briarplant

[briarplant]

once i dreamt that i was watching a documentary film in high school english class called ‘the best pig at watching’. it opened on a pig staring motionlessly at something offscreen. a narrator said ‘this is the best pig at watching’. it then was struck by lightning and the narrator said 'the best pig at watching has died. i now take you to the second best pig at watching’. the documentary went tn another pig that was afloat on like an ice floe in an ocean, staring at something offscreen. then the ice floe sank and the narrator said 'oh dear. we now take you to the third best pig at watching’ and it just continued like that with various pigs in dangerous situations staring off-camera until they died, to which the narrator reacted with mild disappointment and taking the camera to the next pig. this just kept happening until i woke up

[briarplant]

[briarplant]

it's getting too warm outside. I may need to intervene

[briarplant]

Did a brand new kind of bowling shot today

we called it the "trust the Force Luke" shot or the "through God all things are possible" shot

[briarplant]

still thinking about that r/hypotheticalsituation post where someone was like "what if a potato chip spawned somewhere randomly in the world. and every hour the number of potato chips at that location would double. and the only way to get rid of them for good would be to eat all of the potato chips before they doubled again." and someone calculated that it would only take like, 48 hours of people ignoring a weird pile of potato chips before an absolutely irreconcilable number of potato chips was blanketing a city.

and then people were like "no wait if it spawns randomly in the world, it's highly likely it would be in an ocean" and then people were debating whether there were enough small fish swimming at the surface in the open ocean that would be able to eat a potato chip and thus save humanity from the potato chip apocalypse.

[briarplant]

what they don't tell you about hadestown is that orpheus and eurydice are not the main characters. neither are persephone and hades. or hermes. or the fates. the main character is whoever in the band is playing the trombone because holy fuck

[briarplant]

nona the ninth

[briarplant]

goes to sleep in a complex and nuanced way

[briarplant]

goes to sleep in a complex and nuanced way

[briarplant]

goes to sleep in a complex and nuanced way

[briarplant]

goes to sleep in a complex and nuanced way

[briarplant]

immortality as theft (you have to steal life from something else) immortality as parasitism (there is something else inside You that is keeping you alive and you become less of yourself more and more the longer it stays in you) immortality as violence (everything is trying to kill you because everything is supposed to die and the universe will always try to find a way to right the wrong that is You) you understand

[briarplant]

seriously though I have linux mint and it's way faster and less glitchy than windows and the only somewhat difficult part has been installing software but otherwise it's easy to use. and it's free!!

tried and failed to install linux on my computer today 😔

[briarplant]

recently found out about the Chinese mountain cat. did you guys know about this

[briarplant]

what are yall doing that we need this??

[briarplant]

everyone with a computer should install linux immediately.

tried and failed to install linux on my computer today 😔

[briarplant]

nevermind!!! it's working now

tried and failed to install linux on my computer today 😔