bullmoozehachi - Tumblr blog

[bullmoozehachi]

I'm not Christian, but it's Easter and I saw a post of some resurrection artworks, there were some well known paintings in there, but I thought about doing mine and I didn't have anywhere to post, so here it is haha, anyways, I was a Catholic for all of my childhood, so I don't dislike the faith.

I know I'm not posting much here, the purpose to somethings in my life sort of hides from me every now and then, but I've been trying to forge myself still, but working on raw iron isn't easy lmao!

Peace out, If we can pray to anything, let's pray for health, peace and well being for everybody. I may post more tomorrow, so, see ya!

[bullmoozehachi]

So I deleted my last post, it was a bit too long and sort of lazy on its writing, anyways, there I talked a little about planes, war thunder, how the Liberator is clunky and difficult to fly, I also talked about the days I used to play League of Legends, (some ages ago) and how I liked playing as a jungler, I loved that freedom that the jungler has, you are constantly roaming around the map, participating in every teamfight, every objective, I have amazing memories of playing LOL with my friends, yeah, friends, haha, can you believe I had some? I miss them... I met all of them on the game though, so we never hang out in real life, but we used to talk so much, about every cool thing, anyways...

On my last post I also talked about how I got season banned in Overwatch, I'm not toxic but I'm a bit of a quitter when I don't feel like playing, and how I miss my Moira, I love everything about that woman! She's so much like me really, and her design was inspired by Mukuru from Yu Yu Hakusho, I never read it anywhere but I know it, haha.

I was thinking today about some ideas for my band, the songs will be mostly heavy, but it won't be something that someone would think is way too heavy, well, maybe someone would think that, but it will have melody, harmony, counterpoints, clean guitar parts... I'll try to add some of my influences in there, so it'll have a bit of everything, but without being too confuse. By the way, speaking of the name, I think I'll stick with Misty Mountainside, I'm still not sure, but I think it sounds cool, sort of exotic, sort of tropical winter lmao..

I've been trying to be more careful with orthographic mistakes, but considering that English is my second language and I'm one hundred percent self taught, mistakes will be inevitable, sooner or later they'll appear, so as a drummer, I need a drummer!

I think I'll create a SoundCloud, dig a couple of stuff in there, and maybe someone will show up, i could also create a cover channel, (I used to have one) but I think this formula is not what I'm looking for. Like, I want to throw myself into this as a musician, a less than average one but still a musician, I have zero desire into being or being with an "influencer"...

Ah, on my last post I also talked a little about how I like aeroplanes, like, I wish I could become a pilot, but my self harm scars would make it hard for me to get a job in that area, still I like planes, I want to be rich enough that one day I can buy myself at least a small glider, like that one on the cover of Hergest Ridge, It must be such a magical thing to be up there, in trance with the airwaves.

Well, I'm going for today, while I'm posting weird stuff here, at least it's a sign I'm not dead yet, so I'll try to post here every night, forever, so people will know (if there is someone here) that I didn't $#-_$@ myself lmao. Anyways, I'll post more here tomorrow, specially about the band, until then, may the mountains of madness guide those who can't fall away from reality, and may your artsy cringe stuff live long, at least long enough until you can find a great use for it, Godspeed!

[bullmoozehachi]

=')

[bullmoozehachi]

Daydreams and fairytales roam the sandy beach unscathed, swiftly treading through the path where diamond pebbles lie.

[bullmoozehachi]

My senses are confused, but my love for you is embryonic.

I love you in every flapping manner of mine.

[bullmoozehachi]

When I read the news that Akira Sensei died, I wasn't very sad, I think it was some shell shock I had, I never had real friends in my life, and no brother or sister, also, both my parents never spent a lot of time with me, so my biggest friends always were on the tv, growing up I didn't have lots of rules so every second I tried to watch my favorite shows, among them, Dragon Ball was one that I watched probably a thousand times, it was funny, different, special... I could write so much about how this show affected my life, specially considering how direct it is, bad guy comes, you train very hard, beat the bad guy and then enjoy a great time with your friends, family, nature... When I'm working out, I try to train like a saiyan, when I'm trying to get smarter, I try to be like Bulma and her father, when something goes wrong, I try to be resilient like Gohan, when I need wisdom, I try to hold a little and think what's the best to do, like Piccolo, when I'm feeling insecure, inferior, feeling like I'm not enough, I try to be proud like Vegeta, the prince of all Saiyans and of a legacy, that like heroes in a world of dragons, live forever, what should I say about Son Goku? Kakaratto, a loner himself who never had much until he met his friends and his beautiful wife... I haven't read Dr. Slump yet, life is so short and we always have so much to do that some great things are unfortunately let to the next day, but I'll try to read ep after writing here... Well, I'm not sad, because I strongly believe that death is not an end, but a transition to a calmer, lazier, and very breezy eternal realm, where your wishes are like clouds floating around, and your memory is like a mountain of light. That is how the world will remember him i hope, a mountain of light, that helped the lives of many who were born into oblivion to be coloured with love, life and adventures, so I'm grateful more than sad, and, without knowing much about Sensei and his personal life, which is something that I always do with those I respect the most, in order to give them privacy, I just hope that he had a calm beautiful life, full of great happy moments, because that's what he gave to the world. I'll also try to make a new drawing tonight, (it's been several months since I made one) and maybe write a song, at least a short instrumental will come, maybe called Dragons, considering it's still the year of the Dragon right? I still wish I could have met him, shake his hand, give him a hug and say thank you very much, I hope I'll have the chance on the next saga... So long, thanks for all and Kamehameha Sensei!!!

[bullmoozehachi]

Sometimes I feel like the reality I spawned into isn't the one I was meant to, so everything that I do is expecting that those who were meant to reach it aren't here yet, they may be born in a distant timeline or in another galaxy, maybe they're in a different mindset in their lives right now, so it'll be a long journey for both them and specially me, that's better than believing that no one cares, I mean, I like to isolate myself, and I'm simply unable to be sociable or to swim with flow, alongside the other fish, I'll swim the waterfalls until I die and really? That's fine! This does not annoy me one bit, I find it hard to miss what seems so uninteresting, and then again, I was a loner for all of my life, that's all I know, It's hard to miss what was never there.

I think I was simply born to be distant, my ancestors were probably sailors, fishermen, monks, sheepherds, or maybe solitary hunter gatherers, who spent most of their lives far from society, slowly becoming one with nature and thinking more than speaking.

My mystic antlers are growing now, I hope they can help me to hear better, hear the waves, the particles, the resonating matter, and I hope I'll never break them in fights, fights are unnecessary, at least most of them are... but I just wish I knew what I am, once you do life is so much easier.

Regardless, it's Friday soon, so have a great one!

[bullmoozehachi]

How many times did you fell in love in your life? What is love even?? Is it just a chemical reaction in our brain to trigger us to reproduce? Is it finding in someone the many qualities that we all seek in others, in ourselves maybe? Well, love comes in many forms, many shades, there's the love for material things, like your car that your father gave to you before he died, there's the love for memories, those we can't live without, that every now and then are vivid in our minds, there's the love for a hobby, like for me it's listening to music, running, working out, watching my favourite shows... And there's the love for people, when we like someone in a way that we can barely function without thinking about that one person, I felt this one very few times in my life really, I remember being strung for girls only twice, maybe 3 times depending on how I remember feeling about that one... This feeling called love is very weird, it comes, it goes... We love the winter but when the spring comes in we don't miss the same old winter anymore, then it's Autumn again, with the beautiful shades of a setting nature, like a star very distant in the horizon, then winter again and so it goes on... It's like the Ouroboros, the snake which eats It's own tail, spinning in a constant cycle of death and rebirth. We reproduce, we love, and even though we know it is going to die, like all things, we fall deep into it again. I don't know what love is, but I know that it is both dangerous and beautiful, sad and melancholic, but for us, such a sociable species, it is like air, and even though the concept of love may be relative we still search for it, like some search for God, maybe God is love, maybe Love is God, synonyms? Who knows...

[bullmoozehachi]

By the way yes, all of my Pokémon have names, since ever, in every game I always give names to my Pokémon, I think it's important to have a name, one of your own, that's why I gave myself the name Hachi, I've got nothing against my actual name, it's a good one, but having one that I picked, instead of someone else deciding how I was going to be called, is for me very important. I wanna make a post here someday showing all my Pokémon and their names, telling the story one by one, this one is Strider, one of my last two buddies, I won't grind a new buddy after him so it's all going to be very special for my code friends and me from now on...

[bullmoozehachi]

Finally level 41 haha! God I spent so much time into lvl 40 lmao, Well, I didn't want to complete the requirements to climb, like, 30 raids? I didn't feel like going out very often, and whenever I'm out there's not a single raid that I can actually make on my own, and the raid passes are way too expensive, I'm pretty sure I'm not going further than lvl 42, first of all because it's a symbolic number (there's even a great band with that name), and second, the hitchhiker's guide, 42!! And well, if it wasn't for my bucket list pokémon that I still lack in the pokedex, a.k.a: Raikou, Ho-oh, Kyogre and the fucking Tauros, which is the last one for Kanto, I would have quit this game years ago... Sometimes I uninstall it for several months but here I am, level 41, and yeah, this is the XP right off the bat, it was all accumulated from the previous level.

[bullmoozehachi]

Been thinking about band names, it is not an easy thing to do for sure, specially since it feels like every name starts to annoy me sooner or later... But I went through many and, Misty Mountainside is one that I always liked for a couple of reasons: first of all it's two words, I think it's great because a lot of the bands from the seventies that I love were like this, two beautiful words resonating together, but there are one word names that I like, like Liberator, which I always thought sounded very Thrash Metal haha, and what do the names mean? maybe if you were here right now you'd ask, Well, Liberator comes from the B-24 Liberator from ww2, I like planes a lot, and the Liberator was very beautiful, plus the name sounds badass, and the plane's role into breaking the Reich's factory output, which it honourably completed alongside the Flying fortress was important to end the evil of the reich into 5 years, if not for the heavy bombers maybe the evil wouldn't even lose the war at all, who knows... Misty Mountainside is a more complex name to explain, I don't know where it came from really, but I remember well how it came to me, I was thinking about a band name and I tried to close my eyes and picture an image that would resemble how I was feeling at the time, what came to my mind was the image of a literal 'foggy roadside', then I started playing with the words a little, I wanted the 'side" to be in the name because I think this is really cool of the English language, in my native language we don't have that, I think, and you can make many great words: waterside, lakeside, seaside, riverside, countryside, mountainside... I like mountains a lot so the Mountainside was my favourite one, then I just changed the foggy to Misty, because, I don't know why really, pokémon maybe? Lmao! Misty sounds better than foggy anyways. Later, thinking on that name I remembered that there's the Misty mountains from the middle Earth, and I thought that even though it was not them the name was after, people who like Tolkien and who would maybe hear about the band would feel curious and give it a try, I'm not good at enterprising so the few things I do I always try making them to myself, If I really like it, then maybe someone will also like... Notwithstanding, there's also Led Zeppelin, the Giants who walked upon Earth and who I totally love, in a mix of two of their songs, Black mountainside and Misty Mountain hop, they were also huge fans of Tolkien haha, I remember an interview that Jimmy mentions that they never tried to write the same song twice with LZ, each song would be unique, have a different face, I wanted my band to be like that... But the real story was really about picturing how I felt at this one time, sitting on my bed, with an old guitar on my lap and a handful of dreams in my head, that's how many bands start I guess... I think I should just go forward with Misty Mountainside. Well, This account will be my little diary for some time, I think it's better to write about myself here than in the back of some dusty book for some reason, and here, on my little island, full of redwoods and deers, mammoth trees and lilac skies, I can be myself more than in the real world, which is oh so boring for me... Haha.

[bullmoozehachi]

Wash me to the shore, O melancholy of death.

[bullmoozehachi]

I like playing music a lot, I want to release a record someday, at least one would be very cool, and it would be heavy, playing heavy is like flying a rocket towards the stars! I don't wanna die before making a record. =)

[bullmoozehachi]

Kumori 曇　

[bullmoozehachi]

Did you know that these dark spots are actually scars? Having scars is a sign that you went thought but you're still around. This beautiful word, resilience, it rings so beautifully.

[bullmoozehachi]

A cool thing about memes is the chance of making someone laugh, that's really cool

[bullmoozehachi]

Context: There's a show called Ranma which I like a lot, it's one of my comfort shows so my existence requires me to watch it frequently, and I love it! Like Akane, I love Akane.

*BTW the one on the image is not Akane, her name is Nanoka.