boringsundays

[boringsundays]

I’ve followed you for like 10 years now?? Anyway I started following you on Instagram and I’m so proud of you for wearing short sleeves/sleeveless stuff! I remember it used to be such a source of stress for you, and I feel like you’re my little sister and I’m so happy for you! You look happy and gorgeous :)

Awww this is so sweet thank you! It’s been a long journey and I still cover up in some settings but overall I am so much more comfortable. My boyfriend has helped me to be even more accepting of myself and doesn’t give my scars a second thought when I wear short sleeves 😭 it helps alleviate my self-consciousness so much

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Hey Sam, I used to follow you on tumblr when you were fleshscars. I loved everything about your blog back then and it's crazy how much time has passed (I think it's been like 10 years???) I was so happy when I found your new url again like it felt like seeing an old friend even though we never interacted. I just wanted to say I'm so glad to see you're doing well and I'm so proud of you and where you are in life and doing this whole adulting thing and I wish you really all the best in the world

Luv u angel sorry I responded to this like 6 months late

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Did you ever decide if you’re going to go back to school?

Prob not! Too expensive and I am poor lol

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update on my fruit erasers collection

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Alexa Demie Leopard Limo photographed by Coughs

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watching succession is wild bc both “i just wonder if the sad i’d be without you is less than the sad i get from being with you” and “don’t hear much about syphilis these days. very much the myspace of STDs” are said by the same fucking man

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Hiiii

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Still check this space every now and again. Dunno if you do too but just wanted to check in and see if you're okay? Hope you're doing well and feeling v v content with life right now (: and if not, hope you know that all things pass and better days are surely ahead (but sincerely, I hope you're doing quite well)

Hi! Sorry I never check on here anymore but thank you everyone who sends me such nice messages every once in a while 😭

Feel free to follow me on Insta @smnthaprk

I’m very happy, living with my bf and love my job :) thank you so much for the well wishes - I hope all of you are well

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Just deleted Instagram, Twitter, and Snapchat. Feels good.

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Tips on how to stop self harming?

Therapy if you can.

If not, write or talk to a trusted loved one when you have a bad day. Even if it’s something stupid like you tripped at work and are embarrassed and that sent you into a spiral.

Mentally unwell brains are sensitive and that’s okay. We don’t need to be in crisis mode to check in with ourselves or cry or reach out to someone. This is the biggest thing I’ve learned.

Some days I have days where I feel overwhelmed and I cry a lot for no big reason at all. Before I would’ve directed that anger at myself because I wanted to target it at something. I wanted to release it somehow.

Now, I let myself cry but I do not let myself spiral. I cry for a little bit/let myself be said, then start saying, “Okay - what are some thoughts I’m having right now that are NOT rational or helpful?

For example, right now I’m feeling that I’m unloveable and worthless. I know that’s not true because I have family and a boyfriend who love me very much.

I’m also feeling like a failure. Like I’ll never get anywhere. I know that’s not true because I felt this same way a few years ago and have survived. That’s a success in itself. I have gotten a job/made new friends/made my rescue cats have happy lives.”

I strongly encourage you to say these things out loud or write them down. Sad brains can derail very quickly and easily and it’s no wonder it’s hard for us to get back on track to rein them in. But it’s an exercise just like running or weight lifting. The more we do it, the stronger we get. ❤️

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Advice on how to love yourself? I can’t stop comparing myself to other people. Feels like I’ll never be able to fully love the way I look

Surround yourself with people who you know love you unconditionally. Talk to them often. Also spend times doing things that make you proud of yourself. Even if those things are just making your bed or doing the dishes. Do things that make you feel how tangible your worth is to this world.

Another thing I do specifically when I’m feeling physically insecure is to get naked in front of the mirror and just look at myself until I feel neutral. To even say out loud “this is me and that’s okay. If I was gone tomorrow, would the people who love me care about the way I look or that I was happy? That I was a good friend/sister/daughter? The way I made them feel?”

Write a lot about how you’re feeling. Streams of consciousness in a journal or even just in a word document. Get all that negative brain gunk OUT when you feel it building. Dont let it reach maximum capacity and burst when you try on a pair of jeans.

Your body’s job is to to be as healthy as it can be in containing YOU - your dreams, your thoughts, your interests. Its job is NOT to look like anyone else’s nor be a certain size/shape/color. ❤️ The more I’ve repeated these affirmations to myself when I’m feeling ugly or worthless, the more easily I am able to bounce back into a healthy brain space. It takes time and patience and gentle-ness with yourself.

I don’t know what you look like and I don’t need to in order to know you deserve peace, happiness, and liberation from those negative thoughts. ❤️

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did u delete ur finsta??

I just never use it anymore tbh :( but am considering using it again maybe hmmm

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life update plsss. i miss you on tumblr but know it's for the best that you're not here anymore hahah. wish you the best!!

Hi!!! I’m doing really well. Living in a new apartment as of November with my boyfriend. Been struggling a little bit mentally with the pandemic and feeling isolated/unfulfilled due to low mental stimulation/not being able to see friends and family but other than that very good!

Just got back on meds for ADHD which I think is going to help me IMMENSELY. I’ve been struggling a lot with not being able to focus on work or even on things I want to do for fun, so I’m feeling very grateful to have medication again

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what's your instagram?

@parksamantha :)