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i think i might delete this tumblr, I'm in a better place w high restriction (900 cals) and i hate the meanspo on here ahah, makes me demotivated plus thinspo tag is deaaad
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Lol
Thursday: ok so today was a long ass day and Im so tired so not a long Update from here, but good news is total calories for today was 1600! Which is very much closer to my goal than the other days so I would say today was a success. Goal for tomorrow is keeping it under 1500 and then I'll work my way down to 900. I think it's better that way, and since I'm on holiday I think it's harder to start day one as 900 calories. Oh well if anyone cares, I drove from Germany to Prague and tomorrow we will head to Budapest and then lastly Romania and attend a wedding so yay. I have been feeling very bloated today, maybe it was because of my 3000 cal binge yesterday lol? Well hopefully it will be gone tomorrow. I will head to bed now see ya. Friday: so guess What ya girl did todayy, no I didn't binge, I stayed in my calorie goal I sat for myself yesterday ayyyy. Lmao so proud. I was in a total of 1400 calories!! But even though I went 100 under my cal goal I'm still only going to go 100 down tomorrow so my goal is 1400, and I am going to a wedding so let's see how I handle that one ahah, oh well another victory is that I wore shorts today??? I felt hella fat lmao ofc but I did it?? I need to also work on a lil bit of self acceptance if I ever want to be happy with my body (even at 105lbs). I can't wait till next summer where I hopefully can enjoy the summer fully and not have weight to worry about atleast. Tomorrow I'm going shopping (lol fuck) for a skirt because I would rather wear skirts than short bc of my thunder thiiiighs. I also can't wait to share these weeks w/ y'all!! So productive I think. And also the way it started and how it's looking now is progress!! I also love writing my thoughts down and people reading it hehe. But fuck man week 1 is already almost done. 14 to go then! Also if you are reading and enjoying, should I keep posting weekly updates or daily? Like I don't even think I can post daily but if it means I get to get response to every single day it would be awesome. AnywYs I'll try and get some sleep! Nighty Saturday: had a very bad day today. Everything was fine until i had to change for the wedding lol. Ended up having the first panic attack in months and I cried for (I kid you not) 3 hours straight. And like every 30 min I was done crying about something and then I moved on to the next thing I was sad about it was a hot mess. So instead of going out and having fun (which let me tell you I have been waiting for for about a month lol) I stayed home and cried. A lot of things is going on lol my life is a mess.. My total of calories today was 1100 so I stayed under 1400 which meeeeans, I'm going to eat 1300 tomorrow :))) I had a very bad day today and I think it's okay to have those days, just not too many of them. Goodnight lovelies Sunday: Sooo today i didnt reach my goal lol. Ate around 1500 cals because i was with some romanian family and They like F E E D ahah. Love em. Anyways didnt reach my goal so Im going to try to hit it tomorrow (1300 cals) wish me luck! Im very tired because i have been driving since 8 pm last night and it's 6 am now lolss, bye Monday: okay soooo lol. Ya girl doing bad ahah. Ah well not sooo bad but I ended up at total 1500 cals again lols, but idk It was a good day! Even though I felt so fat lmao but I know it's going to change when I just get down to 900 cals. Also I promise I will try a bit harder now ahaha, actually want to show some results so better get to work. I'm still on holiday so weigh in will be on Wednesday or thursday idk yet. I hate my new body because before I was able to fit in a size 36 sometimes 38 and now I'm a flipping 42 :)). Amazing just amazing. Oh well 2 1/2 months to my first goal and 4 1/2 to my ugw I can do this!! Goal for tomorrow is again 1300 and this time I'll make it trustttt meeeeee. Nighttt!! Tuesday: So lol. I changed my plans because i wanted to enjoy my last day on vacation sooo i ate 2500 cals in total ahah. I actually planned for 1500 But What Can You dooo. I underestimated calories in a sandwich lmao. But anyways my holiday is over so I can get back to normal tomorrow but since I'm traveling home tomorrow and all that I'm going to again aim for 1300 cals but then when I'm home again I'm going to go directly to 1100 cals so I can get faster down to 900 cal. Anyways today was a good day! Even though I have been getting these waves of 'depression feels' ?? Like they last for 2-5 min and then they go away. Haven't had them in 5 years lmao. Oh well, goodnight!
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I need this on my computer lol
Thursday: ok so today was a long ass day and Im so tired so not a long Update from here, but good news is total calories for today was 1600! Which is very much closer to my goal than the other days so I would say today was a success. Goal for tomorrow is keeping it under 1500 and then I'll work my way down to 900. I think it's better that way, and since I'm on holiday I think it's harder to start day one as 900 calories. Oh well if anyone cares, I drove from Germany to Prague and tomorrow we will head to Budapest and then lastly Romania and attend a wedding so yay. I have been feeling very bloated today, maybe it was because of my 3000 cal binge yesterday lol? Well hopefully it will be gone tomorrow. I will head to bed now see ya. Friday: so guess What ya girl did todayy, no I didn't binge, I stayed in my calorie goal I sat for myself yesterday ayyyy. Lmao so proud. I was in a total of 1400 calories!! But even though I went 100 under my cal goal I'm still only going to go 100 down tomorrow so my goal is 1400, and I am going to a wedding so let's see how I handle that one ahah, oh well another victory is that I wore shorts today??? I felt hella fat lmao ofc but I did it?? I need to also work on a lil bit of self acceptance if I ever want to be happy with my body (even at 105lbs). I can't wait till next summer where I hopefully can enjoy the summer fully and not have weight to worry about atleast. Tomorrow I'm going shopping (lol fuck) for a skirt because I would rather wear skirts than short bc of my thunder thiiiighs. I also can't wait to share these weeks w/ y'all!! So productive I think. And also the way it started and how it's looking now is progress!! I also love writing my thoughts down and people reading it hehe. But fuck man week 1 is already almost done. 14 to go then! Also if you are reading and enjoying, should I keep posting weekly updates or daily? Like I don't even think I can post daily but if it means I get to get response to every single day it would be awesome. AnywYs I'll try and get some sleep! Nighty Saturday: had a very bad day today. Everything was fine until i had to change for the wedding lol. Ended up having the first panic attack in months and I cried for (I kid you not) 3 hours straight. And like every 30 min I was done crying about something and then I moved on to the next thing I was sad about it was a hot mess. So instead of going out and having fun (which let me tell you I have been waiting for for about a month lol) I stayed home and cried. A lot of things is going on lol my life is a mess.. My total of calories today was 1100 so I stayed under 1400 which meeeeans, I'm going to eat 1300 tomorrow :))) I had a very bad day today and I think it's okay to have those days, just not too many of them. Goodnight lovelies Sunday: Sooo today i didnt reach my goal lol. Ate around 1500 cals because i was with some romanian family and They like F E E D ahah. Love em. Anyways didnt reach my goal so Im going to try to hit it tomorrow (1300 cals) wish me luck! Im very tired because i have been driving since 8 pm last night and it's 6 am now lolss, bye
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Finally passed my LW and the numbers are flying down down and away from me
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Be prepared to let go of familiar faces throughout your journey. Be ready to let go of anyone who doesn’t clap for you the way you clap for them.
Reyna Biddy (via deeplifequotes)
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Can I make my arms shrink like down to half what my arms are now in about 5 hours?
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You shouldn’t point out things about people’s appearances if they can’t fix it in ten seconds.
Something my sister said once, that’s become an important thing to me (via legally-undead)
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✨ body check 10/7-17✨
waist: 63 cm thighs: 46.5 cm
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What goals
✨ body check 10/7-17✨
waist: 63 cm thighs: 46.5 cm
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GOAL WEIGHT
OMG!!! I am at my UGW!!! Even with all the binging I’ve been doing over the last month I’m finally 106lbs (I’m 5'9)! I’ve been doing 30-40min on the elliptical every day and walking home from school and it finally paid off.
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I want to be the girl that people talk about when they see how slim she got.
I want to be the girl that people regret turning down.
I want to be the girl that people are jealous of.
But I also really want to be the girl who doesn’t care so fucking much about those things.
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