bumpyfrog

[bumpyfrog]

category 5 bruce incident no survivors

[bumpyfrog]

“Three full strokes across that creamed area” - Sam Reich 2025

[bumpyfrog]

I mean what do you THINK happens to the calves of dairy cows? Factory farms separate the calves from their mothers and the male ones end up as veal or beef, so y’know, dead. Female calves who aren’t selected for beef end up as dairy cows which means being bred over and over until they are too old to produce milk and are then killed. cheese doesn’t exist without a whole pile of dead cows

Every time you eat cheese we fire a calf into the sun

[bumpyfrog]

[bumpyfrog]

Lieutenant Tisarwat is A Character of All Time. She’s thousands of years old, she’s seventeen, she’s less than one. She has a horribly embarrassing crush and the keys to every warship in the sector. She wants to kill herself (first person) and she wants to kill herself (third person). She’s the universe’s most ambitious political mastermind she’s an impulsive baby and she’s angling for governor of a system near you. 

[bumpyfrog]

reminds me of the local wine shop here that put out a sign that says "we try the bad wines so you dont have to" made me stop walking cause i was laughing so hard the nostalgia sommelier

[bumpyfrog]

HOW do I make my tofu crispy????

[bumpyfrog]

some people just have no true appreciation for terrible women. oh she killed and ate people? well maybe she was hungry. "I cant defend her anymore-" well then fucking stand aside so i can talk to my client

[bumpyfrog]

ⓘ Tip You can skip part of the day by taking a nap.

[bumpyfrog]

Remember "Reduce, Reuse, Recycle" ? I feel like there's been a distancing from the "reduce" and "reuse" part and a favoritism towards "recycle" by corporate American.

Capitalism can still thrive with recycling in the mix. You buy Plastic Thing 1, throw it away after one use, and they take that and recycle it into Plastic Thing 2 and sell it back to you. All while continuing to harm the environment.

Reusing puts a damper on things. They can't sell you Plastic Thing 2 when you're still using Plastic Thing 1. Plastic forks, for example- there is literally no reason why you can't reuse plastic forks more than once (aside from maybe microplastics, but it's too late for that)

Reducing is the one everyone wants to ignore. Just don't buy Plastic Thing 1. You don't need Plastic Thing 1. Pick up a set of metal forks and use those for years. Convenience is killing the planet

[bumpyfrog]

The central joke of the Ulysses Ogre meme hinges on the Ogre holding themselves to unreasonable standards by expecting to fully grasp one of the most famously difficult works of the 20th Century after only a single reading, which just doesn't work if you substitute your favourite video game, because frankly, your favourite video game is not Ulysses – but to be fair, the overwhelming majority of books are not Ulysses either. There's probably a video game somewhere out there that's as textually challenging as Ulysses, and it's probably some random-ass RPG Maker game from 2006 with an author whose name is a dick joke and a present fandom of approximately eleven people.

[bumpyfrog]

young man. what is that you have found.

I said young man. you picked it up off the ground.

I said young man. you should put that thing down.

I don't think! that! you! should! eat that!

[bumpyfrog]

their polyamorous swag

[bumpyfrog]

I’m really only into men when I’m on T. Because T makes you so horny that you become less discriminating. Which also leads me to believe more cis men must be bisexual but they’re weird about it

[bumpyfrog]

*person who has rich parents* you can do like anything you want in this world you can literally drop out of highschool and go to Europe for a decade and come back to build a family and start a small business but it's like you have to want it you can't just expect things to come to you without you putting the work in

[bumpyfrog]

i think the near-extinction of people making fun, deep and/or unique interactive text-based browser games, projects and stories is catastrophic to the internet. i'm talking pre-itch.io era, nothing against it.

there are a lot of fun ones listed here and here but for the most part, they were made years ago and are now a dying breed. i get why. there's no money in it. factoring in the cost of web hosting and servers, it probably costs money. it's just sad that it's a dying art form.

anyway, here's some of my favorite browser-based interactive projects and games, if you're into that kind of thing. 90% of them are on the lists that i linked above.

A Better World - create an alternate history timeline

Alter Ego - abandonware birth-to-death life simulator game

Seedship - text-based game about colonizing a new planet

Sandboxels or ThisIsSand - free-falling sand physics games

Little Alchemy 2 - combine various elements to make new ones

Infinite Craft - kind of the same as Little Alchemy

ZenGM - simulate sports

Tamajoji - browser-based tamagotchi

IFDB - interactive fiction database (text adventure games)

Written Realms - more text adventure games with a user interface

The Cafe & Diner - mystery game

The New Campaign Trail - US presidential campaign game

Money Simulator - simulate financial decisions

Genesis - text-based adventure/fantasy game

Level 13 - text-based science fiction adventure game

Miniconomy - player driven economy game

Checkbox Olympics - games involving clicking checkboxes

BrantSteele.net - game show and Hunger Games simulators

Murder Games - fight to the death simulator by Orteil

Cookie Clicker - different but felt weird not including it. by Orteil.

if you're ever thinking about making a niche project that only a select number of individuals will be nerdy enough to enjoy, keep in mind i've been playing some of these games off and on for 20~ years (Alter Ego, for example). quite literally a lifetime of replayability.

[bumpyfrog]