br-o-ken-poetry - Tumblr blog

[br-o-ken-poetry]

I’ve decided that, instead of a big showy goodbye, I’m going to quietly slip away, and edit this post (from a relapse moment in March) rather than posting again and causing a fuss. If anyone comes looking for me ever, know that I am alive and well, doing so much better than when I posted this originally. I am still writing and I’m trying to put good energy into the world. I made this blog as a deeply troubled teenager and now I am an adult. I have matured a lot and any views expressed here over the years may not reflect who I am now. If anyone finds this and figures out who I am, keep this in mind. I’ve had my share of mental health struggles and this was my safe space. I have shared some dark thoughts here, even during relapse phases as an adult, sometimes in a way I now would consider socially irresponsible. I ask you to forgive me for that. But I’ve not been active here in some time and this will be my final post. If I slip up again, I will handle it privately and responsibly. I think knowing this is the right thing to do shows I have truly grown up enough to finally close this book for good. I am sorry for the sadness that’s been shared here. Not sorry for the life-long friends I’ve met or hard lessons learned. I won’t share my name or say where you can find me, as I am truly moving on from this space. But don’t worry: maybe fate will mean you meet my writing elsewhere somehow. Deleting this blog would be pointless, as re-blogs will always stay, so I’m just writing this to close officially. The blog will remain up, but I will not be back. I’ll be living my life. Keep writing, read poetry, and be happy. I hope you all are able to leave the sad times behind. Wish me luck x

Original Sad-Post:

I hate my life I hate how heavy and sad I feel all the time I just want it to stop and I've said this so many times before but nothing ever changes I'm so sick of it like where is the happy ending

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when margaret atwood said “the desire to be loved is the last illusion. give it up and you will be free”

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i hope you heal from the things no one ever apologized for

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I look at others and I feel so sad for myself. I’m just existing. And they are living. They are able to move on and get ahead in life but all I do is stay stuck in the past and suffer

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how much of it was real?

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“I wish that I could leave myself alone. I wish that I could finally feel that I punished myself enough.”

— Carrie Fisher, The Princess Diarist