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solid proof of xielian's real starbucks order

[brainrotta]

One Incense Diabolical Gibberish Applesauce

Pei Ming, Feng Xin and Xie Lian were doing some heaven official’s stuff in the human realm. They found themselves in possession of a peculiar potion called One Incense Diabolical Gibberish Applesauce that supposedly, when consumed, makes anyone speak absolute nonsense and unbelievable lies every time they open their mouth.

It was important that they test it right away so they played rock-paper-scissors, Feng Xin ended up losing so he gulped the potion down his throat.

Pei Ming rubbed his hands together and couldn’t contain his curiosity. “So, General, care to share your thoughts?”

“I love Mu Qing,'' Feng Xin blurted out, without missing a beat. Xie Lian’s eyes widened in shock, his mouth contorted, he had to stop himself from bursting out by covering them with both hands.

Pei Ming sensed entertainment on the horizon and chuckled “Ha, ha, ha, very nice. Tell us more, what do you love about him?”

Feng Xin seemed to be in some sort of trans, showing no sign of self awareness of his own words, but speaking with passion. “We've been through so much together; he's my closest friend. Our paths always lead in the same direction. And for so long I misunderstood his actions and intentions. Back then, I was unbelievably dense. He’s hard working, loyal and really really smart. He protected me despite my constant accusations and distrust."

Just as Pei Ming sighed in disappointment and Xie Lian sighed in relief, Feng Xin dropped another bombshell “So I finally realized that I love him and I want to spend my days with him”

Xie Lian's eyes widened once more, Pei Ming laughed, “he, he, he, I’m so very happy for you. Please, continue” he prompted. Xie Lian frowned but was curious at what he’s gonna say.

Feng Xin was speaking with the air of utmost sincerity, “He's an amazing person; I can't help but admire him. He is an extraordinary martial god, with such a wide set of skills. And not just that, he is both strong and gentle, at the same time. He is proficient at strategic planning, and has refined taste and impeccable sense of style. He has excellent skills with sword and saber, yet he’s also good at needlework and fine craftsmanship. He is also the most captivating man I’ve ever seen and his voice is like a melodic symphony”

Xie Lian stared in astonishment, Pei Ming held himself around his waist, stopping his laughter “You're absolutely right, General. He truly is like that. I can see it now. But, does he know how you feel about him?”

Feng Xin replied unbothered, “I hope so, since we’ve been together for some time now,” Xie Lian lightly face-palmed himself.

“Hi, hi, hi ” Pei Ming was beyond amused, and Xie Lian felt bad for Feng Xin. They should probably stop interrogating him like that. Letting him embarrass himself any further would be too cruel. Pei Ming will, undoubtedly, make fun of him for a long time. But while he was hesitant on what to do, Pei Ming inquired further “been together, as in…?”

Nonblinking Feng Xin’s words, “As in, he sleeps in my bed. Or I in his. We are lovers. First thing I do after waking up is kissing him, and the last thing I do before going to sleep is kissing him.” His eyes were blinking like little stars and his features softened in grace.

As he spoke, an image flashed in Xie Lian’s mind, but he quickly dismissed it, scolding himself for such thoughts. An image appeared in Pei Ming’s mind as well, and he was eager to hear how things were going to unfold.

Feng Xin continued,“ I steal his kisses during the day, wanting to touch him every time he’s standing close, and every night we wildly make lo??” He was abruptly cut short by Xie Lian who knocked him out unconscious, nonviolently, pressing his acupuncture points.

“General Pei, don’t you think we’re having too much fun at Feng Xin’s expense?. We’ve tested the potion. It seems to work as expected” Xie Lian was nervously explaining himself.

“That’s alright, Your Highness, I heard enough, ho ho ho” Pei Ming inwardly concluded how this mission paid off nicely. Xie Lian was sensing something off about this whole episode, but couldn’t tell what exactly.

[a couple months latter, at Hualian’s ]

Hua Cheng is entering a room with a bottle in his hands, frowning in confusion, and finds Xie Lian writing something at the table. He asks skeptically “Gege, what did you say this potion does?”

Xie Lian lifts his head and recognizes the bottle. “Oh, it’s the absolute nonsense potion, it makes one speak only unbelievable lies.”

Hua Cheng scratches his head, “Erm, I think Gege may have mixed up the bottles, this seems to be a potent truth potion.”

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Mu Qing is number one

Mu Qing had recently discovered that some of his devout followers in the mortal realm were planning to stage a play in his honor. As their beloved god, he felt compelled to ensure that the production was tasteful and met the highest standards. Thus, he decided to attend the first rehearsal in disguise, making sure there were no malicious rumors about him and that everything proceeded as expected.

He was thinking of inviting Feng Xin to come with him… just casually, no big deal, if he wants, whatever. They’ve been sneaking around these past couple of days, around the heavenly capital, and this could maybe be their first date. Or not, it’s just a stupid play, no one cares. But he never did.

Feng Xin knew about it already, because, for some reason, he became extraordinarily good at noticing and remembering every little thing about Mu Qing. At the same time, he became equally inept at performing the same mental tasks concerning anything else.

He secretly hoped for an invitation, but even if it didn't come, he had no intention of sulking; his plan was to surprise Mu Qing with an unplanned date.

Like some bad luck, as the event drew near, Xie Lian unexpectedly called Mu Qing, seeking his assistance at Puqi Shrine, at the exact same time as that play rehearsal. Nothing of importance, he concluded. Xie Lian was going on and on about some maple leaves, autumn harvest, cooking dinner and so on. Mu Qing politely excused himself, explaining he has important business to attend to that cannot be postponed and suggested Feng Xin is probably available and willing to help. Wait, nooo. Why did he say that? He wasn’t sure.

Now, at least, he can feel rejected. Feng Xin will for sure run to help His Highness. He would never choose him as a first priority, not that he was competing for such status.

He knew Feng Xin couldn’t possibly know that he was choosing. Mu Qing never asked for anything; never put himself out there, exposing to the possibility of rejection. And additionally, he did everything in his control to end up going alone. Nevertheless, he still felt like the rain was pouring down on him, like he was being wronged.

But oh well, he’s used to it. On his own. He just likes it like that.

The time had come eventually and he was just about to leap down alone, when Nan Feng caught him by the wrist and pulled him back into his arms. “Gotcha” he smiled at him.

“You were really gonna go alone?” he inquired, sounding a bit angry.

“Well, how else? Let go of me, what is wrong with you?” Fu Yao struggled out of his embrace while saying a bunch of stuff he absolutely didn't really mean.

Nan Feng softened his tone a bit “I thought we could maybe go together? Like, just the two of us,” looking at him with puppy-like eyes.

“Aren’t you supposed to be at Puqi Shrine?” Fu Yao snapped harshly, still not sure why.

Nan Feng scrutinized him for a moment, his brows furrowed, thinking this crazy, miserable youth was being too pitiful.

“His Highness did call, indeed. But I have a person I care about a lot, someone I wanna spend more time with. And he is my number one now.” He approached and planted a soft, lingering kiss on the side of Fu Yao's temple. "I wanted to go with you."

Fu Yao, curling into himself with a smile, pondered the fact that he is somebody’s number one, Feng Xin’s number one. He hugged him tightly and teased, “Is that what you told him?”

“I told him, I need to kick your ass” Nan Feng smirked too obnoxiously, Fu Yao rolled his eyes over the top.

As they were snuggling and bantering, focused solely on each other, Nan Feng stumbled, and they both fell right through a portal, landing embraced, legs intertwined, on top of the stage where some play was just about to begin.

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Hua Cheng comes to visit

FengQing are smooching at the back of the Xuan Zhen Palace, where no one would see them. Feng Xin has Mu Qing embraced in his arms, up against the wall; one hand holding his waist and the other gently caressing one side of his head. Mu Qing has both his hands tightly wrapped around his neck. Loud noises could be heard, but what do they care?

When a wild Hua Cheng spawns right behind them, none of them two notices. But he had enough to see. Not that he cared about FengQing though. He casually advised, “Don’t squeeze too hard. Are you trying to crush him?” and disappeared. But only after they both turned around and looked at him with terror in their eyes. He wanted to see that.

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Feng Xin’s contemplation

Mu Qing seemed sound asleep in Feng Xins arms as he woke up and laid his eyes on him. It was after their first night together. Still drowsy from sleep, for a second, he forgot what had happened the night before and was shocked at the sight of Mu Qing curled up next to him. His body unconsciously jerked, and Mu Qing started to move slightly. Feng Xin began to panic inside, freezing in his movement. Fortunately, Mu Qing didn't wake up and just adjusted himself closer to Feng Xin. Feng Xin sighed and relaxed.

Gradually, the memories of last night started to come back to him, in fragments. It wasn’t all very clear. He remembered them having a fight; he even saw a bruise on Mu Qing’s shoulder that hadn't faded yet. He felt bruises in his own body as well. He tried to piece together a chronological sequence of events in his mind, but the feeling of kissing Mu Qing’s lips constantly interrupted his inner narrative. Mu Qing’s soft skin now pressed against his own, and his silk black hair, loose and tangled, kept arousing feelings inside him that distracted him from thinking straight.

He succumbed to this feeling for a moment and began to gaze gently at Mu Qing sleeping, realizing, kind of for the first time, though also as if he had always known, how beautiful Mu Qing truly was. That face he had wanted to strike so often now appeared fragile, clinging to him, trusting him,exposed and vulnerable in his sleep. He wanted to kiss it again. He longed to kiss every inch of his face and his bruised shoulder, astonished at how he could ever have wanted to hurt it. 

And then astonished at his own feelings. But Feng Xin was always honest and true to himself. He remembered kissing him suddenly in the midst of the fight, and how Mu Qing hadn't really fought back and had surrendered helplessly. He recalled his hot face blushing red when he lifted his lips, his eyes bloodshot, moist and bewildered. He thought of his heart pounding intensely in his chest as he kissed him again, and how this time they never separated.

Both of them removed their masks and tossed them away, exposing their most vulnerable feelings to each other. Both of them wavering on the verge of tears, completely happy and free. Overwhelmed with those feelings, he couldn’t couldn't resist planting a gentle kiss on Mu Qing's cheek.

In truth, Mu Qing wasn't asleep; he felt ripples of warmth spreading in waves from the point of touch all over his body, causing him to shudder and blush. Feng Xin realized he’s awake. Mu Qing buried his face in Feng Xins strong chest, as if hiding from him. Hiding from him by pressing more closely to him. Feng Xin embraced him with both arms to let him know that everything is alright, that he doesn’t have to be afraid. Mu Qing placed a couple of tender kisses on his chest and collarbone, and they remained in that position, silently embracing each other, for a little while.