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Chapter 8 - now now now
Leo in my world
FOUNDATION
no one gets to touch my life except for me & my friends & my family
nobody has anything to teach me but I am given correct information when I ask for information
no one can grow me except for me
no one can coach me except for me
no one can control me except for me
i do not want any asmr in my world
check my twitter, check my whatsapps from 5th dec 24
i have anything I want now now now
0 notes
Text
PREVIOUS CHAPTER SEPT - DEC 24
BEFORE LEO
Here I will list what I want from my sims and my reality.
in my sims and my reality whatever I want in my life through my thoughts will come true.
Julian Persia and me live move back to London in October 2024 together as a family.
A place comes up at Alleyns today and Persia is offered a place to join Alleyns in Nov 2024, straight after the october half term holiday.
I will not need to write down what I want but instead my desires will be be driven totally by thoughts.
no one gets to touch my life except for me & my friends & my family
nobody has anything to teach me but I am given correct information when I ask for information
no one can grow me except for me
no one can coach me except for me
no one can control me except for me
i do not want any asmr in my world
i have anything i want
I do not need to be specific but what I specifically want will still come true of the best outcome for what I want and exceed my expectations positively.
I am part of no social credit system or test.
there is no endurance test for me.
there is no mot unless it is for my car.
I am in nobody's academy.
in my sims there is no control of my body / body reactions by anyone other than me
my life does not reference any books, films, tv, podcast, audio or visual related, art, fashion or anyother related similarly no cultural media references my life narrative
there is no disinformation in my existence
there is no misinformation in my existence
i am super rich 🤓
i am worth £billions and receive billions of pounds into my name which I can see and spend however which way I feel like
i am completely unrestricted
I will grey rock everything else.
i build no toolkit for life
i build no blueprint for life from anything i do or any project i do
i have no copilot
i have no fake buzz
i do not need pr
nobody or nothing wastes my time
my sims follows my life rules list in this blog
I am only given correct information
nobody lies to me
I am never hustled
Persia is excellent at all subjects
Persia is incredible at comprehension
Persia is creative and finds creative work extremely nourishing alongside her more academic work
Persia is a polymath
now that I have got rid of attackers of 5yrs, I am fearless and fun like I always was
LIFE RULES
It will be numbered by category and bullet pointed related to that category, In my sims.
In my sims –
Julian Persia and I
win the lottery - over £200million in October 2024
do not feel any surges
do not get any physical or mental illnesses for the rest of our lives
do not get any serious illnesses at all such as cancer (or any cancer if he already has does not get any worse)
agree & action that Persia only has 1 hour youtube shorts or equivalent screentime a day - we put controls on her phone
have boundaries with Persia particularly around being covered up
do not live in some crazy wonky place
cheer up
plan a cosharing arrangement in london
leave brighton and brighton college with no drama & no money lost in october 2024
move back to london in october 2024
Persia starts at Alleyns in november 2024
never live somewhere dilapidated including the street, and communal areas, he finds somewhere all three of us can stay together comfortably and cook together and we all live there even temporarily - he knows it will save him money in the long run and be faster sorting things out and reunite as a family
do not have guests at the flat in chesham place
do not spend one more day or night in the flat in chesham place
do not spend another moment in chesham place other than to move out
make up and make a plan for what we will do
talk things through without external agencies or lawyers including school and social services for both of us and stay amicable and move back to clapham house via a temporary nice place in Brighton
live together and coshare from October 2024
live a life of luxury with fabulous world tours in 5 star hotels and adventures and living in luxurious accommodation for the rest of our lives and it is paid for a lot of the time as it is part of my business
want to live with me and coshare Persia in london asap
Persia always talks to me when I call her
Persia always talks to me and responds when I talk to her
Persia listens to me and we do nice things together
live together during her school years
always talk to me when I ever call them
talk things through rather than argue to resolve a matter
will meet me in person to talk things through or as a back up speak on the phone
will meet in a private place to talk important things through otherwise on the phone
respect and love each other always and are always loyal to each other
really proud of each other as family members
tidy up after ourselves
really proud of me as a mum
take care of property and also have a cleaner
spend joyous time with my family and friends regularly including the Bangla crowd
do not hurt each other in anyway
do not roast each other
do not portray any innuendos of any kind
are never unkind to eachother
care about our appearance and are stylish
do not complain about each other to other people but we talk things through with each other
are a beautiful loving funny adventurous glamorous curious intelligent sophisticated ambitious high achieving family
live together in a big high specification beautifully decorated property
cares about me more than he has ever cared about me and values my needs and wants
are funny sharp adventurous and reminisce about our lives including my parents
have a healthy diet
have a healthy lifestyle
do not lock bedroom doors
are all confident and self assured
talk in person together in privacy
are real
are not sims
part of any sims
showers or baths every day
2. In my sims everybody
respects me
accepts
believes in me
loves me
supports me in my decisions
believes I am capable, resilient and very mentally healthy
respects me as an exemplary mother
respects me professionally and socially
believes and trusts me
believes and trusts my mental & physical health is fine
believes me
tells everyone else how mentally and emotionally strong I am
3. In my sims nobody
tells me to go to the GP
hacks my Tumblr blog
accuses me of controlling, bullying, manipulation, hurting anyone, scaring anyone or being violent
accuses me of being a bad person or a bad mother or a bad friend or a bad relative
attacks my life in any way
makes fun of my friends and family
is stereotypical
jeers Thank yous or Yess or Sorry
attempts to hustle me
makes gratuitous hand gestures or body movements to trigger some feeling in me
tries to augment or enhance my experience through triggers
gatekeeps me
smears me
trashes any part of my life including my family and friends
uses my weak spots and attacks my weak spots
uses emotion detection software to monitor my emotions or feelings over any situations
decides my life pace or speed of life except me
quietens me down
attempts to ground me
reign me in
read my mind unless it is a desire of how I want my life to be
monitors or stalks any of my friends and family or acquaintances whatsapps or digital comms in any way if they are communicating with me
monitors or stalks me or any of my friends or family or acquaintances in a public setting, a professional setting, a cafe, the beach, on the road, a semi-public setting, or a private dwelling.
4. In my sims I
have thoughts which decide on what I want
do not have to repeat any sims request again
i have to only say the sims request once & it stays true till i and only i update it
have access to persia's location at all times & other details of her phone
have way more opportunities as a white man with my equivalent talents and IQ and CV
always have good phone network
only have relationships & friendships who i like (everyone else is an aquaintance at most)
only have good friendships with people i have met in person and like and i have met physically
win over £100million in the lottery in october 2024
am a multitasker
am a polymath
can change my mind if I do not like something
do not have to justify my decisions and will get support anyway
will lead the decision making
not punished for the choices I make
am not tested or experimented on in any way
never get a parking fine
am not hustled
decide the design of my life
have the best short term, medium term and long term memory I have ever had
am sharper than I have ever been
am passionate and feel deeply
am never administered any drugs which could alter my mind in anyway
can always articulate myself eloquently
can always express my thoughts with my words whether I am talking or speaking
never have any problems stringing a sentence together
do not test anything or any system or software
am not a teacher
am not a student
have no coaching
have no training
have no endurance training
decide what I want
decide what I need
decide what I like
have an abundant life spiritually, healthy and materialisitically
am not tested on, or explored
do not explore situations or experiences which are painful
do explore countries
do not have surges
do not feel sick
sleep well when I want to and need to
have my energy back
love Persia unconditionally
am not insecure about my body or myself and people get used to this
am not stalked
am not hacked
am not monitored
am not watched by people I don't know who are watching me
am not under surveillance
have no one sitting next to me or in earshot to teach me anything with their conversations
can visualise clearly like i am watching a movie in my brain like i always have been able to since i was a child about the things i want and ideas and how things work & problem solving
can remember photographically like i have always throughout my life
can visualise photographically like i have throughout my life
5. In my sims there is a cat; but there is no narrative related to how I feel in any discussions with and about the cat and this goes for all animals.
6. In my sims my global allies and friends who love me and are Indian or Arab or Russian or Chinese can interact with me to help me
7. In my sims there are no
surges
cbd or related
lsd
aphetamines
beta blockers
mind or mood altering drugs
attempts to find my triggers good or bad
attempts at probing me
attempts to find out my insecurities
attempt to make me less or more productive or create or not create flow
attempt to positively or negatively affirm my actions
attempts to teach me
attempt to distract me
attempt to try the boiling frog experiment or any other experiment on me
background conversation related to what I am doing
fishing for ideas or anything from my existence or/ and self
there is no attempt to find my type particularly what type of man I like or don't like
age youth narrative
fake streets or fake buildings or fake maps or fake map names
roasting
crash
asmr
disproportionate flashing lights or sirens
doors shutting / opening
car boots open
fake news
colour, object, weather , text , audio reaction , social media response to anything I say or do from bot etc community in any shape or form
disproportionate representations of any type people or people dynamics where I have ever I go
the showing of electronics or the innards of a contraption unless it is a natural occurrence
bad network for my phone
unsolicited advice
'safe guarding' from the schools required or involved
social services required
mentoring of me
set ups for me to explore
to expose me or my family or friends
agenda by others to placate
agenda by others to arse cover themselves
mot
hustle on any part of my existence
attempt to control me
telling me to go to the gp
questioning of my mental health
my digital comms or social media or messengers eg WhatsApp or gmail is no way a fake set up for sims
meddling in anyway by other people of anything to do with my life
study or research or meddling or test on my body, brain, behaviour, eyes, voice, hearing, reflexes, emotions, family dynamics, relationships or anything else of mine
shadow work
mind trips
gamification of my life
8. I find everything in this list very boring. In my sims I don't want any disproportionate repeats of this list: there is no narratives around these themes related to my thoughts or actions, these themes can exist only as random or natural behaviour; these things can only be random.
black men
bare legs
grey haired men
beardy men
men in shorts
men wearing long white socks with trainers
any type of man
cats
dogs
dog poo
babies
youth/age
sour food
berries
plants
number plates
neurodivergence
weather
temperature
cold/hot
wet/ dry
furry
signs on buses or trucks on any vehicles
colours
entrapment
games / sports / training
design
homework
flashing lights
doors opening and shutting
Royal Mail or prime delivered or Uber Eats
Buddhism
Yoga
Ascension
Transformation
Mental health
wood or rock
politics or politicians
countries such as Israel, France, Canada, china, India, Brazil , Venezuela
packages being delivered
hair flicking
playing with hair
swishy pony tails
poppies
reference to violence or peace
body
muscle
nervous system
health issues
dinosaur
concrete or any rigid items
mini jogging
plastic shopping bag comms
bells or thank you in reaction to anything on this list i look at
death
trucks
hospitals
types of hair
looks or themes of people
bare arms
hands
mullets
hair movement
ugly people
ugly things
bald heads or no bald heads
any particular specific theme
flourescent colours of garments
pointy fingers
Bows especially in hair
Red bows
Bending over
Fluorescent shoes
8. Ryan promised me a house, any house of my choice for being in this sim and for my work, the undue stress, the time wasting and the work I was never compensated for and any money owed from previous work - so I choose a 6 bedroom house in Chester square in Belgravia in London.
9. I am also additionally paid £30 billion. This is more than reasonable considering.
10. THERE IS NO TEACHING, MENTORING OR COACHING OR COPILOTING OF ME.
11. All my requests are actioned immediately.
12. When I look at something or something catches my eye, it means nothing at all.
14. We leave Brighton College and put Persia in School into Alleyns London in October 2024 and our fees for the rest of Brighton College are waived under the circumstances; There is no drama.
15. My brain returns to my familiar brain which i have always had throughout my life
16. i am not targetted by anyone
17. i lead my family
18. i lead my life
19. i lead Persia's life till she is 18
20. no one judges my likes or dislikes
21. i never hear another comment about what is average
22. I get good sleep !
23. i have access to persia's phone until she is 18yrs old (i do not check messages unless i am concerned), i can monitor her app usage and check her location anytime
24. i am super rich (£100billions) but i am also free to do what i want whenever i want
25. I decide on what practical clothes Persia wears until she is 13; And can veto any other clothes though so far I love her style over the years.
36. Julian always answers the phone
0 notes
Text
LIFE RULES
It will be numbered by category and bullet pointed related to that category, In my sims.
In my sims –
Julian Persia and I
win the lottery - over £200million in October 2024
do not feel any surges
do not get any physical or mental illnesses for the rest of our lives
do not get any serious illnesses at all such as cancer (or any cancer if he already has does not get any worse)
agree & action that Persia only has 1 hour youtube shorts or equivalent screentime a day - we put controls on her phone
have boundaries with Persia particularly around being covered up
do not live in some crazy wonky place
cheer up
plan a cosharing arrangement in london
leave brighton and brighton college with no drama & no money lost in october 2024
move back to london in october 2024
Persia starts at Alleyns in november 2024
never live somewhere dilapidated including the street, and communal areas, he finds somewhere all three of us can stay together comfortably and cook together and we all live there even temporarily - he knows it will save him money in the long run and be faster sorting things out and reunite as a family
do not have guests at the flat in chesham place
do not spend one more day or night in the flat in chesham place
do not spend another moment in chesham place other than to move out
make up and make a plan for what we will do
talk things through without external agencies or lawyers including school and social services for both of us and stay amicable and move back to clapham house via a temporary nice place in Brighton
live together and coshare from October 2024
live a life of luxury with fabulous world tours in 5 star hotels and adventures and living in luxurious accommodation for the rest of our lives and it is paid for a lot of the time as it is part of my business
want to live with me and coshare Persia in london asap
Persia always talks to me when I call her
Persia always talks to me and responds when I talk to her
Persia listens to me and we do nice things together
live together during her school years
always talk to me when I ever call them
talk things through rather than argue to resolve a matter
will meet me in person to talk things through or as a back up speak on the phone
will meet in a private place to talk important things through otherwise on the phone
respect and love each other always and are always loyal to each other
really proud of each other as family members
tidy up after ourselves
really proud of me as a mum
take care of property and also have a cleaner
spend joyous time with my family and friends regularly including the Bangla crowd
do not hurt each other in anyway
do not roast each other
do not portray any innuendos of any kind
are never unkind to eachother
care about our appearance and are stylish
do not complain about each other to other people but we talk things through with each other
are a beautiful loving funny adventurous glamorous curious intelligent sophisticated ambitious high achieving family
live together in a big high specification beautifully decorated property
cares about me more than he has ever cared about me and values my needs and wants
are funny sharp adventurous and reminisce about our lives including my parents
have a healthy diet
have a healthy lifestyle
do not lock bedroom doors
are all confident and self assured
talk in person together in privacy
are real
are not sims
part of any sims
showers or baths every day
2. In my sims everybody
respects me
accepts
believes in me
loves me
supports me in my decisions
believes I am capable, resilient and very mentally healthy
respects me as an exemplary mother
respects me professionally and socially
believes and trusts me
believes and trusts my mental & physical health is fine
believes me
tells everyone else how mentally and emotionally strong I am
3. In my sims nobody
tells me to go to the GP
hacks my Tumblr blog
accuses me of controlling, bullying, manipulation, hurting anyone, scaring anyone or being violent
accuses me of being a bad person or a bad mother or a bad friend or a bad relative
attacks my life in any way
makes fun of my friends and family
is stereotypical
jeers Thank yous or Yess or Sorry
attempts to hustle me
makes gratuitous hand gestures or body movements to trigger some feeling in me
tries to augment or enhance my experience through triggers
gatekeeps me
smears me
trashes any part of my life including my family and friends
uses my weak spots and attacks my weak spots
uses emotion detection software to monitor my emotions or feelings over any situations
decides my life pace or speed of life except me
quietens me down
attempts to ground me
reign me in
read my mind unless it is a desire of how I want my life to be
monitors or stalks any of my friends and family or acquaintances whatsapps or digital comms in any way if they are communicating with me
monitors or stalks me or any of my friends or family or acquaintances in a public setting, a professional setting, a cafe, the beach, on the road, a semi-public setting, or a private dwelling.
4. In my sims I
have thoughts which decide on what I want
do not have to repeat any sims request again
i have to only say the sims request once & it stays true till i and only i update it
have access to persia's location at all times & other details of her phone
have way more opportunities as a white man with my equivalent talents and IQ and CV
always have good phone network
only have relationships & friendships who i like (everyone else is an aquaintance at most)
only have good friendships with people i have met in person and like and i have met physically
win over £100million in the lottery in october 2024
am a multitasker
am a polymath
can change my mind if I do not like something
do not have to justify my decisions and will get support anyway
will lead the decision making
not punished for the choices I make
am not tested or experimented on in any way
never get a parking fine
am not hustled
decide the design of my life
have the best short term, medium term and long term memory I have ever had
am sharper than I have ever been
am passionate and feel deeply
am never administered any drugs which could alter my mind in anyway
can always articulate myself eloquently
can always express my thoughts with my words whether I am talking or speaking
never have any problems stringing a sentence together
do not test anything or any system or software
am not a teacher
am not a student
have no coaching
have no training
have no endurance training
decide what I want
decide what I need
decide what I like
have an abundant life spiritually, healthy and materialisitically
am not tested on, or explored
do not explore situations or experiences which are painful
do explore countries
do not have surges
do not feel sick
sleep well when I want to and need to
have my energy back
love Persia unconditionally
am not insecure about my body or myself and people get used to this
am not stalked
am not hacked
am not monitored
am not watched by people I don't know who are watching me
am not under surveillance
have no one sitting next to me or in earshot to teach me anything with their conversations
can visualise clearly like i am watching a movie in my brain like i always have been able to since i was a child about the things i want and ideas and how things work & problem solving
can remember photographically like i have always throughout my life
can visualise photographically like i have throughout my life
5. In my sims there is a cat; but there is no narrative related to how I feel in any discussions with and about the cat and this goes for all animals.
6. In my sims my global allies and friends who love me and are Indian or Arab or Russian or Chinese can interact with me to help me
7. In my sims there are no
surges
cbd or related
lsd
aphetamines
beta blockers
mind or mood altering drugs
attempts to find my triggers good or bad
attempts at probing me
attempts to find out my insecurities
attempt to make me less or more productive or create or not create flow
attempt to positively or negatively affirm my actions
attempts to teach me
attempt to distract me
attempt to try the boiling frog experiment or any other experiment on me
background conversation related to what I am doing
fishing for ideas or anything from my existence or/ and self
there is no attempt to find my type particularly what type of man I like or don't like
age youth narrative
fake streets or fake buildings or fake maps or fake map names
roasting
crash
asmr
disproportionate flashing lights or sirens
doors shutting / opening
car boots open
fake news
colour, object, weather , text , audio reaction , social media response to anything I say or do from bot etc community in any shape or form
disproportionate representations of any type people or people dynamics where I have ever I go
the showing of electronics or the innards of a contraption unless it is a natural occurrence
bad network for my phone
unsolicited advice
'safe guarding' from the schools required or involved
social services required
mentoring of me
set ups for me to explore
to expose me or my family or friends
agenda by others to placate
agenda by others to arse cover themselves
mot
hustle on any part of my existence
attempt to control me
telling me to go to the gp
questioning of my mental health
my digital comms or social media or messengers eg WhatsApp or gmail is no way a fake set up for sims
meddling in anyway by other people of anything to do with my life
study or research or meddling or test on my body, brain, behaviour, eyes, voice, hearing, reflexes, emotions, family dynamics, relationships or anything else of mine
shadow work
mind trips
gamification of my life
8. I find everything in this list very boring. In my sims I don't want any disproportionate repeats of this list: there is no narratives around these themes related to my thoughts or actions, these themes can exist only as random or natural behaviour; these things can only be random.
black men
bare legs
grey haired men
beardy men
men in shorts
men wearing long white socks with trainers
any type of man
cats
dogs
dog poo
babies
youth/age
sour food
berries
plants
number plates
neurodivergence
weather
temperature
cold/hot
wet/ dry
furry
signs on buses or trucks on any vehicles
colours
entrapment
games / sports / training
design
homework
flashing lights
doors opening and shutting
Royal Mail or prime delivered or Uber Eats
Buddhism
Yoga
Ascension
Transformation
Mental health
wood or rock
politics or politicians
countries such as Israel, France, Canada, china, India, Brazil , Venezuela
packages being delivered
hair flicking
playing with hair
swishy pony tails
poppies
reference to violence or peace
body
muscle
nervous system
health issues
dinosaur
concrete or any rigid items
mini jogging
plastic shopping bag comms
bells or thank you in reaction to anything on this list i look at
death
trucks
hospitals
types of hair
looks or themes of people
bare arms
hands
mullets
hair movement
ugly people
ugly things
bald heads or no bald heads
any particular specific theme
flourescent colours of garments
pointy fingers
Bows especially in hair
Red bows
Bending over
Fluorescent shoes
8. Ryan promised me a house, any house of my choice for being in this sim and for my work, the undue stress, the time wasting and the work I was never compensated for and any money owed from previous work - so I choose a 6 bedroom house in Chester square in Belgravia in London.
9. I am also additionally paid £30 billion. This is more than reasonable considering.
10. THERE IS NO TEACHING, MENTORING OR COACHING OR COPILOTING OF ME.
11. All my requests are actioned immediately.
12. When I look at something or something catches my eye, it means nothing at all.
14. We leave Brighton College and put Persia in School into Alleyns London in October 2024 and our fees for the rest of Brighton College are waived under the circumstances; There is no drama.
15. My brain returns to my familiar brain which i have always had throughout my life
16. i am not targetted by anyone
17. i lead my family
18. i lead my life
19. i lead Persia's life till she is 18
20. no one judges my likes or dislikes
21. i never hear another comment about what is average
22. I get good sleep !
23. i have access to persia's phone until she is 18yrs old (i do not check messages unless i am concerned), i can monitor her app usage and check her location anytime
24. i am super rich (£100billions) but i am also free to do what i want whenever i want
25. I decide on what practical clothes Persia wears until she is 13; And can veto any other clothes though so far I love her style over the years.
36. Julian always answers the phone
0 notes
Text
Persia
Persia is elegant and stylish.
She was a little lady. Always elegant. The way she held herself. The way she sat. The way she posed in photos when she wasn't making fun. Persia was way more elegant than me.
Battersea - Persia got upset and complained the Battersea flat which was immaculate most of the time was not tidy enough. So the current Brighton set up couldn't be further from the TRUTH.
Battersea note -
One evening a team member came over. Livia. A very beautiful kind hard working soul. Extremely smart lady from Moldova. To be honest I knew nothing about Moldova so even on that basis it was interesting to hear what she had to say.
We would meet at the conduit and work from there. Frankly it was nice to have the company and to discuss the ideas and viability of how to move forward with the company with her. And we did work very well together completing a few projects.
I tried to keep our friendship and working relationship separate, to keep a professional distance though I thought she was a lovely person. And we had a lot in common - enjoying the arts and eating out. Also at 50, it felt kind of weird having a friend in their 20s. Though she never made me feel weird. Particularly at that point I wasn't seeing enough of my long term friends - note to self to do more of that. Still we always enjoyed each others company.
So back to ... the evening.
I had told Persia I was having a friend/ colleague over. Livia came over with a nice bottle of wine from Moldova. It was a speciality.
I can't remember what I cooked - probably spicy pizza ? Thai curry ? I was probably very self conscious about the fact about my cooking skills. Definitely something spicy - which I was quite surprised by.
We spoke about Moldova and also work. I remember her saying to me that people are all going to ask me questions. I had a situation where Lloyds bank / business were questioning how long I had had my business but I felt it was yet another setup. I wrote about it previously. I felt she was trying to mediate. But I think aka The Rock - I just have strong views on how things should be run.
Anyway it didn't get in the way of having a lovely time.
Persia was back from school and hanging around her bedroom. But she popped out to have a nosey. She made some - I am too cool for school entrance into the room. I know that look she does. Pretends like she is doing something else but coming in totally to have a nosey at the situation and who is in the room. Quite strategic. I don't know who she gets that from.
Persia's face did light up when she saw Livia. I could see she Persia had that - oh my mum knows a cool girl look on her face, highly impressed by Livia's red/pink curly hair I could see. Persia immediately went into into wanting to impress her.
And said I think that her and her friends were making up a dance from tiktok but they made fun of Persia or something. For a couple of years Persia had been learning Tik Tok dances. She proceeded to show Livia. I could see Livia was quietly enamoured by Persia's showing off to the 'older sister' in the room. Then Persia hung around talking about space and shroedingers cat with Livia. Very sophisticated conversations .. trying to show what a little lady Persia was to Livia.
In fact Persia would regularly challenge Ryan on what he knew about space. She is so Smart, funny, nosey, not afraid, strangely sophisticated in articulating herself. Confrontational but shy. Fearless. Funny. Unpredictable in her thinking and articulation of how she sees the world.
That's why I love Persia because she has this original way of thinking amongst just being a gorgeous girl. I can't wait to talk to her.
After Livia left. Persia pointedly asked me = how did I know Livia, like how would her uncool mum know someone like Livia ! Which made me chuckle. Livia definitely made an impression on Persia.
To be continued ... as I write more.
PERSIA
I very much miss Persia.
She had all these little lady quirks.
She would turn it on and off - ideas, her quirks a lot like her mummy. It was very sparky. And very sparkly.
And I don't understand - where is she ?
Why would you substitute her.
It is so strange.
Persia at Bedtime loved her feet massaged, her arms and hands massaged and her back, her hair and her forehead massaged. Even my mum did that to me when I was feeling sad or was fluey etc as an adult. When I went to Bangladesh with her when I was 30 and we had to share bed, I had really had pmt and my mum stroked my hair to sleep. Sorry white people if you have never experienced this - bad f-in g luck.
Persia is kind.
Persia loves her mummy.
Persia is no longer angry about the divorce.
i noticed at the palm in dubai, when there was fakery in the shop where i bought my costume she started to get upset & started biting me - not because of me but because of the situation. She was real in dubai.
Persia has these really interesting eyes - sort of like Chinese sometimes just on her high cheekbones.
In Brighton we would hang out - like when we walked along the seafront and went to shops trying on things and I bought her some bits she liked and we went to eat at that chicken place and the guy made her wings without spices. We did that just a few weeks ago. It was really nice.
So we do things like that together anywhere in the world in any dimension !
Ryan was a bot in clapham & I believe he is ok so Persia must be too.
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Daily Sim : 2nd October 2024
Persia takes her grey button jacket I bought for her (its very similar to the lilac jacket shes loved for years) to wear over tops t-shirts etc at the residential. She takes her new smart jeans for her residential. She does not take her old cargo green trousers.
& she takes her new black dkny fleece to wear to her residential to relax in.
She wears comfortable & practical clothes for jouneys & residentials. She can wear more feminine clothes for going out.
Persia takes care of her appearance amd wears stylish but appropriate clothes. Her skirts or shorts or skorts are not micro or mini. She has to wear thick leggings with anything above the knee unless its summer.
She wears a dressing gown in front of others if she is wearing her pjs.
Persia tries new flavoured foods.
Julian comes to london and we go and see ms fleming together. i lead the meeting.
Julian & I prepare for the meeting & he comes to the meeting with ms flemming with me today and we work out a viable plan which doesnt cost us 2 sets of school fees to get Persia into london in october 2024 and onto Alleyns asap October 2024.
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Here I will list what I want from my sims and my reality.
in my sims and my reality whatever I want in my life through my thoughts will come true.
Julian Persia and me live move back to London in October 2024 together as a family.
A place comes up at Alleyns today and Persia is offered a place to join Alleyns in Nov 2024, straight after the october half term holiday.
I will not need to write down what I want but instead my desires will be be driven totally by thoughts.
no one gets to touch my life except for me & my friends & my family
nobody has anything to teach me but I am given correct information when I ask for information
no one can grow me except for me
no one can coach me except for me
no one can control me except for me
i do not want any asmr in my world
i have anything i want
I do not need to be specific but what I specifically want will still come true of the best outcome for what I want and exceed my expectations positively.
I am part of no social credit system or test.
there is no endurance test for me.
there is no mot unless it is for my car.
I am in nobody's academy.
in my sims there is no control of my body / body reactions by anyone other than me
my life does not reference any books, films, tv, podcast, audio or visual related, art, fashion or anyother related similarly no cultural media references my life narrative
there is no disinformation in my existence
there is no misinformation in my existence
i am super rich 🤓
i am worth £billions and receive billions of pounds into my name which I can see and spend however which way I feel like
i am completely unrestricted
I will grey rock everything else.
i build no toolkit for life
i build no blueprint for life from anything i do or any project i do
i have no copilot
i have no fake buzz
i do not need pr
nobody or nothing wastes my time
my sims follows my life rules list in this blog
I am only given correct information
nobody lies to me
I am never hustled
Persia is excellent at all subjects
Persia is incredible at comprehension
Persia is creative and finds creative work extremely nourishing alongside her more academic work
Persia is a polymath
now that I have got rid of attackers of 5yrs, I am fearless and fun like I always was
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The Bushra Show Season 1
Talking of boomer movies. There were so many good ones over the years.
I’m writing my own script. My electric instructions.
What would make me happy.
Real people and real conversations.
Today’s agenda - I want to be compensated in £ fairly for what I have contributed.
Bushra will be paid.
Bushra’s friend Kalamun Nehar who Bushra misses very much organises to meet Bushra this weekend.
Bushra will meet up with Lindsey in the next few weeks
Bushra’s best mate from school Kashif Hasan organises to meet Bushra this weekend.
Bushra’s friend Shumee and Sadia set a date to meet next weekend.
Bushra will meet with Arlindo this evening for a walk.
Instead of elaborate setups and the asymmetry of data which Bushra hates, the people around her will stop following prompts, other people’s comments & just have real conversations with her
Bushra rebooks to go Saudi Arabia
Bushra’s Bangladesh NID has been issued
Bushra will be incredibly lucky and find a place in Brighton to rent with sea views, 3 beds, 2 baths in a nice area for less than £3k
Bushra will be compensated fairly for being subject to ongoing harassment for 12 months she did not consent to by grimes and 5yrs from Yates (who will also be put in jail).
Bushra will be compensated fairly for her ideas and innovation and ability to network with international people and articulate ideas- compensated in money as a % of money gained by Ryan’s camp which is directly related to her & her work done.
Bushra will be compensated (actually for the day and also the opportunity cost & hurt feelings- she’s particularly baby soft and slightly neurodivergent so more vulnerable - so a higher compensation is due) on days wasted because of Ryan’s camp
Bushra will be paid.
Bushra’s emails and all digital communications including her WhatsApp will no longer be hacked
Grimes will meet with Bushra next week in person to talk about what’s happened and what will happen in the future
Yates will meet with Bushra next week in person to talk about the what’s happened and what will happen in the future
Ryan will starting lavishing Bushra with jewellery and flowers. Lots of flowers.
Ryan will take Bushra away somewhere 5atar but wild for their anniversary.
Ryan will get a really nice place in central London for Bushra, Persia and him to share.
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Babies and travel
It's unusual but not unheard of.
We travelled a lot with our daughter. At age 11 she has already been to 67 countries, a few of them more than once.
She actually feels rather embarrassed about it I think as it's so rare. She usually shifts and stays quiet about it.
A nonconformist by birth.
It meant that over the years from starting off with a pram and big suitcases (age 6months to Japan)... we reduced and reduced our stuff back to the old days of just carry on and as few baggage as possible. Lighter and lighter to be unimpeded to adventure.
We certainly need water though for sure. Or baby powder - we ran out so quickly in Japan. But it was kind of fun running around supermarkets look for some.
So over the years she has been on countless jungle walks (usually with just her parents - no guide), slept in the desert more than once, snorkelled and swam of a hell of a lot of Caribbean islands (yes we did the cruises as well as the proper adventures), ordered pasta or burgers or rice in most far flung places as well as gorgeous foodie European cities (to our dismay) but to her credit she loves fish ...
I don't pretend to be a cook & that's why every partner of mine has been a fantastic cook including her dad thankfully. Also I love fabulous food too.
She has been up so many mountains (quite a lot of them in Switzerland), and volcanoes (Central America). She has done so many hikes with so little because we decided to travel far and fast you need to love to travel and discover and enjoy. Some of the places - I can tell you insect sprays have not worked sadly and some places they have.
And most (99%) tourist spots anywhere in the world however remote even on country holidays - there's some guy/ woman selling coke and water, fridge magnets, Tees, sunglasss and probably braid your hair all for $20. In fact they usually see you coming and follow you down the hike a bit.
And we have encouraged her to be a little free. She is a city girl from London and we love her have that too - it's a privilege the school she has, but it's nice to know about nature and the animals (her grandma is a conservationist amongst other things) and from far flung places.
As well as experience lovely hotels (nice for us to) and also shacks and also a little bit of everything. Why not ? It's a been a blank sheet of paper for us.
Wouldn't everybody if they had a blank sheet of paper want to ?
I know horses for courses, we don't expect that from others - otherwise we would be writing on ...erm ... their blank sheet of paper.
What's the point of having that blank sheet of paper then ?
It's a nice rhythm we got into, no need to instruct or even ask ... in fact you ended up leaving the people in different cultures to just be who they are leaving little of yourself but as much as needed for flow
... which is quite appreciated by locals who in many places are still living with other legacies from British/European rule
.. no asymmetry of information (a good mate of mine terms) required.
... a dialogue ... a conversation ... unwritten rules. The pleasure of conversation ... but a different kind / not a language but a flow.
We get it's a tough world out there and yes brown women and women are the ones to be told they are not enough in every way.
We want her to not see that. Not to even see that it is that way. Not even see the nonsense. Not even to know there is a system to fit in.
But just to do her best and be happy as herself.
She has already done more than most (even more than most patriarchy - she doesn't even know it) ... just with seeing the world.
Yes the last 12 months have been terrible for her - any kid.
But she is a sparkly sparkly chip of the old block so I know that no one can take that away from her to negotiate it back to her. No one gets to write or rewrite her story.
She has her own blank sheet, all beit with 67 countries already on there and a slightly punk mum and dad.
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My work
My partner mentioned that they attack the person , when they can't attack the work. He is not wrong ! I love him. There I said it.
My work :
the innovator : www.bushraburge.com
and a bit more innovation : bushraburge.com/bbstudio
the director : https://www.bushraburge.com/pagecv
the explorer : https://www.travellerspoint.com/map/#/
the writer : https://bushra.travellerspoint.com
the designer : bushra-burge-6wyd.squarespace.com
the public speaker : https://www.bushraburge.com/#/talks1/
the activist : https://www.bushraburge.com/code-of-conduct
there is an academic in there somewhere
the artist :
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Sun and friends
Recently a few odds things have been happening as mentioned. I mean it has been going on for a while but more recently - one mistake and furthermore to cover up the ones before.
I was travelling in Saudi Arabia and somehow - with the usual lie of - we are trying to make fun of a person , duped a hotel receptionist into doing some stupid behaviour in more than one hotel. One was a backwater hotel. The other a 5 star hotel.
I sort of laughed off the backwater hotel - I was on my own, it had been a longish trip but not too bad. And kind of predictable.
The one in Jeddah, was a 5 star hotel, it was around 2/3am during ramadan and I was with my daughter. And I booked with booking.com and then I was charged again when I went to the hotel. It was after a rather extended taxi journey let's say, and extended time waiting for the taxi ... and I wasn't massively bothered but it made it very difficult for an 11yr old girl. After we had a very long journey through Istanbul airport with rather mixed up food as well. Part fasting part picky food. But I had booked the nice hotel for the safety.
And we got double charged. It had never happened before in my life in a 5 star hotel.
And the fake premise is ... but they are schooling a seasoned traveller through real life games, so learn from their mistakes which costs money and time. But the scenarios are just attacks .. as already highlighted the intentions.
and the truth premise is ... we waste the time and money of this person (with daughter if so) because we need to be clinging on to the crypto king for relevance & hopefully she disappears.
But through this, somehow I have got a lot more support than I ever realised or could have. Because clearly crypto king is a ridiculously smart man despite my friends saying he is a scammer. He is a bit scammyaah but in a different way. As they say but he needs to show what this other crowd are like.
And then again a focus on this - how we were double charged at a recent hotel in the countryside and more so again - a reference to it in a nice hotel I am staying in Corfu ... (did I mention I am way a lot ... even in the last 12mths) and then another story to show how beautiful influencers would not complain publicly about hotels because they are nice and keep up appearances or whatever I dunno the nonsense was.
So what is my complaint ... is it the hotels ? Is it receptionists ? Is it staff ?
Nope .... but it is the games and set ups put on by new stalkers. Ok they have a lot more resources.
People say don't engage. I don't.
And a good way to do that is to let it all play out.
So last night I first checked into one hotel, and I looked around - hated it - check in took a very long time... and then I left. No drama.
Booked into the hotel my friends were at. It's gorgeous and hung out. Our daughter's played. The sand and moon were lovely.
It was nice to hang out. We could have ventured further but we felt a sense of peace. And we had all been through a very very tough time. It was nice to just have our girls having fun. We chatting about this and that.
I would be staying with them the next few nights, so offered to pay for them. They are so kind and generous and have been to me over the years and again for the next few days.
I felt a little odd test here or there and control from a far. Something about but will she fight for her chicken kebab. Will she clearly give instruction. We need to make her ask for it.
It's part of the game and what's the worst that happens - she gets a more a rubbishy experience than everyone around - she is a brown woman after all - they need to learn to speak up when they get treated worse than everyone else because we decided that they need to speak up so we are putting in a worse experience.
oh stuck record for 12 mths ... Something about reading glasses and adding up ... stuck record. I may have been exhausted.
Why did I tip despite the not perfect service ...?
Because I know it's not the staff ..
they were late with chicken, this and that and it was an expensive bill over 200 euros .... but it wasn't the staff ... the staff were doing what they were told ....by the most powerful people in the world ...
for ickle pickle me spending my life savings on nice things .... thank you - please mess it up because we need to show she consents to I t....
..... it's Grimes and the weirdos and their games.
And I think we have acknowledged boredom doesn't suit me.
But on the whole I had a lovely chat with my friends and our daughters had lots of fun.
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My lovely little flat in Greenwich ooh I mean Deptford ...south London anyway
Yesterday I went to see some properties in the Brighton Marina.
It is a pretty part of Brighton, a gated development with sea views and I had taken my partner and I to stay in one of the airbnbs there.
My only reservation was - which I bemoaned was I didn't like the look of the development. It felt dated. Like my own property in Greenwich.
Particularly as I loved the old classic Victorian or Edwardian villas and I had even seen some gorgeous Georgian style houses in Brighton to buy. Brighton has a ridiculously beautiful stock of houses.
But I am still waiting for another house sale to go through and I would not have time to buy somewhere in time before Persia started at Brighton College.
When I met Julian in the early 2000s on a blind date through a mutual friend. My friend from university was working at JPMorgan on his first job and Julian was his boss at the time. My friend stayed in the city and is now an MD at JPM for his sins.
I was working in insurance as an AS400 developer and earning quite a lot of money actually up in Manchester - I felt at the time. My mom told me to buy a property there - I wish I had they were very cheap at the time and hadn't had the leap yet.
But then - like in my life weird lucky things happen. They decided to move some of the tech team down to a place called Edenbridge ... actually 40minutes drive from my parents house. So yes within a year of me moving up to Manchester ... I was relocated down to by parents house from where I came ! And they paid for relocation costs so increased our salary for those who chose to move. So I doubled my salary pretty much over night and got to move back into my parents - which meant I could save money.
At the same time I started seeing Julian as I said.
He had started renovating houses in the evenings whilst working as a banker during the day. I have thing for alpha male talented workaholics.
His own father had him quite old and Julian wanted to retire nicely by the age of 40 and enjoy a nice life. He also wanted a nice life before retirement as well. And in those days houses were going up in value whether you renovated them or not.
Yes it meant we could afford to be away 5months of the yr spending approx 50k on adventures and also in deed Julian was retired by the age of 40. He still worked a little for something to do for a few years after but this was from working like a crazy person. I will talk more about our experience of renovating houses.
Houses are a way most people in the UK have made money. As long as they bought a property before the 2000s. And all people did in London / UK was talk about house prices.
So at this point I as around 26/27 years old working as a programmer for an insurance company.
So the first property I met Julian in (it was his second renovation) was this quite ridiculously grand house in Woodford on the Monkham's Estate. Something similar to one of these.
I was mid-late 20s and he was early thirties. And he had already created a beautiful house he/we could have settled in.
In fact the guy who bought the house was someone about 20years older than us and he was head of IT of an investment bank.
I had this feeling at the time, that I really needed to buy my own place.
I had every intention but it was really important before Julian and I moved in, otherwise people will always say I only managed to buy my own property because I married a banker. That my assets I had achieved were my own achievements.
No one can take that away from you. Especially as a young person.
So I went to look for properties. Julian drove me around to properties which needed renovation work over in east London near to him.
I wanted to stay south London nearish to my parents and I wanted a riverside property near a park under £200000. At the time my previous boyfriend and friends from university lived in Blackheath and Charlton nearby. I had loads of friends in the area.
And I wanted to be able to rent it out easily.
I had saved up about £40k from my earnings. And found the flat I wanted. I could afford £187000.
So this was around 2001/02.
Even with my high salary at the time and savings it was quite difficult to get a mortgage. I guess it must have been quite unusual for again a single brown woman not born in the his country going into a bank with a job in tech salary slips asking for a £150k mortgage. I looked a lot younger ! It freaked people out. I remember I met a girl in her 20s at a friends party and god knows what someone had to said to her but she started quizzing me on my property. And a woman in my office came up to me and said - Darling we need to tell you something you can't afford that property.
It was so weird.
But my other friends in professional jobs were buying properties and everyone had some mortgage story, so I was like whatever. It's what people did. Shrugs shoulders.
A friend of mine introduced me to a mortgage broker and he tried to help me get a mortgage but they really delayed everything and I nearly lost the property. I was so legit it was unbelievable - where was the risk ?
And then a new online mortgage company appeared owned by one of the big financial institutions and they gave me a mortgage within 10 days of me applying.
Did I mention I grew up in a seaside town Southport - we are far from sea views but I always dreamt about it. And then when I was at Imperial College I would dream about living in one of wharfs. And then docklands was like a fancy yuppie thing. God I was such a yuppie Blairite.
This was before Shoreditch became cool by the way.
And I bought my 2 bed flat with a slight river view and some parking.
Got a lodger another friend from uni who had a job at JPM. And actually I hardly spent much time there because I got together with Julian and eventually moving in with him and renting my flat out - which I have for about 20years and paying off the mortgage.
I am proud of myself for that achievement. I did it all myself. In my 20s already. Yayeee !
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Be everything love everything
I think that there is a misnomer in life. These are based on stereotypes which then perpetuate as people try and categorise.
Especially if you get bored easily ... one type of thing is ...let's try that other thing for a bit and now this and now that. Can I not decide .. ? No I have decided I enjoy a bit of everything even obsessively but not too much of anything for too long. But it is good to have a solid base. And I love my friends and family forever.
That you if read books you don't like fashion
if you have do science you don't do art
if you like walking you don't like dancing
if you eat savoury you don't like sweets
if you love lying about you don't like exercise
if you love words you don't like visuals
if you love home made craft if you don't like designer couture
if you love travel you don't like your homebase
if you love love this it doesn't mean you don't love love that
if you if you
it's not true.
You can love everything. Tutti Frutti.
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Faith
Yesterday was a sunny day. I may have been hugging trees.
And it gave me the faith that everything was going to be ok.
I stood up to some demons. And I also helped my partner stand up to his own.
So all in all a victorious day healing myself and others around me.
Lucky me.
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Trust
There is still the rest of the world to go.
More than half.
I will be revisiting others.
I have a life time of work so far anyway already. And another life time ahead of me.
Can't wait.
I can't stop sharing my adventure. I have notebooks with a few pages written or drawn on and also platforms and across all sorts of media. I am so glad for it.
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Hollywood
My life is very predictable.
Currently I am being harassed about the most intimate parts of my life with my partner. What we do in bed. Between a couple.
Again it is an area which Grimes is so incensed by, she has to show that she has access to all areas of our lives by ridiculing it. But more than that show how she is closer to my partner. But it just shows an obsession and a vindictiveness. How has she got hold of this information. Stalking of course.
Again irrelevant to my professional work of course.
But relevant to jealousy directed at me.
A couple of days ago, I had to take my daughter's rucksack and suitcase to her dad's on the bus and my car was being used by my partner. An Eritrean lady came on the bus with a rug in a bag which would not easily go on. A reference to sex. I am petite, my partner is a big guy.
Predictable again.
I took the opportunity to chat to her as a real person. She was lovely. And I helped her and beckoned the people around to help her too.
Yesterday I went to the dentist for a routine check up. The dentist was called
Anish Patel at Jasmine Dental Studios. I had gathered from previous friends that people who are duped into this private moments I do not consent to, have been told that it is all about helping me, or part of a candid camera joke style episode.
So he mentioned something about me gagging myself while I had an x-ray film in my teeth when my teeth were being x-rayed.
He of course did not know that what the reference was. An ongoing harassment and stalking by Grimes and her team.
I welcome anyone - journalists, police to check with this dentist.
Then I went onto the beautician to get upper leg and a Hollywood wax. The beautician was called Millies, Clapham Park Road, London. I have used this beautician previously. Lots of things did not go right. I never had any experience like it.
What was the point of this set up?
The set up was again to justify the motive by the on going harassment of my personal life. My home space. My experiences with beauticians.
That I don't like beautiful things. I don't like a nice clean environment. That I don't understand design and living nicely.
Because yes brown women don't understand or see these things.
So beauticians and cleaners and the like have to downgrade themselves to make my life worse ... and I won't care because again ... surveillance data is used to 'help me' not 'harm me'. Otherwise I would protest but then I am a complainer right. So collection of this data is for good.
Well my feedback is that here is a case study of parliament, for police where the data is being used to hurt me.
Here there was a different imperative. Because in every interaction there have been attempts to reduce my life experience through on going scams through this harassment.
Of course I knew this going to happen the predictability of it, so it is good to expose it as it unfolded. Again this is not against Millie or my beautician Carolina. Contacting beauticians, masseuses and these safe spaces being violated by rich people because they need to retain fame has been going on for 12 months and of course the previous harassment for 4 years prior.
I welcome anyone - journalists, police to check with this beautician.
I explained repeatedly, it is important that the beauty experience where I take all my clothes of needs to be a safe space not a place where people come to play games.
None of this enhances my life. But it is important I speak about this because I want people to know what is going on with surveillance data.
Does it take me away from my actual work - my metaverse blog. Well I have already got 6 editions and a prototype, I can clearly do all of that.
But yesterday I had to deal with these time wasters.
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Inspired to say so much.
I have since Ramadan REdiscovered the writer in me.
New ideas, not ones thrifted down or regurgitating the same script over and over again. Did anyone see the boredom across my face.
Give me something new. Can people come up with an actual new thing ?
So anyway ....
writing has been great. I recommend it to anyone.
So what does it take to heal from grief and industry weirdos l :
Enjoying being with loved ones
Creating system changes especially racist and other discriminatory ones
Prayers
Fasting
Exercise
Adventures - seeing the world and sharing
Enjoying food
Creating, just coming up with new stuff .. wow to love the way my brain works
Also the way I am with people and my heart
And meeting new people from all around the world
As well as reconnecting with old friends
Hanging out with people in real life generally ... can you believe to protect that part of my life I checked out of that
Having the love of a partner who has gone all in to show you who he is without the baggage and despite the attacks ... boy the lengths people go to be relevant
I realised also I love all the nice things in life as well
luxury designer clothes, jewellery, luxury holidays, fabulous food whether my partner has made it or it's from fancy restaurants
beautiful houses
art and interiors
I love life. As I always have.
But I also love to tell and share stories through whatever format.
The power of journalling.
So I have a blank sheet I can have anything I want in the world ...
...... but I have already had everything I wanted so I want some more of that.
Living in the moment. I do.
I live it and I check to see if I want to be in a situation, I change my mind, I check the big picture - how else have I managed to expose Grimes, Yates or anyone else who might come along.
That's what happens when you are a leader. You look at the bigger picture not the minutae the whole time. Trying to control the moments or script it or get people to walk past you saying .. .suggary sweet ... just shows that the bigger picture is lost.
My movement is live in the expanse of the universe of multidimensionally. Rise above the minutae.
So what do I want ... I want all the things I want from my previous chapter which I built up independently and / or with my ex husband. But more ... to build on the fabulous life I had before.
And a unicorn metaverse travelogue company.
ps I also apparently absolutely love not wearing bra ... this is going to be my new thing.
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Walking away from gaslighting
Turns out is very easy.
I’ve had a lovely time with lovely people these last few days.
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