive :') but yea after she left i finagled some doordash for my mom and shit you know... but anyway yea i kinda don't remember what i did for the 4 hours following that. that is so concerning.

i hate how so many hours of the day just disappear from my head. i like to reflect and that's pretty hard when you don't remember what the fuck you was doing. but yea after those 4 mystery hours kev called me to come smoke and i made a lil deal wit daniel. nigga took me to my auntie house for a cinnamon bun LMFAOOO.

i been smoking a lot more ever since i came back from college. i don't really see it as a problem but i feel like the smell of weed is in so many of my clothes and wigs... the smell of weed doesnt bother me but why would i wanna walk around smelling like the drug i partake in? i like to get high tho lol it allows me to sleep like 75% of the time and it clears my head... i'm also wayyy nicer after i smoke. that's that boneca shit lmfaooo.

speaking of that dumb ass boneca shit, lemme tell y'all about this weirdo ass nigga. on my soul dat nigga act soooo lame to me bra. i don't know what it is... why do niggas do that disappearing shit on me every time? niggas be so fake busy bra but it's 24 hours in a day and all i want is a "hey how are you" maybe even a "good morning" but if i'm not that important to you i shouldn't be fuckin wit you right?

i think at this point i should stay to myself forever? but i don't know i want at least one valentine's day to be successful. but niggas is just so super duper fucking weird bra like if you don't wanna fw me fr just say that shit. if you just want sex say that. if you don't feel like talking just say that. i don't even ask for a lot fr, i ask for the bare minimum if we're being honest i could be asking for the world and then some. i know niggas don't always got it like that to be trickin, but when did i ever ask for that? and especially if you a nigga who claim dat he havin bra. if you was truly havin, you would come see me by now!!! i don't even want your money bra just put some gas in that dumb ass car and bring yourself.

anyway, i should sleep now right? i'll prolly talk to y'all in the morning... i'll tell y'all if that puto text me.

boa noite pra casa de boneca