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The question

A/N: Hi!! This is my first drabble posted here. English isn’t my first language so please excuse any spelling or grammatical errors (and please let me know if I have any!). Please like and share if you enjoyed reading it. If you have a request, let me know and I will be happy to write it (no smut tho). Happy reading!

Summary: You and Jisung have been dating for about 9 months now. You really want to move in with him, but you don’t know how to ask him.

Pairing: Han Jisung x Reader

Warnings: Curse words, other than that, none.

Word Count: 600+

You just got home from Jisung’s apartment and you sat in your sofa watching tv, while thinking about how much you hated being away from him. You want to be with him 24/7. You feel empty when you go to bed without him, when you sit in your sofa watching tv without him, when you’re cooking food without him. All kinds of things you do, without him. You wanted to move in with him. You two had been dating for about 9 months, so you didn’t really think it’s too early to ask if he wants to move in with you.. only thing is if he wants to.

When you were about to fall asleep, you came up with the best idea how to ask him if he wants to move in with you. You’ve been thinking all night about how to ask him in a fun, romantic but small way. But now you finally got it. You got up from your bed to go get your notepad so you could write it down before you fall asleep. You were gonna make dinner at your place, invite him over obviously, and then hide a key to your apartment under his plate so when you take the plate to wash it, he’s going to find the key and wonder why it was there, and then you’re just gonna pop the question casually. Great plan.

You ware just done with cooking dinner. You and Jisung sat down and began to eat and casually chat. He talked about a video of a dog he saw on twitter and that he would like for you two to have a dog together someday. You just agreed simply. At one point he just stopped eating and put down his chopsticks. You looked at him confused and after a few seconds of silence he spoke out,

“Y/N.. would you like to move in with me?”

You ware speechless. Damnit! You were supposed to ask him that!

As you were a bit taken aback by the question you just looked at him with your eyes big and mouth hanging open in utter silence.  Jisung was the first to speak after a minute of silence.

“I’ve been thinking about this for a while, but I didn’t know how to ask you.” He took a deep breath and spoke again, his voice now even softer than before. “I really love you, and I want to spend as much time as possible with you. I don’t like us living in two places. I want us to share everything together. Maybe even a dog someday, but what about an apartment first?”

You were still shocked, but finally said frustrated while groaning,

“Aishh Jisung! What the fuck!” 

He was now even more confused than you were at first. “What?”

“Look under your plate.” You said.

“Why?” He looked at you, still confused, tilting his head at you.

“Just look under your plate.” You answered him while pointing at his plate.

Jisung looked under his plate, and there it was, the key to your apartment. He looked up at you, still confused.

“I was planning to ask you the same thing tonight. It’s a key to my apartment. It doesn’t mean we have to move in to my apartment, it was just a fun way of showing I want to move in with you.”

His lips grew into a precious smile, and his eyes glistening with love and happiness.

“So.. it’s a yes?”

“Yes, of course.” Your smile was as big as his. You both got up from your chairs and got into a hug, before you sat down again, he kissed you, looked deep into your eyes and said,

“I love you so damn much.”

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pls read!!

hi and welcome to my blog!! ❣️

I make youtube videos (altough only one is posted but I have a few waiting) and would be forever grateful if you could check it out or even share it. It’s one of those “skz moments I think about a lot” videos. I’ll link it down below.

My tumblr kinda looks like trash at the moment, but I’m going to fix it in the next few days. It’s only because I just created it.

Here I’ll answer asks, share random skz things, accept video requests and in the future even write fanfictions.

Thank you for taking the time to read this and hope you enjoy my video! ❣️

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shit shit SHIT

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persona. who the hell am i?

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[LYRICS ANALYSIS] BTS - MAP OF THE SOUL : PERSONA 'Persona'

“’Who am I’ The question I had my whole life” 

So here Namjoon questions his being. It’s something that he always said. It’s not the first time he brought light to it. But some people might think he already found himself with the glory and fame he accumulated. He is here making us all recall that such a question needs an answer from within. Money, success, fame and so on cannot define someone. It just gives them a Persona. 

“The question to which I will not find an answer my whole life” 

He tried and tried to find an answer but he keeps on changing and the world keeps defining him. He is expressing how hard it is here for him to find an answer in such circumstances. 

“If I were answerable with a few mere words. Then God wouldn’t have created those various beauties” 

Beauties here can mean so many things and to understand it we need to define it first ‘It’s the quality present in a thing or person that gives intense pleasure or deep satisfaction to the mind, whether arising from sensory manifestations (as shape, color, sound, etc.), a meaningful design’ or pattern, or something else (as a personality in which high spiritual qualities are manifest). So to cut it short, he is talking about something that gives satisfaction to the mind. we will understand more what he meant in the future lines. 

“How you feel? How are you feeling right now?”

This sentence has two meaning. First he is asking us how do we feel about what he just said and secondly he is asking himself and coming with an answer in the next phrase. 

“Actually, I am real good but a little bit uncomfortable. I am not sure if I’m a dog or a pig or what else. But then people come and put the pearl necklace on me”

“Pearls before swine” or “casting pearls” may refer to a quotation from Matthew 7:6 in Jesus’s Sermon on the Mount: “Do not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces.” The meaning?  “Some people just cannot appreciate what is sacred and holy”.  But, on the other hand, we have pearls:  Pearls of wisdom, of truth, pearls of good advice, These are the pearls that straighten people out if only they would receive them, so should we just not waste our time on such people…such swine?

“I laugh more than I did before”

Namjoon may be not able to find an answer to his question. But nonetheless, he is happier now. If you heard some of past songs like ‘always’ You will understand how deep he was into depression and sadness. 

“I dreamt of becoming a superhero, now it feels like I really became one” 

Yes, it goes without saying that NAmjoon’s music and lyrics inspire many and save them from their dark space. If that’s not a superhero, then what is he?

“But as it goes on there is so much blabbering”

Even though they are influencing many people positively they will always be someones who will talk foolishly of them and their work. 

“One says run the other says stop” 

If this ain’t every comment section under every Korean article. People have divided point of views and here he said that you can’t listen to everyone and you can’t please them all

“This one says look at the forest that one says look at the wildflower”

This makes me recall these lines 27 “Consider how the wild flowers grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 28 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you—you of little faith!29 And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. Luke 12:27-30 New International Version (NIV). One thing to take from this is that people say different things and you don’t know which one to believe. And he doesn’t know which one to follow.

“My shadow, I wrote and called it hesitation”

The shadow here is not any shadow. It’s the shadow from Jung’s map of the soul. The first stage in the exploration of the unconscious, according to Jung, is an encounter with one’s shadow archetype. Over the course of one’s life, certain personality traits elicit negative feedback and even punishment from others. This negative feedback creates anxiety resulting in these traits being pushed away from awareness into the unconscious where they form the shadow – the “dark” side of one’s personality. To become aware of and integrate the shadow into consciousness is often a difficult and sometimes heroic endeavor. Here RM is aware of the existence of such thing within him and that alone is amazing. 

“It has never hesitated after becoming that. It keeps appearing under the stage or the light. Keep glaring at me scorchingly like a heat wave” 

Since RM became famous he developed a shadow, his dark side. And this one appears mostly when he is on stage or under the light of the cameras. 

“Hey, have you ever forgotten why you even started this? you were just digging it that someone was listening. Sometimes everything sounds like freaking nonsense. You know what comes of you when you are drunk … like immaturity” 

This whole verse is spoken by his shadow. 

“Someone like me, ain’t good enough for music. Someone like me ain’t good enough for the truth. Someone like me ain’t good enough for calling. Someone like me ain’t good enough to be a muse” 

Here it’s a stage where he started believing his shadow and thinking he is not good enough. 

“The flaws of mine that I know. Maybe that’s all I have got really. The world is actually not interested in my clumsiness at all” 

He calls his work clumsiness and thinks that maybe the world is not really interested in his music. Again, this is just him battling his shadow.  

“The regrets that I don’t get sick of anymore. I tumble with them every night until I'm disgusted and twist the irreversible time habitually“

BTS seemed to always have regrets after most stages. Always feeling sorry for the fans even after making the tiniest mistakes that no one but they can see and hear. And of course, before he goes to sleep is when he recalls the whole nightmarish day. 

“There is something that raised me up every time. The first question: The three syllables of my name and the word ‘but’ that should come before any of those”

He means by these lines when people accuse him of his past mistakes. When he apologized and moved on. But not just that. Whenever someone is accused of something, another one will be like “But Namjoon did this and that”. 

“So I’m askin’ once again. yeah. who the hell am I?”

You feel how heavy this question became after he told us how he struggles with his inner self and the world he was brought to live in.  

“Tell me your names baby. Do you wanna die? Oh, do you wanna go? Do you wanna fly? where’s your soul? where’s your dream? Do you think you’re alive?”

These are questions that the audience might think they are mainly for them but it’s also questions that he is asking himself. Because it’s only ith questions taht we find answers. It can also be questions asked by his shadow for RM. and it the next verse he will answer those. 

“Hey, my name is R. The ‘me’ that I remember and people know. The ‘me’ that I created myself to vent out. Yeah, maybe I have been deceiving myself. Maybe I have been lying. But I am not embarrassed anymore this is the map of my soul”

Here RM accepts his map of the soul. He accepts his shadow and persona and so on. He says that it’s true he tried to blend in with what people wanted from him. He tried to create someone they will love. But he is no more in conflict with himself. 

“Dear myself you must never lose your temperature. Cuz you neither need to be warm or cold”

He is now who he wants to be. Who he needs to be.

“Though sometimes I might be hypocritical or pretend to be evil“

He is human so he can’t always be perfect and he can’t always act as he wishes

“This is the barometer of my direction I want to keep. The ‘me’ that I want myself to be. The ‘me’ that people want me to be. The ‘me’ that you love and the ‘me’ that I create. The ‘me’ that’s smiling. The ‘me’ that’s sometimes in tears. Vividly breathing each second and every moment even now. Persona.“

To understand what he is saying we need to define ‘persona’.The word persona was used in Roman times to signify a mask worn by an actor. In an analogous manner, in Jungian psychology,  the persona represents the social mask that each of us “wear” in our interaction with others in society. Or to put it differently, it represents the personality that we try to portray to others.

You will think so he is going to create a persona to please people? No not really because it’s the person he wants to be. 

“Who the hell I am? I just wanna go. I just wanna fly. I just wanna give you all the voices till I die. I just wanna give you all the shoulders when you cry” 

But even after all this, he doesn’t know who he is yet. But one thing for sure is that he answered his shadow’s questions. He wants to do it all and not stick to one thing. By all I mean. He wants to be a singer who comforts you when you cry and be your voice when you don’t have one. H want to fly and reach higher and go to places he has never to before. that’s his PERSONA. 

Wow that took a good hour. I hope you liked it and it helped you understand the genius behind these lyrics 

By @mimibtsghost

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Wishin’ you would come and save me

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SKOOL LUV AFFAIR vs PERSONA

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bts went from crashing school busses to psychoanalysis and it was all planned 

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PERSONA is here.

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arianagrande: Loves, U are everything & more. u are never alone, u always have me & this family. all we need is each other! love u & I’m always here for u

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he knows

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who the hell am i

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this look came for my neck

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Skool Luv Affair Comeback Trailer  X MAP OF THE SOUL: Persona Comeback Trailer

Cr twt  _jinnarrr

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2014 VS 2019 

I cannot believe how they probably had planned since 2014 & the lyrics from 2014 & 2019 is so different. You can really see the journey….I’m not crying. 

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where’s your soul? where’s your dream? do you think you’re alive?