brianaluvschris

[brianaluvschris]

I’M TIRED OF SMUT, I WANT TOOTH ACHING FLUFF AND HEART SHATTERING ANGST.

[brianaluvschris]

oh stop it 🤤

[brianaluvschris]

my experience with rose

i feel like it's finally my turn to say something. i've kept this to myself for so long but seeing people still love rose, and now that she's finally gone i can't stay quiet anymore.

i was 15. the whole time i was so confused. she would constantly talk sexual with me, telling me about her fantasies and making comments i didn't even understand yet. she asked me to call with her, and on those calls she'd always bring up sexual stuff. i didn't know what to say. i just remember feeling weird, uncomfortable like i had to just sit there and go along with it even though i didn't want to.

eventually i blocked her. she blocked me back, and then i deactivated. since then tumblr hasn't felt safe for me. every time i see her name or people saying how much they love her it brings all of it back.

i think this is the last time i'll ever be on here. i don't even know why i'm writing this except that i just want to finally be heard. i've carried this for so long in silence and maybe it doesn't even matter anymore but it matters to me.

the worst part is i barely have any screenshots because i deactivated my account back then. that makes me scared no one will believe me. it scares me that most of this only exists in my memory and maybe only i will ever know what truly happened.

sometimes i feel like maybe i'm being dramatic. like maybe i overreacted or made it bigger than it was. but then i remember how sick it made me feel, how confused i was how i didn't even know what to say when she would start talking sexual with me. i was 15. that shoulve been enough for her to know it was wrong

i don't know. maybe i'll regret posting this maybe people won't believe me, but at least i finally said it out loud.

please i beg, interact with this any way i really want to feel heard it feels like im being dramatic but then I remember how much it still bothers me.

tags for awareness@cvnntagious @darksturnz @y3sterdaysproblem @passionfruitchris @nickssidewitch @humpster35

[brianaluvschris]

manifesting you’re right 🙏🏼🙏🏼

NICK WEARING EYELINER??!?

HEAR ME OUT….. they collabed with johnnie….. STFU.

[brianaluvschris]

NO NO YOU DONT UNDERSTAND I NEED TO RIDE HIS NOSE

[brianaluvschris]

CHRIS AND HIS FUCKING HAT LIKE JUST SHOW US THAT PRETTY HAIRCUT ALREADY 😞

[brianaluvschris]

The fact that I’m not riding him rn is making me wanna scream

[brianaluvschris]

new fav pic because i am root beers number 1 fan

[brianaluvschris]

TAKE THAT DAMN HAT OFFFFFFFF

[brianaluvschris]

I love my patient man

[brianaluvschris]

need that fresh love chain dangling in my face

[brianaluvschris]

my literal favs

[brianaluvschris]

happy birthday to literally my favourite people ever

my angels

[brianaluvschris]

hi

hellooooooooo

[brianaluvschris]

And that side hat of his is gonna do it for me everyyyyyy time

[brianaluvschris]

Why can’t he be my best friend, the gossip sessions while eating food would be everything

[brianaluvschris]

Madi has a bf!! 🥰🥰🥰

wait whatt ??? source: trust me bro